Patronising MN replies that people pretend are sincere…

[Itsbadbitchoclockyeahitsthickthirty]

I’ll go first:

”Are you very young OP?”

Any threads about bad relationships or dating..."my DH is amazing but if anything happened to him I wouldn't bother with another man'.

No one can possibly know that. It's just a way of saying I HAVE A GOOD MAN...thank god I'm not in your position.

The absolute worst! Totally unhelpful - what can she do about it now?-, and blaming the victim. And we all know abusers don't start out as abusers.

'Hi, man here!'

"I'm really confused!". No you aren't, you're just belitting the poster.

Google is your friend

I totally agree - how many times do we see "NDN is sitting in my garden, parking in my car space, eating food from my fridge, breathing the same air as me and they wont stop"

Well, what did they say when you told them thats not on!?

Well, nothing, I havent actually talked to them about it

Fuck off and talk to them and then come and complain

"Have you left yet OP"

Often posted a few hours after the initial OP

I hate this; as if there is a limit on how frequent you post. Also the “first post, OP? I can’t find any of your other posts”. For a site that allows name changes, it’s a senseless question.

Bad English/Grammar… “Sorry OP, are you OK? Is English not your first language?” So irritating.

This doesn’t belong in here but another one that irritates me is if the OP is rude about something (let’s say saying something negative about a fat person), there will always be that person that replies along the lines of “you are rude OP….would you say that to a Black person”. As a Black person, I’m always like WTF do Black people have to do with this topic! It’s so basic.

‘Your post doesn’t make sense OP, what does [insert tiny grammatical error] mean ?

Then attempt to correct tiny grammatical error and fail to respond to the thread topic entirely.

'Havent you posted about this before?'

The sheer horror of being....drum roll.....a SAHM. What the fuck are you thinking? Think of your pension, impending marriage implosion, destitution, total loss of self and identity etc etc etc

Where are the paragraphs

And question marks??

I read that more as 'my husband is amazing but it's still a compromise. It was barely' maybe worth it for him but I wouldn't risk it again.

I couldn't get to the end but you should....insert all manner of life ruining advice contradicting everything the op has said and then

It's neither an accident nor an emergency. It can wait til you see the GP.

Sometimes this is actually a valid comment.

"Could they be autistic"

I read the sex is totally dire, and I wouldn't put myself through it again for anybody but he is a good sort and has great life cover 😅

"You sound like hard work" nobody ever says this about a man by the way.

Ugh.

Sounds like an awful lot of sugar/salt/carbs

OP, you must have rather limited social skills.

I'd rather people asked questions than made assumptions like in the OP

“First world problems”

FFS do you think that’s original? Bore off if you think the problem is so beneath you.

“What’s your AIBU?”