To really not find this 'joke' funny?

[BlahblahSheep]

Quick background, my husband has older children and we have one child together. I was extremely clear when I met him that I wanted children so if he didn't want anymore we should leave it there. He assured me he did want more.

Anyway, basically now whenever he asks me to do something for him like make a brew or whatever it is, he'll say something like 'C'mon, I had a child for you, I already had two'. Basically he did me a favour so now I can do one for him.

He laughs and says he's joking but he's said it multiple times and it's really starting to fuck me off. He is joking in the sense that the things he's asking for a trivial little things and he isn't actually bothered if I don't make him a cup of tea or whatever but still.

I said to him last night when he did it again that I don't find it funny, he's basically saying he didn't want our child which I find hurtful not just toward me but toward our DC as well.

He's a good dad and I know he adores our child but I just don't find this funny at all and actually pretty fucking horrible.

He thinks I'm overreacting and it's a joke. I think he must be saying the truth but playing it off as a joke.

I can't believe he has been joking about this for 2 years even after you have mentioned you don't find it funny. Bit of a dickhead move imo. Does he always have such a shit sense of humour? 😅

The "joke" is insensitive not only from the aspect of "I had a child for you" but also because "I already had two [with another woman]."

I'd start dropping in unfavourable comparisons between him and your ex, see just how hilarious he finds that.

Any joke isn't funny after several repeats but you saying it means he doesn't want your child is taking it too far .

I was just going to post the same thing. What a shame it would be if he didn’t “get the joke.”

Ouch! @WhereYouLeftIt has hit the nail on the head. That's why he keeps doing it, and that's why it hurts.

I had a fiance 'joke' constantly that if i ever dumped him whilst we were married he would take 'half my pension' as I have a good job.

It was not a joke at all and there was truth behind it'

Low and behold when I dumped him his first move (within minutes) was to empty our 'shared account' he had marched me to the bank to open and tried to insist I put more money in being a higher earner (I didn't). He withdrew thousands.
Small price to pay to never have to see him again.

I feel actually quite triggered after reading what he has said to you after my own lived expierence I take 'jokes' as 'truth'. I know other people might feel different.
I find people like this have a low threshold with jokes about themselves.

I have a friend who is already having this with her new husband saying 'if your lucky you can have one kid' joking tee hee - it makes me feel sick 🤮

My opinion entirely

Total overreaction, OP.

But if you've said you don't find it funny he should drop it.

Repeatedly telling the same unfunny joke is annoying as it is, without it being something that actually upsets you.

Regardless of what everyone on here thinks, the fact is that YOU find it upsetting and therefore he should stop saying it. And find better/some new material 😂

Though to be fair - it might not be a deliberate strategy, more like poking at a sore spot. There is a real difference between you and you both know it's there but you can't acknowledge it openly. So he pokes and you react.

"He who jokes, confesses."

(Italian proverb, I believe.)

Good proverb

I had a similar situation OP
My ex kept saying that our dd was his "last daughter" and i would say huh?? It was a strange comment because i had wanted more kids..
And he would make this offhand comment again and again even though i kept asking him what he meant by that ..

It turns out that he was cheating on me for years with multiple women and he had a secret son, the other women got pregnant one month after me
And he abandoned her and didnt tell anyone about this little boy until years later
He confessed during an argument to spite me ..

He also used to give me scenarios like what would you do if i got someone pregnant and also telling me about his friends cheating on their girlfriends,
Looking back it was glaringly obvious ..

So my point is that some men seem to "test the waters" by saying these jokes and comments to gage your reaction to things..