To judge gender disappointment?

[illstayinthepoolanddrown]

When that person has a baby gender reveal party?

I’ve seen (from both parents) where after the reveal and everyone is cheering they are stood there miserable, or they’ve started crying and even seen some where they walk off.

The worst one I’ve just seen was twins and it was blue confetti first and the mum just shrugged and everyone looked awkward, second confetti was pink and she’s screaming and jumping with joy. How horrible for that little boy to maybe one day see that video.

I do think gender disappointment is valid and I’m sure most who feel it wish they didn’t. I just don’t get why you’d put yourself in that situation to be the centre of attention when it could turn out pretty bad.

as a person who was told i was infertile at 17(severe PCOS and never seen a period and im 41)i agree a million percent

somehow i managed to have 2 natural pregnancies(ie no ivf)m ive no idea how as like i said ive never seen a period.
boys are 18 and 12,both got many complex disabilities each and need 24/7 care but i dont care.

i was so grateful to actually be pregnant, major shock with no 1 as i didnt know till 8 weeks as i had sever HV, and went tot he doctors to be told im pregnant,2nd was 4 years of clomid tablets and i found out at 2 and half weeks so any sex was grateful
in fact i never found out on either both were a surprise

it turned out to be 2 boys but i was so grateful and shocked (im a atheist so dont believe in none of that god sent them crap)to be pregnant i didnt care.

i know some one who's on her 9th,shes kept trying and trying for a boy as the first 8 was girls.

our hospitals policy is they wont tell you the sex and she cant afford a private scan so its a waiting game and if this is a girl she's keeping on trying.

she's already 45 and oldest is 20,youngest 3

I can't imagine being disappointed either way. What's there to be disappointed about? You created life, a lovely little life who is going to be the centre of your world whatever sex they are. I wish people would just be content with what they have rather than feeling like they should have one of each. Tbh I blame the media and society for stereotyping the sexes so ridiculously.

This.

Interesting if it's the first time you've heard it perhaps. Problem is, most of us have heard it many, many times before, and would prefer not to have the conversation interrupted again.

Yes to this!

I judge. I think if there's any chance for gender disappointment, you shouldn't be filming it at all. It also seems to always be blue that I see people get upset by.

You may not be able to control how you feel, but you can certainly control how you react. It's not as though it isn't a possibility of 1 in 2 that you might be disappointed at a gender reveal. And filming it means there's a very real possibility that child will see it when they grow up. How devastating to learn you weren't wanted because you were the wrong sex.

Interesting if it's the first time you've heard it perhaps. Problem is, most of us have heard it many, many times before, and would prefer not to have the conversation interrupted again.

Yep, I ignore it now.

The loss of a relationship like you had hoped for or imagined.

Let's not lie that girls and boys aren't different in terms of their long term relationships with their families as a whole

The age old saying is typically true - a sons a son until he finds a wife, a daughter is a daughter all her life.

We had sex selective IVF for all our children because we didn't want to risk the natural outcome, but I can understand those who are disappointed and have no idea until they pop that ballon or spray the confetti

YANBU. It's one thing to experience gender disappointment privately, and to possibly confide this in a few close friends. But it's awful when people display it so openly in videos that their children are very likely to see.

FWIW I hate the whole gender reveal thing in general. A party celebrating an unborn child's genitals?!

But if you genuinely fear you are going to get one sex and not the other, why on God’s green earth would you discover this in a public setting, film your reaction and put it on the internet?

Several friends of mine have been through a variety of (late) miscarriages, a stillbirth, and an infant death. As well as infertility.
People should be grateful they're having a healthy baby.

Gender reveal parties are disgusting too.

I think/hope some of these people are actually just pretending that they’re disappointed, so they can post it online. Then they get loads of views and comments like ‘I’m disgusted’ or ‘I felt this way too hun’, it’s all for the views, attention and drama. They’re not even finding out the sex of the baby for the first time at the gender reveal, most already know.

There’s a couple on tiktok that have a lot of followers, I know them in real life (lucky me) and they stage most of their stuff and people seem to think it’s real. 🤷🏻‍♀️ The comments are either really supportive or people that are outraged. They’ve recently staged their gender reveal with the dad being disappointed. They also pretend that they’ve got people’s numbers on nights out and make it look like they’ve cheated and other random shit. Lots of people love them, it’s a mystery to me. 😂 I mostly watch dogs, music, food stuff but they’re still on my fyp along with similar stuff, plenty of gender reveals. I find it hard to believe anyone would film themselves finding out the sex of their baby and putting it out there if they were genuinely disappointed.

You don't get to decide what people should be grateful for

Many couples who have struggled with infertility and losses still suffer with GD

I hate that stupid son and daughter quote.

I am NC with my mother. Dh is NC with his mother. Both toxic parents.

Same it's a load of bullshit. I know more males that are closer to their parents and wider families than females. DP and his brother are also close with MIL.

Yabu people have their own reasons and it's very personal to want either sex. I'm enjoying having a dd and if I could choose I would have a son. Just so I could enjoy and experience that. I would be disappointed if I was having another dd obviously I'd get over it but I would be hoping a lot I had a ds just because that's what I'd like and I don't think there's anything wrong with hoping for a certain sex.

You might think it's stupid but it tends to be representative looking at a population level

It's natural for women to be the drivers in their familial relationships, therefore in most straight couples a man will spend more time with his in laws over his own parents

Taking away gender reveal parties, which are not my thing, I think disappointment at finding out the sex can be a valid emotion.

I was upset to find out that dd2 was a dd2 because I couldn't imagine loving another daughter as well as dd1. I was coping with debilitating migraines, working, looking after dd1 pretty much by myself as Dh was under a massive amount of work stress, working 14 hour days and depressed. The guilt that I felt that dd1 wasn't getting my full attention and might be jealous of a new sister was too much.

I loved them both the same once dd2 was born of course but will never forget that awful feeling of upset at not having a boy.

How would you feel if you were the son/daughter of that person who expresses such disappointment in a video you're likely to see?

This!

It is usually boys that cause the disappointment and I wish it wasn't, they are amazing and so loving.

There are between 90 and 110 million 'missing' women and girls because of sex selection abortion, female infanticide and abuse and neglect of girls globally.

Depending on your culture, it could be either. Girls definitely suffer worse though.

Excellent, have fun.

@crosstalk a sex reveal party doesn’t sound very family friendly.

Oh how I agree!!