I have outgrown men

[Namechanged007]

Before all the namalt brigade come along I'm well aware.

Thing is it's true I have outgrown the ridiculouness and childishness of men.

I'm married but even so I feel like I'd be better off alone most of the time. Nothing wrong with dh as such but I'm more able and stronger alone.

I have just been to the pub and all the women were complimentary of each other. Going with the flow. And enjoying themselves. The men were either grumpy or showing brovado. There was an incident on our table that involved new men intimidating each other and I just went home.

The thing is this isn't a table of young men. It's professionals and grown ups. I just cant be bothered with it.

None of the women got involved but it spoilt the night.

I told dh I don't have time for such pathetic behaviour.

It never ends. It doesn't matter how old or wise we become men seem to revert back to this strange behaviour.

I deal with it day in day out at my work and I simply can't be bothered. If I never had to see another man, mansplaining, dominating conversation, throwing their weight around, bravado, dick measuring, causing a scene in my life it would be too soon.

Absolutely done with it.

I felt the same, fed up with childish behaviour so got divorced and loving being on my own. Will never remarry but I still get irritated with men in every day life, it’s a pattern and just how they are I guess. I think most women accept and put up with it because they don’t want to be alone.I’ve also moved around a lot and have always made friends.

And yet many women have yet to clock on to men's inadequacies. It is like something is wrong with us for choosing to not have a man in our life. Sadly these women who still depend on a man for happiness are very much in the majority.

Then when they get older their aches and pains/ trouble using online banking/ forgetfulness / plonker that pulled out in front of them on the road / female MPs gives them a prime excuse to be grumpy and unpleasant to be around.

I genuinely don't know why the men on these threads and the 'mothers of sons' get so excited.
Yes, some of the comments have been insulting to men. Women may be laughing at you, offending you, dismissing you.
But really, there's nothing to fear here. We can't hurt you.
You (and your son) will still be able to walk the streets without fear of being molested. Go for a drink without being sexually harassed. Your sex will still hold the power positions in society. You will still be likely to earn more than us. There will for some time to come still be women who have internalised misogyny and will fawn around you, protect you, excuse you, facilitate you.
If you're a man who doesn't recognise his own life in the above, if you don't enjoy the power, success and acclaim that other men do, who doesn't feel privileged, yes, the comments here might feel like punching down. But your anger towards the women expressing them is misplaced, as its not us who are keeping them from you.

Couldn’t agree more. Absolutely wish I was gay but just can’t find women attractive as more than friends. Hope my DD is gay or at least bi to give her more choice when she is older. Very rarely met straight men I really respect who aren’t sleazy or entitled or annoying. I appreciate they are out there, but needle in a haystack is what comes to mind.

Of course he would

A woman who posted last week that she only has male friends as she finds women hard to get on with had 100's of comments calling her a misogynist and it wasn't nearly as awful as this post

Deep breath.

None of this applies to my DH, his friends (well, most of them, who are absolutely lovely), so I’m not taking it personally, at all. Nor the men in my family, and even the majority of my friends’ DHs.

If this doesn’t apply to you - or any of them men you’ve come across in life - all good.

Amazing how personally wounded some of the women on here come across.

Amazing how personally wounded some of the women on here come across.

Most girls are raised to only see the good in men, to be good girls and protect men and their egos.
So if other woman goes rogue, they loose their minds and their brains can’t compute if few women speak the truth.
All women are supposed to fall in line.
Look how many screams misandy (it’s not an actual thing), no one is trying to take men’s rights away.
And do these same people call out misogyny?
Of course not.

Most girls are raised to only see the good in men, to be good girls and protect men and their egos.

Just curious, given that most primary care givers are women and that the vast majority of primary school teachers are also women how is this nefarious patriarchal agenda being asserted in these female dominated environments?

