DH accepted a new job offer 100 quid less per week but says it will eventually advance his career...

[Cruella78]

DH went back to college & studied a field related to his career... He recieved a job in his new field but the salary is 100 quid less per week that we can't afford!! He says that the salary will increase & also that he will have greater earning potential I the future... Aibu to feel uneasy about this? It feels risky.. His old salary was 80k per year & I am a sahm as I don't want to pay a fortune in childcare & we have no family support...

Same 🤭sign me up

There's no reason they should have to cut it down. They're at school and you can work.

Midday supervisor at a local school would make up the different pretty easily.
Working as a 1:1 TA in a primary school if you have the interest; schools struggle to fill those roles, and they're term time.

Or look at your local big grocery stores.

Good luck OP, you'll feel a lot better once you've actually started applying and getting interviews.

Jakers what do you do all day. I would have gone mad with boredom. Do get an education of some kind now the kids are at school.

You could do a higher degree apprenticeship so you earn money while studying for a degree.

As you've been out of work for a few years, enrol for an access course & an IT course at your local college. There's loads of online and in person courses available for people like you. There's also, lots of remote admin type jobs available as well. I work from home and it fits in with my children perfectly.

You are putting yourself in an extremely vulnerable position by being a sahm. You've become accustomed to a certain lifestyle that you can't afford to maintain by yourself. You are dependent on your dh and what would happen if he wasn't in your life anymore? You need to start earning for yourself and pay into a private pension.

It's an enhancement qualification not an original one

Op there are schemes now specifically aimed at helping women who have taken longer career breaks to get back into work.

Open University Access course

You are taking the criticisms pretty well OP so I suspect that rather than being an entitled madam, you are throwing up all these barriers, worrying about the drop in 10k etc at least partly because you are scared of change, scared to get out there in case you fail, maybe even scared that your husband is sort of 'showing you up' with HIS get up and go. All the more reason to get up and out there yourself OP, to build your own identity and self worth and yes, income. I have no doubt you are contributing enormously to your families well being as you are but there is more in you than you are currently allowing. You have the luxury of having the time, supportive husband and income to re-train, to ease yourself into something or even to do voluntary work that might lead to paid work.

Care work is flexible and fits with family life, you often don’t need experience

I think it’s time for you to get a job Op

you’ll likely enjoy it too as you won’t just be ‘’mum’

as well as earning some money, it’s about investing in yourself

You will be able to manage , look on some of the frugal blogs , instagram etc there are lots of ideas . It's hard work menu planning and looking for bargains but if you are not in work it can be done.

So go back to retail.

There are always jobs going on the tills or stacking shelves, and most supermarkets will offer you set days, part-time/school hours if you ask at interview. When I worked in ASDA, there were loads of people who did school hours around their kids - 9.30-2.30 through the week, that would make you probably double the £100 a week your husband is losing.

It's all relative. If you're paying a mortgage on a flat in London, keep a car, and have a loan to repay, for example, a salary like that can be quickly eaten up.

oh come on OP. No reason you can't work a part time job. My friend was a sahm for nearly 10 years (3 kids) she volunteered for a year to increase her chances of getting paid work then got a job when her youngest started school. It's not impossible. In 3 years time your youngest will be able to walk home by themselves

Well done him. You should be very proud that he wants to progress and has goals.

The net loss if you are gaining pension contributions and health insurance is probably quite small although in weekly cash you will notice it.

Look for work which will increase your confidence, even if its volunteering initially or doing some study. You had a decade or more experience before children in retail, you could consider school related jobs. Honestly just start with something and you will soon wonder why you were worried.

Once settled into a starter job think about the next 25 years - you are quite young enough to train to do something more demanding as your children grow and become more independent. Maybe move up the ladder in retail, maybe train in education or maybe something else entirely. Its really not uncommon for people to retrain to something new at your age!

Get a grip and find a job, any job will do in your situation

I was kinda right though. Turns out there's expensive hobbies to fund. Which makes sense as I cant see a half decent husband taking a drop in salary that meant they couldn't afford the mortgage and the bills.

Anyway I do evenings in retail it's a pain in the arse but it does avoid having to pay child care. And there seem to be alot of part time positions in retail about. They haven't fired me yet amd I'm certainly not a catch employee wise.

Dealing with kids is good practice for dealing with customers op 😉

Get a job
Simples

Fucking hell, your children are 7 and 10. Get a damn job!

If you can't absorb a £60 a week cut on that kind of salary, then you've got bigger problems!

This really feels like a troll post however here's my opinion.

Unless you have crippling debts, you'll survive. Sounds like a great opportunity for your DH and he's lucky to be being paid so well considering he doesn't have experience in this field.

As others have said, why don't you find a part time job around the kids to make up the difference? I'm sure DH will greatly appreciate it.

I rang a recruitment agency there to have a chat as I saw some remote customer service roles advertised. They were really nice & helpful so I need to do up my cv & send it in.