CF Have come to stay - The morning after

[SeriouslyLosingTheWill]

The first thread is full so I'll start a new one, in case there is a dramatic update in the morning.

I actually feel emotionally drained right now. I keep almost crying. Pathetic. Probably the wine thats doing that.

I'll be going to bed shortly and i'll update tomorrow if theres anything to add. I reckon they will be up early and go quietly though.

They don't drive a ford ranger (I remember that thread! haven't looked at a ford ranger driver the same since!) Its a bmw something or other.

Dp cleared up the kitchen and 1 dc (dd19) came down and helped, so thats all good. She then came out, gave me a little hug and said DP had explained about the food. She then lit up and offered me a cigarette (WTF! I don't smoke and although had an inkling wasn't sure she did) and said no ones perfect, everyone has failings. Honestly i'm in a parallel universe tonight.

Dp has put most of the beers away in the garage, just left in the fridge what was there. I do wonder if they will take them home.

Heres the first one if anyone wants to catch up as not sure I can give a proper summery right now www.mumsnet.com/talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/4614982-cf-have-come-to-stay-how-to-handle-it?page=23&reply=119364945

"Suggested" is the key word here!

Hi all. Just dropping by to say that we don't allow trollhunting on the boards.
We've removed quite a few posts because they're taking the discussion off topic and not really helping the OP. As always, if you have concerns about a post or poster then please report to us - we're always fine to have a look behind the scenes.
MNHQ

@ifIwerenotanandroid brilliant 🤣🤣🤣

Wow OP I hope all is well. I’m astounded by these CFers.

Hopefully they’ve either snuck away before you got up OR have reflected overnight and are apologizing to you right now.

CF-ers = Croissant Flakers? 🙂

Reflected overnight? No way. The brass neck on these two will mean they are full of self-righteous indignation that will see THEM as the wronged party.

@SeriouslyLosingTheWill I'm in awe of you and your DP's handling of this.

I just hope they go quietly this morning and without any insults or drama.

I've just read the OPS posts on the old thread and now checking in to see what happens when they leave!😄

And the cutlery.

Hope you’ve got you place back now.

Wow OP well done. 👏 Have they gone now?

I'd put the croissants out on a plate and fancy butter in a dish so they can't take them with them.

I'd play today as if nothing had happened.

Wow 😯

Wow 😯

Have they gone yet OP x

I just read through your previous thread and this one. You're braver than I am. I'm a door-mat until I explode!

I hope you got some sleep and they ate well on there way home.

They have left!

We actually heard the car leave about 8ish and thought they had gone, but then it came back about 20 minutes later.

Dp then got up and went downstairs as we could hear them and I didn’t want to see them.

Anyway he can be back up after maybe 10 minutes and said they are leaving and would like to say goodbye to me.
He also said they had both apologised to him for the misunderstanding last night. Apparently they didn’t realise they were needed to help out because they were on holiday and holidays are meant to be to relax. Which I am still thinking wtf, but an apology is better than nothing even if it is more of an excuse.
They didn’t mention payment for the steaks again which is something.

So I reluctantly went downstairs to say goodbye which was really really awkward. They had gone and got a bunch of flowers and a small box of chocolates. Said how they had enjoyed their holiday and meeting me and catching up with dp again. And they finally said the word Thank you!
Nice as pie as though nothing was amiss.

Dp did offer them croissants but thankfully they refused! I am still angry at their wasted money on steak comment, so I just said a very bland good bye, have a safe trip and left them to it. I didn’t acknowledge the flowers or chocolates as they weren’t actually handed to me, just put on the kitchen table. They absolutely know I don’t like them.

But I don’t care, I am so relieved they have left.

I still can’t get my head around the not helping because it’s their holiday excuse. That’s fine if you’re at a hotel!

Still don’t know where that fits into us also paying everything for them. They are just very entitled people. Imagine being their work colleague! It would drive you mad.

We will never contact these people again, Dp was very apologetic to me and couldn’t believe what they had been like. He too was done with them pretty much after the restaurant thing. He doesn’t want anything to do with them from now on either.

So slightly boring update, no drama.
but they have left!!!!! Thank god!!!

