I have outgrown men

[Namechanged007]

Before all the namalt brigade come along I'm well aware.

Thing is it's true I have outgrown the ridiculouness and childishness of men.

I'm married but even so I feel like I'd be better off alone most of the time. Nothing wrong with dh as such but I'm more able and stronger alone.

I have just been to the pub and all the women were complimentary of each other. Going with the flow. And enjoying themselves. The men were either grumpy or showing brovado. There was an incident on our table that involved new men intimidating each other and I just went home.

The thing is this isn't a table of young men. It's professionals and grown ups. I just cant be bothered with it.

None of the women got involved but it spoilt the night.

I told dh I don't have time for such pathetic behaviour.

It never ends. It doesn't matter how old or wise we become men seem to revert back to this strange behaviour.

I deal with it day in day out at my work and I simply can't be bothered. If I never had to see another man, mansplaining, dominating conversation, throwing their weight around, bravado, dick measuring, causing a scene in my life it would be too soon.

Absolutely done with it.

I agree.

Although I still want to think that there are some decent men out there I have also reached a point where the violence, porn obsession, selfishness and general immaturity displayed by so many men means that I choose not to mix with straight men anymore if I can avoid it.

I think we still have a society which allows toxic masculinity to run rampant.

For me the last straw was being assaulted by a male so-called friend. I have not trust in them left whatsoever after that.

Yanbu

You don’t have to emigrate to make new friends FGS unless you’re trapped at the arse end of the country in a hamlet with a population of 12 and miles away from civilisation. The point is that it’s always the people who have never moved cities/countries/continents that whinge about their crappy friends with their twat boyfriends/husbands not realising, you don’t have to stay in that friendship group, and no it’s not hard to find new friends.

YANBU OP. Many of them are able to emulate being decent human beings, but deep down, they are mostly twats.

All of this. All the time. I'm so tired of them. I know some corkers who are lovely people, but they are a tiny, tiny minority of the men I know, meet, see and hear.

Go it alone OP. Much better.

I don't think I ever want to live with a man again.

No I'm not a femcel (never heard of it) I'm not anything I'm just a normal woman bored of mens bullshit.

I don't have a circle as such so it's not that I hang around with a group and have outgrown them. I mix with different people all the time.

YABU

YANBU - I too would never look for another relationship. Men never grow up - selfish to the core. Some less than others, but still selfish. It pains me to say this as I have an 11 year old son. I'm doing my best to shape him into a kind, empathetic adult, who can regulate his emotions, but after 30 years, I think I'm on a loser with his father. They get worse with age.

According to Google a femcel is a woman who hates men and women and can't have sex or attract a partner. As in my op I'm married and I don't fit that narrative I anyway

My brother made the exact opposite observation at the weekend - but not in a good way.

We were at my aunt’s 80th birthday party and towards the end, he made the observation that all the 80-something women were interesting and interested - engaged, bubbly, chatty and fun.

The men were all slightly shell-ish versions of - presumably - their younger selves.

Seated. Withered. Insular. Not engaged. No chat.

Once my bother pointed it out, I couldn’t un-see it. It was so marked. FWIW, my brother is gay. He and his husband spent most of the do chatting with the interesting women.

YANBU. I've been thinking this myself recently. I know good men, I live with one and am friends with some. But overall, and especially the alpha types... they're very dull. I don't care about what they think, don't want to read their books or listen to their music. Women are so much more interesting, inspiring.

I'm 40, so I strongly suspect this is peri-menopause starting. I have no need of men anymore.

Women's lived are better without male partners. It's an established fact. I would encourage any straight woman to consider building a life on her own terms and never living with a man, never cooking, cleaning, etc for a man. Never marry a man - consider having a family without male involvement apart from sperms donation.

I'm well aware this may seem extreme, but men have been leaching off of women for generations, and it's time to put an end to it.

That's ironic. There was a scene yesterday where I work and it was all women involved, the men were very polite and were apologetic.

@UnboxedThoughts here here

Hear hear even stupid phone

I don't know.... I find a lot of women bitchy and nasty towards other women. A lot are very loud and gobby.
Most of my friends are men and none are like what the OP described.

YANBU. Like others here I know that if DH leaves or passes away I shall never seek another relationship.

YANBU

I have decided, after two long relationships and one divorce - I have learned my lesson and it’s just not worth having anything to do with men anymore. At least not in a romantic/relationship way. YANBU

And the common denominator in all these relationships?

Would that be you perhaps?

I agree as a general observation of 'the sex class that is men'.

obviously within that group there are men who are generally good eggs, men who I love and men who I care about a great deal and I am friends with same for most women.

but that doesn't stop men as a whole class just being a bit shit. Almost entirely all of the shit in the world is caused and led by men.

Theres an awful lot of biological/hormonal shindiggery going on that makes women as a sex class often far too tolerant of this, especially during their child bearing decades.

I am not ready to give up my male friends yet.
However, I am truly sick of other people’s dull husbands.

Fuck, piss off and loudly discuss sport across someone else’s table. And no, I don’t think your opinion on politics is as interesting as your wife’s.

@Numbat2022 I'm also 40 and think it could be early signs of menopause. I've had my children. Men can sod off and their screaming inadequacies are so obvious now.