DH has no time for our dog

[PokeInTheBum]

A few years ago DH said he wanted a dog, a German shepherd. I said no as I didn’t want the hair or a large animal to have to look after. He kept on about wanting a dog and assured me that he’d be 100% responsible for it. I said if he was that desperate for a dog he could get a little one like a French bulldog. He reluctantly agreed and we got a frenchie puppy. At first he adored him and was with him all the time. He took him to a basic obedience 6 week course and would come home frustrated saying the dog wouldn’t do anything and he was a laughing stock at the class. He was working on stuff with him inbetween classes (daily) but would always come back furious from the class saying it was pointless. I started going with him for support but to be fair it was embarrassing, ours was the only dog that wasn’t progressing and we couldn’t get him to do anything other than “sit” and even that was only 50/50. Didn’t help that the instructor made jokes about it and drew everyone’s attention to it. At the end of the course everyone was presented with their certificates whilst we were “gently told” to book onto a repeat course.

DH decided against it and whilst he continued walking the dog etc it was obvious that he was losing interest. We couldn’t get him house trained, he was incredibly destructive and wrecked everything in sight. We had a behaviourist in as well as a trainer but neither have been any help.

Then 3 years ago DH told me he needed a proper dog and was buying a German shepherd puppy. I agreed because I saw how much it was getting him down not having this dog. He was going to all sorts of shows, displays and meet ups etc for 2 years prior.

we got the German shepherd. DH finally has the dog he wanted. It excelled at the basic obedience class and then went on to pass the advanced obedience class and all the kennel club awards. DH’s office is full of certificates and rosettes from him activities with the dog and to be fair he does 100% of the work with her.

Trouble is his tolerance for the frenchie is now rock bottom, he gets annoyed just hearing him wander around the house. He refuses to clean up its piss and shit saying he’s not “doing it anymore” with a 6 year old dog. To be honest I think he actively dislikes the dog.

I have taken on responsibility of the frenchie but the way DH makes it so obvious he doesn’t want him around upsets me. He’ll literally make the frenchie move off the sofa so the German shepherd can sit there.

We ended up arguing about it last night and he said it’s my fault as I pressured him to get a dog he didn’t want and if I’d just agreed to the shepherd in the first place none of this would have happened.

So, is it all my fault??

I agree with him. You should have let him have the dog he wanted in the first place . He looks after his. You should look after the one you chose.

Cocklodged 😂 they bought the dog! They chose to go to a backyard breeder and buy a damaged dog, it hasn’t snuck into their house. They brought it. They therefore have responsibility for it.

Faseeahes I'm not sure what you mean by 'oh the irony'. If you think the way her husband is treating the dog isn't cruel that's your opinion.

What are you talking about, you fruit loop? A man who doesn’t contribute and lives off you is entirely different to a dog you bought! Unless you have some weird notion that the dog will bring in an income. You buy a dog and take on the responsibility of raising it and all the costs involved.

But I do look forward to seeing you suggest PTS instead of LTB on the next cocklodging thread.

This thread has enraged me. I have a rescue French bulldog, as well as two rescue mutts.

The Frenchie is the most loving, biddable, sweetest dog I’ve ever owned. House training took a couple of months (we got her when she was 3.5, and she’d been living in a mass kennel with 40 other Frenchies and American bulldogs) but it wasn’t hard at all.

Please get in touch with a French Bulldog rescue group in the UK. They will gladly take her off your hands and get her the home she
deserves.

@angieloumc what is he doing that is cruel to the dog?

I think you both sound horrible and I hope you never get any more pets. Dogs deserve better than you.

Op, think you should do the right thing an just accept Frenchie isn’t a good fit for your family - be kind and rehome. Both for their sake so they can have a few years left of feeling wanted by someone who really likes them and also the sake of your marriage! Fingers crossed for you to find someone x

www.fortheloveofourfrenchies.net Rehome your Frenchie via this.
Then rehome your stupid husband.
And never own another dog. You’re not cut out for it.

If you read the OP's posts you'll see how he treats the dog. In my book it's cruel but maybe not in others views.
Faseeshes whatever you say. Just hope you haven't got any pets.

And never own another dog. You’re not cut out for it

OP is kind to the dog and has previously owned Labs. Stop frothing.

She grew up with labs, that's not the same thing.

Wonder how many people who are so so angry have lived with a dog for six years that just shits and pisses where it wants. They tried to train this dog for three! Years before he got the dog he actually wanted. They did group training as well as getting two other trainers involved but yes they are both Clearly evil dog owners. The dh from what I read tried hard for a long time to train this dog and wasn’t just grumpy that it was the right dog only grumpy that it never seemed to learn anything ever.

Frankly the dog sounds as smart as a blade of grass. I feel bad that the poor sod even exists and not because of his owners because because of the idiot who clearly bread this dog so poorly it’s been deemed untrainable by three lots of professionals.

It's mainly the fault of the stupid man. Although the OP was also somewhat at fault--she should have put her foot down and said NO to any kind of dog, and definitely to a second dog.

I do feel like dogs can be a bit of a feminist issue. I know sometimes it's the woman who wants and loves the dog, but I know several marriages where the husband and/or son(s) whined and whinged non stop about wanting a fucking dog, the woman finally caved and agreed to getting one, then before you know it, the blokes have lost interest, or only want to do the "fun" bits like take it for a walk on a nice day. The mopping and hoovering, the getting dog smell out of everything, the feeding arrangements, the walks in horrible weather, the logistics of what to do with the dog during holidays, all ends up being done by Mum.

Dogs should not come into a house unless everyone wants one!

she should have put her foot down and said NO to any kind of dog, and definitely to a second dog.

But he does everything for the second dog

Rehome thé husband.

If the OP isn't biddable enough is he going to replace her too?

I hope these two have no kids.

Seriously though that poor French bull dog needs a home where all owners welcome it.

Yes, this. The poor Frenchie knows he's not loved or wanted and is very stressed. What a terrible life it's having. Please, rehome him with a loving, kind family who love and understand the breed.

Faseeshes my comment about reading the OP's posts was to Porcupine not you. Your definition of 'cruelty' is obviously different to mine.

I'm not sure it's that easy? Dog shelters are full, an untrained 6 year old dog isn't easy.

It's their responsibility, not that get rid because it's not worked out how they wanted.