AIBU to just let DD go to school with earrings in.

[PinkChaires]

School starts tomorrow and DD is saying that she will go to school her earrings in (not allowed). Now i dont agree that earrings shouldnt be allowed however they are the school rules. Ive said to her health and safety but she says that 1) my earrings are small and screw on- there is no chance of them falling off or getting caught on something. Tbh shes right- shes worn these earring from nursery right through primary school and there has never been an issue. 2) if its health and safety concerns why are the teachers wearing earrings. Shes right on this to- in events and parents evenings ive seen the teachers wear earrings/jewellery. Shes gotten phone calls home about this and got shouted at by the school but she says to me ' its a bit hard to take them seriously about the danger of earrings when they have like 5 earrings as well'. I cant get hett up about her wearing the earrings to school. Shes doing amazing in all other areas of school so far and this seems like a pointless rule
AIBU?

I’m a nurse and my uniform policy has rules pertaining to jewellery - I’m only allowed one pair of plain studs and a plain smooth wedding band, nothing else. Many professions do, it’s part of adult professional life that certain dress standards are met.

Take them out. If a kid can't learn that in life there are always rules to be followed it makes it harder for them. The school don't need parents allowing kids to buck the system.

Oh, they do. And because parents often buy little slip on shoes/loafers/pumps with no grip or support because that's what sold as 'girls' school shoes', they end up stacking face first on concrete or down the steps quite spectacularly at times.

If she is Y10 then I'd just let her face the consequences at school. Also as another poster suggested is there a school council she could join to put forward her argument for earrings being allowed.

Plain studs are OK at my dc school and tbh I'm with her that if they're not allowed at hers it's a bit ridiculous (I don't have any piercings and not do my dc so I have no horse in this race). At her age I'd do as you are doing and let her decide for herself and take any/all consequences.

There is plenty of justification for the policy of no earrings.
If your children are able to think critically, they should be able to work this out for themselves.

If you want your DD to be truly independent as an adult, she'll need paid work . Part of a parents job is to ensure their child acquires the social skills and judgement to thrive out in the world. It's misleading to encourage pointless conflict/trouble that ultimately will disadvantage her.

Its time for your DD to recognise that when she enters the adult
world of employment, she WILL be required to comply with demands and expectations set by her employer or profession, landlord or bank. Otherwise her opportunities will be limited.

If she's dead set on being a non-conformist oddball, I recommend she cultivates and practices the camouflage skill of public discretion.

I agree that the rule seems pointless, especially for small, simple studs. However, it is a rule. I also respect your thought process of letting her decide then letting her face the consequences.

But I am surprised that you think comparing the rules for pupils and teachers is in any way comparable! Why on earth do you think adult professionals at their place of work should have the same uniform rules as children at school??

oh hello, the i will only follow the rules that suit me brigade has arrived

Considering secondary school children are allowed to use football boots, baseball bats, saws, hammers, chisels, kitchen knives etc. I’m not sure why there is so much concern about stud earrings. I think it is a hangover from when earrings were disapproved of by certain people in society.

I understand it for primary aged pupils. Having witnessed a little girl get hit in the head with a ball at break time and have the earring pierce the back of her ear/neck has always stuck with me. Very ick and upsetting for all. Secondary pupils less so as they aren’t likely to be running around the playground like loons unaware of dangers.

Your daughter needs to learn that rules need to be followed, often for reasons she doesn't understand, and that what she wants doesn't always come first.

We have a six month graduate on a final warning for eating food in a sterile lab environment. She'll be fired next time. She still doesn't seem to get the idea that it's important and rules apply to her too.

Don't let your daughter become that brat.

To the people saying that she will have to comply with workplace dress code when older, yes she will. However she is 15 and this is going to teach her the consequences of not following rules. I agree that she shouldnt compare herself to adults but that also means adults shouldnt compare themselves to her

Maybe unpopular but if she is going into year 10 then this really isn't about "letting" her wear them.

You can put your foot down and say no earrings for school but I 100% guarantee you that those earrings will be back in before the registration bell rings.

If she will not follow the rules then she will face the consequences. End of.

Well done you caught on quick. Always have, always will 👍

It might seem like a pointless rule to you & quite probably is but it's still a rule. End of. Life is full of them. She needs to get used to it.

Those are all fully supervised and the actual paperwork and procedures in place for some of them are actually extremely detailed and extensive - if a child then causes harm to themselves or another child with the things, there's a good chance the staff member will never work in education again. Unless, of course, your child is at the one non existent school in the country where they're told 'here's your school issue scalpel, off you pop, try not to stab yourself or somebody else with it over the next year'.

I have seen loads of kids like this during my kids schooling and tbh they are a pain in the arse. Entitled kids who think they can do what they like and enjoy the attention.

I’d also let her face the consequences and if the school contacted me about it, I’d tell them I’d back whatever punishment they see fit. She’s way past old enough to decide and then take whatever the outcome is.

Take them out. Teachers have got enough to deal with already

A message to your DD is that there will be other pupils in her class who have followed the rules and done the right thing for the good of the class, so she needs to do likewise. Sometimes in life we all have to do things we don't want to do, for the wider good, and she is now old enough to think more like a grown up than a child.

It's an absolute ridiculous rule. My daughter is the same. She's starting high school tomorrow and keeping them and waiting to see if anyone says anything. She will take them out for PE but other than that the school expect them to act like young adults then they should be treated like that. All through primary she was allowed earring in. It really is pathetic.

A girl at my school ignored the rules about earrings, or should I say rebelled. She was super cool and hard. She left at 14 because she was pregnant. Is that what you want to happen??

It's not about being special. It's about high school kids wearing tiny studs in the lower lobe. I get taking them out for PE. But high school expect the kids to act like adults but then have these silly rules that even they can't abide by.

Surely your DD should go along to the student council or similar and request for the rule to be reviewed? Given that many schools do not have this rule, it can't be a serious H&S risk. This is far better than just ignoring the rule.