"open your textbooks to chapter 4: How to protect men and their egos"

@Annieisalright you have continually insulted and named called posters on this thread. I have already reported a few of your comments due to the name calling. Any point you make thereafter is pointless and forgotten. Everyone will only remember or respond to the abuse. You can argue a case without lowering to insults. Your clearly passionate about the topic and that's fine but showing it in the way you are takes away any credit, intelligence or interesting information you may have had. It's sad to see a woman attack others over something we have in common.

Wow this thread has been so interesting so far. I started it after a frustrating moment and have kept upto it all day. Still stand by and feel the same and it's refreshing to see the majority of others do too.

I 100% know that if I split with my DH I would never ever have another relationship ever again. I would be blissfully happy just me and my son, and when he eventually moved out then I’d be blissfully happy on my own.
@Namechanged007 I agree with everything you say. I’ve had a titful! I am 42 so witnessed a lot of shitty behaviour over the years.
My DH is a good one and I know there are none (at least where I live) like him so I would choose to be alone.
I remember being in my 20s and realising that men were bitchier than women and I was totally shocked as it was always sold as the other way around.

"Men need women more than women need men, but it's the supreme trick of the patriarchy to convince women of the opposite."

This is so so true. I am a divorced single mum of two teenagers. Since my divorce multiple men have tried to start something with me, and I felt an inate resistence to this. It really confused me for years because the type of men who were doing this were definitely the type who I would have been interested in in my younger years (good personality, sense of humour, solvent and employed etc) but I just felt an instinct to resist. Most men took that at face value and did not persist.

But deep down I felt guilty and a real sense of "what is wrong with me?"
Only now, years on, I have got to a sense of peace about not wanting to be in a romantic relationship and I have stopped thinking about myself that I am lazy or bitter but more that it is simply not worth it 99.999% of the time. If you have your own place, your own income, and you have made your life the way you want it, it would have to take an exceptionally special man for me to contemplate re arranging any of that for him.

Misandry is not a problem on a societal level the way misogyny is.

However to suggest it doesn't exist is just ridiculous.

YABU

The MN hypocrisy is strong on this post

Don't ask them to use logic

It will end in tears

I am living proof sexuality isn’t a choice, I’d never choose to be heterosexual.

😄😄
I think this is truest thing I’ve ever read!
I think many women think this way.

Amazing how personally wounded some of the women on here come across.

Pretty sure some of these women are actually men. 😁The time and energy investment of certain posters on here to chide a few women for choosing a life without men is interesting. How can these women's choices possibly affect them? Something deeply rankles, obviously.

I thank god every day that I am a lesbian. Men are utterly irrelevant to me, and I feel sorry for the sheer numbers of straight women yoked to inadequate men. The biological clock has a lot to answer for. I wonder, if that was taken out of the equation, how many women would choose a man-free existence?

Absolutely they're men. Everytime a thread comes up where men are discussed in less than flattering terms, it's like an alarm goes off and they all trot over yelling 'misandry' (and very little else. Never any real counter argument or debate.)
I'd love to know what they think it achieves as all they do is reinforce the negative stereotypes that they're so offended by.

@5128gap

Do you not think it's a little sad to think anyone with a different view to yours is a man?

When I saw people laugh about posters doing this I thought they were making it up

But seems you do really exist on here

Nobody is chiding anybody for choosing a life without men

Some people have make sweeping, negative generalisations about men that others have strongly disagreed with.

A man would be called a misogynist for saying/posting that.

I am awe of your fearless honesty. So unlike those duplicitous men.

Bit curious as to how it works in practice though. When you meet some attractive potential sex partner you presumably employ some patter - without revealing that you hate , loathe and despise him.

Or do you tell him beforehand than he is an irredeemable creep and leave it up to him?

Either way takes great skill I imagine!

I've dated men and women. Lesbian relationships are not any easier. People are challenging.

No. My partner, dad, brother, cousin and grandad are the complete opposite of every bad thing on this thread. Yes there are horrible men. There are also horrible women and I'd rather take them on their own merits.