I feel your pain OP...I had this but for weeks on end!
My husband had good friends, a couple with no kids, moving back from abroad and we offered our spare room for a couple of weeks while they found somewhere to stay. At that time, we had a 2-year old and a 5-month old so life was pretty hectic and also monotonous and myself and my husband were not getting much sleep. After 6 weeks, they hadn't even decided on a part of London to settle in, let alone started to look at flats.
They cooked once for us in 6 weeks. Didn't take us out for any meals or buy any food. I asked them once to babysit for a couple of hours so we could go to the pub at the end of the road for 2 hours and they said no, they were too busy. They didn't once clean their room or bathroom, and when I asked them to, they said, 'No, you have a cleaner - that's her job', despite the fact that we only paid her for 2 hours and she only really did the downstairs. I asked them to leave so many times. My husband did not back me up and I ended up walking out as I truly felt my mental health was suffering. I only ended up at my sister's house but I just had to get away. It made my husband realise how much it was upsetting me, but even after that, they took another week to move out! As they left, the woman said to me, 'That was quite a long time wasn't it...' It had been 8 weeks!! They then started texting my husband alone whereas before we'd had a group What's app. I want nothing to do with them now, which is a shame as my husband had known them for years. I wish I'd been much more direct and forthright with them and my husband, and I also wish we'd set a maximum time before they came. Lesson learned. So yes, I feel your pain!

Wow, glad they've gone. What terrible manners. Well done, OP, I know how hard these things can be.

Well I'm glad they got you a (small, begrudging) gift before leaving and actually said 'Thank you'. Bloody hell though - imagine going through life imagining that the rest of humanity owes you a good time for free? Horrible people. You handled yourselves well OP and with dignity.

And to those saying it was wrong to hide the wine and beer, after what they said last night I honestly wouldn't have put it past them to take it with them when they left, seeing it as their due when they'd (finally!) paid for it. Cheeky, cheeky fuckers of the highest order.

Glad they have gone with no drama. Enjoy some peace & quiet. Well done!

I must say, you've handled it brilliantly. I feel so sorry for you though, it's a horrible feeling being used. I hope they don't cause you any issues this morning. They genuinely sound like very selfish people, who would have stayed with you until they were told to leave.

Oh phew! So glad they're gone!
Well done OP

You (both) handled it excellently and don’t ever doubt yourself over it.

I think it’s normal to feel a little upset/low/reflect, when you’ve had to stand up for yourself especially in your own home.

They’re very practised freeloading arseholes and they knew EXACTLY what they were doing. They’ve probably got away with it loads of times. It’s like daylight robbery in your own home.

Funny how they really didn’t like a little taste of their own medicine!!

You should be very proud - onwards and upwards now 💐

Blimey. Just read the update on the original thread and the opener here.

Seriously impressed in the best possible sense, @SeriouslyLosingTheWill . You really put them in their place and did it firmly, with dignity and were nicer than they deserved.

I know real-life actions should not be taken solely to satisfy an online forum thread, but this one was satisfying. The gate-locked Ford Ranger one was an epic masterpiece but had a deeply unsatisfying resolution as the CF essentially got away with his CFery and invoked his poor wife into dealing with the fallout.

I was touched to read the DD's actions; fags aren't the best conduit of a parents' happiness, but it was brave to spark up in front of you and offer you one. I think that means you've achieved a good few "cool mum" points and that's her way of indicating that she's impressed.

Good for you OP. You were brave. These two really did need showing the door. Please don't feel guilty or bad - you were not the one in the wrong here. They might have stayed at least another week, abusing your hospitality and goodwill. It was nice to read that your DH backed you up as well. CFs can never understand or accept that their behaviour is CFerish, so I doubt contrition will be forthcoming, but be assured that you were in the right on this one.

Now you are a MN legend, and deservedly so.

I hope the CFs are on their way soon (if not already), never to return. And I wish them joy of their ill-gotten Clubcard Points. They can treat themselves to a thimbleful of petrol with them on the way home.

Enjoy the peace and quiet! Every good wish to you and your family OP. x

Apparently they didn’t realise they were needed to help out because they were on holiday and holidays are meant to be to relax

Yea that's bollox, they have pulled cfery their whole lives and will pay dumb when confronted that they ''didn't realise'', when everybody realises and understands social etiquette. They just choose to ignore it.