To think some Mumsnet advice is crap?

[Crapadvice]

Lighthearted.

Lots of very good suggestions, kindness, support, not knocking anyone, just having a laugh here.

But there are a few tired old nuggets that keep finding their way onto threads.

Theres the super aggressive, over the top advice, like someone who is mildly annoyed with their husband has to SIT HIM DOWN. why does this always involve sitting him down, like a dog.

Ear plus or headphones as the answer to any excess noise. Does it not occur to people that we need to hear other stuff for a reason?

No, as in no is a complete sentence. No it isnt. I think my friend is a MNetter, I asked if she was free for coffee a couple of months ago. She said ‘no.’ I haven’t asked since!

what’s the worst advice you’ve seen on here?

Fine whatever .

To the topic of the thread, one thing that bothers me is the 'be the bigger person' and ignore being treated badly by siblings, family or friends. There was a thread a little while back where someone owed them 400 pounds, they then owed other person 100, they say take it out of the 400 you owe me, CF goes batshit and demands the 100 now. Posters say 'pay it up, be the bigger person', which is just creating CFs.

I hope the reason he's an "Ex" was because he said that! Fucking abusive git. If you stayed with him you would have ended up in a ditch I'm telling you, a fucking ditch! You have no idea of what a man like that is capable of! I could tell you some stories.... Despicable behaviour

(This was in jest btw - feel the need to clarify everything on mumsnet)

I once asked someone a simple favour and the response I got was a simple No.

Which seemed pretty harsh but I want gonna pursue it.

Anyway what he actually meant to write was NP but it had autocorrected 😂

I think that sometimes people are in a rush but feel bad about 'reading and running' or whatever the pop

Sorry, whatever the popular MN phrase is so sometimes the advice can be a bit underwhelming because people haven't got time to offer more than a sentence.

I never feel bad about reading and running. They don't know, it hasn't hurt anyone's feelings and if I don't know what to say, best I say nothing.

I find a lot of the money saving tips threads strange and in reality either don’t work or save so little money and end up taking so much effort.

There was one a few years ago where someone was recommending fasting as a cure for diabetes. They made no differentiation between type 1 and 2.

The ones where the OP hasn't enough money to last the month for food, so posters say to grow their own veg.

Think the OP is after more of an immediate solution than having to wait 6 months for a crop of potatoes to grow.

You are joking! That is seriously dangerous advice!

Some people have no idea about poverty, I'm sure in the long run cooking everything from scratch saves you money ,but if you have a tenner to last a few days you need to make the money stretch and not waste it on different herbs and spices etc ,so can understand why people go for cheap pizzas ,chicken nuggets etc aa it's filling.

It waa pretty common outside of MN as well. I lost it with someone irl I know when they were going on about intermittent fasting etc being cure for diabetes. They had no idea it wasn't just 1 diabetes but more types🙄

Problem neighbour? Just move house. Because it’s really easy and cheap to move house and not disruptive to children’s schools and people’s jobs at all.

Live rurally and the bus fare is too expensive? See above! Or, just by an e bike. They’re only a thousand quid.

Been stood up or ghosted by a man? Write him a really long text message about how you don’t give a fuck anyway. That’ll really show him he was wrong about you.

Been fucked over by a CF? Suck it up and seethe silently. They may think they’ve got away with it, but at least you’ve got the moral high ground and can claim being the ‘bigger person’. To whom, I don’t know. And if the CF happens to be your step child’s parent then you signed up for it, so better get used to your life of servitude.

Your husband has put on five stone and you no longer find him attractive? It’s okay to leave a relationship for any reason. Not being sexually attracted to someone is a fair enough reason.

You’ve put on five stone and your husband mentioned it the other day? He’s a fucking cunt and should love you and want to rip your clothes off at any size.

Your husband is verbally, emotionally and financially abusive, but you’re on holiday with him in a five star long haul destination right now? Shut up moaning and enjoy the holiday that so many other people don’t get to have.

Husband is unbelievably selfish and plays golf/goes on 100km bike rides/sails to the channel islands and back six nights a week? Spa day. That’ll show him.

Thank you.

I really think that type 1 diabetes and type 2 diabetes should have clearer clarification about the differences. I was completely ignorant about type 1 until I didn't have that option anymore.

This isn't because of judgement about type 2 btw, both are serious conditions.

They have some distinct differences that people don't consider or realise, and advice on fasting for all diabetics just blows my mind (I don't give advice on things I know nothing about so I would NEVER have said that).

A lot of people giving advice on things they don't know about on here!

There are actually more than 2 types as well... which I have been reading up on a bit. That was news to me as well!

THIS

”My sibling/father/mother/pil want me to run myself through a flattening machine so as to make myself a more welcoming doormat (they find the lumps off-putting). I’m not sure though. AIBU?”

’YABU, but faaaaaaamily/ I would do it OP, be the bigger (flatter) person and keep the peace’

Nevermind that OP is already the bigger person by virtue of not being a piss taking CF, she has to prove it by giving the CF exactly what they want. Fucking batshit.

Meanwhile, currently trending on MN, there's a thread where a woman wants to know whether she should reevaluate her friendship because friend got her (friend's) baby's ears pierced.

Well good for you if you won't tell someone to leave their partner but what you're not getting is that's your values. And they don't trump other people's.

Of course we judge people and situations all the time. It's disingenuous to say we don't. People are actually posting because they want another person's perspective. I've learnt an awful lot about other people's views and values from this website. It's been a refreshing change from just hearing the views of the people who I grew up with or live around.

And sometimes it's not shitty to say my standards are higher. It would be if you were just doing it to lord it over someone. But more often than not it's to try to get across the idea that people don't have to put up with their partner's crap behaviour. In that case it's certainly okay to say that your husband doesn't speak to you like that and you wouldn't put up with it.

In fact I've read a number of people who've come back to thank everyone after leaving a bad relationship. I've never heard anyone come back and say they were given terrible advice and they bitterly regret leaving.

What you're saying is terrible advice is often not true on any subjective assessment. What you really mean is you don't agree with it. Well I imagine I'd rarely agree with you. That doesn't make either of us a better person, so that's a red herring frankly designed to close down debate.

This is just an invention.If you posted these issues you might get some people suggesting these things but you'd also get far more empathy and helpful advice.

If you think it's all so crap, why do you read the threads. That's really weird to spend so much time reading things you think are a waste of time.

Oh you mean they want to sneer. Well I'm not interested in their point of view in any case then.

I see who the defensive people are on here and their 'advice' over the years

Yes this forum is largely for comedy value to be honest.

Well you've just outed yourself as one of the sneery types. Well done!