Daughter getting married, husband invited 2 families to stay in our house

[CakeFiend8]

Am I being unreasonable to think that my husband inviting two families to stay in our house the week of our daughter's wedding is a bit much? To put it mildly.

The two families consist of his niece + husband + 2 children, and his sister-in-law and their two children. And no, we don't have any spare bedrooms, so my husband said we will give one family our bedroom while we sleep wherever there's a couch, and the other family will take the front room with a sofabed. Any other time, fine - but it's the week of our daughter's wedding which will surely be chaotic just waiting for the bathroom in the morning with 11 people in the house! I want to bury myself in a hole somewhere and cry...

It's adding to my daughter's anxiety, who is already stressed out with wedding plans, and me, as mother of the bride, I'm having kittens!

Please let me know if I'm over-reacting...

Find a hotel with two rooms or a suitable suite. Give him 24 hours to cancel or you will be making a reservation for the week for you and daughter.

If OP needs to send the message, the one above is perfect (also because need to use 'vi' as formal given OP doesn't know them). Perhaps mention the fact there's only one bagno, too! Basically lots of polite, super flowery language to explain in a very apologetic way why they can't stay.

Absolutely not and as a guest I would not want to put my hosts out in this way. He needs to tell them now that there is not enough room for even 1 extra family with kids never mind 2. You also do not need to added extra hassle of tidying and worrying about them. Get him told.

Do the two families know about each other staying?

Do they know what the sleeping arrangements will be? Have they stayed in your house before?

Have they definitely said yes? Or have they said something which he has taken as meaning 'yes we'll stay'? And now he doesn't want to go back to them to confirm?

If there is any way that you can communicate directly with his niece and sister-in-law, I would do it. Is there any other member of his family who speaks good English?

Absolutely you aren’t over reacting.

I’d be furious, however I’d book a nice hotel room for the duration, and watch my anger dissipate ☺️

Either he pays for you and DD to get a hotel for the week or you tell them he has fucked up. Hid choice.

two words for you, OP.

PREMIER. INN!!!

Tell him to sort it out or there will be divorce before the wedding.

Hugely inconsiderate of him.

What a twat

If OP needs to send the message, the one above is perfect (also because need to use 'vi' as formal given OP doesn't know them). Perhaps mention the fact there's only one bagno, too! Basically lots of polite, super flowery language to explain in a very apologetic way why they can't stay.

I'd book a cottage or something nearby. Let him host. Look after your daughter.

My DH got roped into having a school friend to visit (friend doesn't like me) , who bought his casual boyfriend. I went to my mum's & left him host. I don't think he'd had a scooby how hard food was to produce until then plus be chatty, etc..

He's nuts. Book yourself and your daughter into a hotel ( even a Travelodge) and leave him to it.

I'm not sure why posters are so fixated on booking a hotel on his credit card. They are married. The debt is joint. The family will pay for it, not him.

That said, OP you should absolutely book to go somewhere else if that's what you and your daughter want.

You and dd move to hotel or airbnb. Book it now. Leave him to his relatives.

This made me lol. I don’t understand it all but got the gist. There’s a better worded one upthread with the English first. I’d send that one. But tell him you’ve sent this one.

Sorry OP I read the first few lines and couldn’t read any more. Flat out no!!! If his family turn up turn them
away. It’ll be DH fault for not telling them no room in the inn. How dare he defy you. I would not give up my matital bed for anyone. If hes a problem with that tell him where the door is and don’t come back.

I think I'd kill him.

So, your husband has agreed to host them. So is he going to be cleaning the bathroom each day @CakeFiend8 - as will be needed with so many in one house? After he has cleaned the house thoroughly in advance, done the food shop and planned all meals he will be cooking for his guests?

I have amended the message to this:

So che X ti ha invitato a casa nostra per il matrimonio di nostra figlia, ma come molti uomini non ci ha pensato. Purtroppo non abbiamo una camera per gli ospiti e un solo bagno, quindi non ci sarebbe spazio per ospitarvi comodamente e rischierete di trovare tutto molto scomodo. Per tua comodità, ti propongo un hotel, o un Airbnb, nelle vicinanze e sarò felice di aiutarti a trovarlo.

The English translation is this:
I know that X invited you to our house for our daughter's wedding, but like many men he didn't think about it. Unfortunately we don't have a guest room and only one bathroom, so there would be no space to accommodate you comfortably and you risk finding everything very uncomfortable. For your convenience, I propose a hotel, or an Airbnb, nearby and I will be happy to help you find it.

Agree with others, book yourself a hotel and then maybe the implications of looking after 8 guests for a week will sink in. And if they don’t. then have a lovely and much less stressed build up to the wedding.

Definitely book a hotel for you and your daughter, it will be hilarious to watch him do all the donkey work of caring for guests

That is absolute madness. I can't believe the proposed guests don't see that as well!! I will be chaos. A friend described the morning of their wedding as "a whirl of women in bra and pants"

His options are very limited. Either he rescinds the offer or he hosts alone. Sadly you and DD will be staying at a hotel or airbnb that week. It would be ruinous T for the wedding party to be hosting families over the wedding day. He's being very foolish, thoughtless and unkind.

Book you and your daughter into a nice hotel that week and leave him to it!