I have outgrown men

[Namechanged007]

Before all the namalt brigade come along I'm well aware.

Thing is it's true I have outgrown the ridiculouness and childishness of men.

I'm married but even so I feel like I'd be better off alone most of the time. Nothing wrong with dh as such but I'm more able and stronger alone.

I have just been to the pub and all the women were complimentary of each other. Going with the flow. And enjoying themselves. The men were either grumpy or showing brovado. There was an incident on our table that involved new men intimidating each other and I just went home.

The thing is this isn't a table of young men. It's professionals and grown ups. I just cant be bothered with it.

None of the women got involved but it spoilt the night.

I told dh I don't have time for such pathetic behaviour.

It never ends. It doesn't matter how old or wise we become men seem to revert back to this strange behaviour.

I deal with it day in day out at my work and I simply can't be bothered. If I never had to see another man, mansplaining, dominating conversation, throwing their weight around, bravado, dick measuring, causing a scene in my life it would be too soon.

Absolutely done with it.

No, it simply wouldn't apply the other way around.

Of course I don't think anyone with a different view from me is a man.
Some posters on here are men. Some admit it. Some pretend to be women and sometimes that's really obvious.
Why is it 'sad' that I know this? I thought it was fairly obvious?

This thread is one of the worst I’ve seen on Mumsnet. It is chock full of the worst kind of stereotyping and bigotry. Kudos to those who have challenged it.

I am glad that Mumsnet have not sought to censor the many extreme posts because it is interesting to know what they are thinking, but at the same time it’s hard to see how many of the posts don’t constitute hate crimes.

if these posts were directed at any other protected characteristic they would be deleted very quickly indeed and it’s probably only a matter of time before Mumsnet has to deal with a dilemma over these kinds of posts.

Don't be testerical.

You know nothing. It’s glaringly apparent that 100% of the posters you think are men happen to be the ones who disagree with you. If you really could tell who is a man pretending to be a woman, then it wouldn’t be a case of all of them being posters who disagree, now would it? This accusation of “you must be a man” or the other toxic slurs like “handmaiden” or “cool girl/wife” is often trotted out against posters who form a minority dissenting opinion on threads.

Its definitely sad you literally think that real women can’t possibly have a vastly different opinion from you such that you think they must be men pretending to be women.

Nothing to do with fearless honesty. I said a woman generally wouldn't need to.
Let's not be so disingenuous as to pretend that it's not easier for women to find men who will have no strings sex (which is all the poster said she wanted) with them than vice versa.
This removes the need to lie, use 'patter' or 'skill' in the quest for sex. Mostly, we would just need to turn up.

Some men would disagree. There’s some really toxic misogynist stuff on 4Chan and YouTube with men saying exactly that and worse about women. Usually it’s based on bad experiences with a few women causing them to say such sexist hate-based generalisations.

I've raised this with MNHQ before and have done so again after seeing this thread

They won't care though

If you're a man or a man dressing as or wanting to be a woman you're fair game on here

But say anything negative about women on mass? Thread pulled for not being in the spirit of the site

@5128gap

It's sad you 'think' you know that

Apart from the 2-3 male posters who are known to be male you have no idea the sex of others

Everyone you think is a male poster just so happens to have a different opinion to you

That's what's sad

YANBU

They have their faults, and those start to get harder to tolerate once you have outgrown any use for them.

The patronising is the worst.

Exactly

I have a small core of friends who I've known for some time (mainly male some female) we're comfortable in each others company so no posturing needed.

If you think the idiocy of men is bad just remember the nastiness of women, nice to your face nasty behind your back. Those friendly ladies you had fin with in the pub will be ripping you to shreds when you're not there (someone else if you sre).

People are as said shit.

Would you ( plural) not need to speak at all then? The weather, whats your name , that sort of thing ?

That old ' what would you find to talk about the morning after ' joke. Football and his genitalia are out of bounds. Gotta have some self respect.
But then his opinion on anything else is not worth knowing.

You could make it a condition that he remains silent 😶. They're all - ahem - gagging for it aren't they ?

I've already said I don't 'literally' think everyone who disagrees with me is a man.
Nor, for that matter do I think every man on here holds disagreeable opinions.
There's a man who has posted on this very thread whose posts I always find interesting, thought provoking and respectful.
There are other men on this thread with whom i disagree.

Thats not what I said. I didn’t say you think everyone who disagrees with you is a man. I said everyone you have accused of being a man pretending to be a woman also happens to disagree with you.

That's an interesting point. I've found this thread quite educational and it's really water off a ducks back as it doesn't apply to me. However I'm a minority and did try replacing 'men' with my race or 'gay', 'muslim', 'travelers' etc.

I'll be honest and say I'm not sure. Mostly because I know of some complete dick heads so get the sentiment, but there have been some extreme comments posted that are a bit borderline.

i just feel a bit sad for some women really. Life can be shit (I've had my fair share) but is quite depressing if you're mentally in the place that's being described by many PP's.

You'd have to give me the list of posters on here I've 'accused of being a man' for me to comment on that really.

YANBU

If I split from my husband, I would not bother dating one again. Rather be single.

Its perfectly possible to have sex with someone after only the smallest of small talk with no exchange of opinion about anything that matters and no opportunity for either to bore, patronise or offend the other. Also for there not to be a 'next morning'. I'd imagine that's the sort of situation the poster was talking about, and believe there would be men who would be agreeable to that.

@safetyfreak and others who would stay single if ”something would happen” to your marriage or husbands:

Why not get divorced now?
I mean man/men and marriage most have some worth or bring something worth having into your lives if you all chiose to keep being married?

Do you know what it’s actually like to be single year after year, decades?
Because I do, it’s not fun.

I suspect they're like us in that they're happy with their marriage but wouldn't go though the whole dating thing again. I would like to think we still have a good few years left together but in the event of one of us passing there's enough going on to fill the days.

Oh, that makes sense, thanks bigfatliar.

There are benefits to having your children's father at home.

If this thread is one of the worst you’ve seen on mumsnet you must either be new around here or an exceedingly delicate flower.

What’s getting your goat, the bits about men being responsible for the vast majority of violent and sexual crime and the vast majority of historical oppression, both of women and each other? Is that hate speech or is is just fact? You can’t argue with facts. Are you in the business of censoring facts you think are a bit mean to men’s feelings?

Or are you okay with women saying facts like the above; but not with women saying men are often boring, narcissistic and annoying? I mean, seems a bit bland really. Hard to think of that as hate speech. I guess they’re not actual proven facts though. So is it these statements you don’t like? Women’s opinions?

If I were a man I’d rather it be thought that men were a bit narcissistic and mansplaining than that men were responsible for the vast majority of historical violence and oppression.

But hey ho! I guess saying men are often boring and self-centred and not very nice to women and maybe often kind of twattish, is absolutely TERRIBLE, hate speech, incitement to violence and all that, just EXACTLY LIKE AND EQUIVALENT TO men perpetrating sexist and misogynist violence and oppression all throughout history and all over the world.

How awful of us, we must self flagellate immediately on the handmaidens’ orders, and be thoroughly ashamed of ourselves, because god knows saying men can be boring is terribly sexist and just like the make violence that women experience all the time. Anyone who has what used to be called a sense of perspective, clearly actually just has no conscience about the vast social oppression men as a class are subject to.

@DustinsHat

What? Benefits to having a man in the home

Surely not

@Shyzebra I totally agree! Even DH says that I am temperamentally much more suited to being a lesbian. As men go he is pretty brilliant, but if I could consider a decent sex life with a woman, I'd be off 😂