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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To speak to my neighbours about their shrieking children?

167 replies

Capricorn8990 · 17/08/2022 16:38

Now I don’t mind hearing children laugh, play and shout but I am really struggling with my neighbours children squealing and shrieking. I can’t even sit in my garden at the moment. My neighbour has her friend over most days who also has 2 children and they all squeal and shriek. This can go on for hours..

Neither adults ask them to be quiet and it’s really making me miserable cos we can’t even sit outside.

AIBU to speak to my neighbour about this? We get on well but not sure how I would approach it.

OP posts:
PurpleMarie · 17/08/2022 16:53

Another one? FFS.

converseandjeans · 17/08/2022 16:55

YANBU but I imagine you will get told you have to put up with it. I don't know how you deal with it tbh - they could surely go to a park or to the friends house.

stayathomer · 17/08/2022 17:00

Anyone else on this thread to make sure it’s not their children? Am spending the whole summer rushing out to shush the kids because I keep seeing the neighbours close their back doors and I panic. Nobody is winning here and the guilt is killing me, for the neighbours listening to us but also the kids trying to keep it down

Crunchymum · 17/08/2022 17:01

How old are the kids?

Jelly0naplate · 17/08/2022 17:03

Get them told to get their kids inside and sat Infront of a screen with a chocolate bar for 7 hours a day!

How dare they enjoy their garden and summer holidays!

🙄

Original poster
Capricorn8990 · 17/08/2022 17:03

@PurpleMarie sorry?

OP posts:
Original poster
Capricorn8990 · 17/08/2022 17:04

@Crunchymum between 5 and 8 I think..

OP posts:
Original poster
Capricorn8990 · 17/08/2022 17:05

@Jelly0naplate always one isn’t there.. obviously don’t expect that but there’s no need for constant squealing.

OP posts:
KatieKat88 · 17/08/2022 17:06

This makes me stressed! My DD is 2 (3 in a few months), not very shrieky generally and will quieten down when I tell her to when it's just us in the garden. But when her toddler friend is over (who is a screamer) my god they are loud. I do my best to get them to be quieter but it's hard when it's not your child and they are naturally loud! I try not to have them in the garden very often (once every couple of weeks) and meet elsewhere to spare the neighbours. So I think for me it depends on how old the kids are, how often it happens and for how long as to whether they're unreasonable or not.

Creepymanonagoatfarm · 17/08/2022 17:08

Honestly op I get you I really do. Ear buds changed my life...

Dobbysgotthesocks · 17/08/2022 17:08

Jelly0naplate · 17/08/2022 17:03

Get them told to get their kids inside and sat Infront of a screen with a chocolate bar for 7 hours a day!

How dare they enjoy their garden and summer holidays!

🙄

@Jelly0naplate there is a huge difference in asking for the children to be a bit quieter and them being inside on screens all day.

As a kid we spent a lot of time in the garden but we were never allowed to make ridiculous amounts of noise! 🤷🏻‍♀️ we were taught to be respectful of the people around us. Any stupid noise and we would be told off.

Far to many lazy parents who can't be bothered to appropriately discipline their offspring!

gamerchick · 17/08/2022 17:10

Ear defenders work wonders.

Fladdermus · 17/08/2022 17:17

I get it OP. We have neighbours on one side who have 4 kids and a pool and a trampoline, plus all their mates. They make an absolute racket and it doesn't bother me at all. It's noisy but it's just kids playing.

The neighbour on the other side however has 1 child who shrieks. All the bloody time. It does my head in. And yet they never stop moaning about the slightest peep out of anyone else.

Brigante9 · 17/08/2022 17:36

Drove me nuts when one of the neighbour’s children screamed, and I mean full on screamed at top volume for hours. I do not know how she didn’t just lose her voice. It did get to the point where we couldn’t have a door open so went round and said could they not keep her in to give us a break-no SEND, she’s now a delightful young woman. Apparently she also screamed indoors according to the other neighbour. It was because her much older sister used to make up impossible/unfair rules for the games and you could hear the protests building up to the screaming. I was delighted when the older sister moved out.

I absolutely love hearing the boys next door playing, they laugh, shout, splash round in their pool, get on really well, but I think constant screaming/squealing is unfair and impacts a heck of a lot of people. We were hauled indoors if we made too much noise as kids.

abovedecknotbelow · 17/08/2022 19:22

If my kids scream or shout they got brought in, I can't bear it never mind anyone else. They know it's not acceptable so they don't do it.

wonderingwhatsnext · 17/08/2022 19:37

I'm a childminder and don't allow screaming or shrieking in the garden. The children still have loads of fun, laughing, talking etc. They get one warning and then have to come in for a bit. Of course they should be having a good time but also learning that their behaviour impacts other people.

Clymene · 17/08/2022 19:44

I bellow SHUT UP!

Seems to work. I don't mind the noise of children playing at all but high pitched screaming is not ok

rainbowmilk · 17/08/2022 19:45

Read this wondering if you live near me - there’s been garden shrieking since 3pm and I’m hoping and praying it’s dinner and bedtime soon…

YANBU but prepare for endless comments of “let children be children and enjoy their garden, the alternative is being sent down the mines”.

unicormb · 17/08/2022 19:47

It's. The. Summer. Holidays.

scrivette · 17/08/2022 19:50

I have one child that has a tendency to shriek, I am constantly out there telling him to stop and saying he has to come in if he can't stop so the neighbours are probably sick of him starting to shriek and me telling him to stop as well as me telling the others to be quieter!

IDreamOfTheMoors · 17/08/2022 19:50

I love hearing children play in their garden. So innocent and sweet.
To be fair, I’ve never been subjected to full-on shrieking for hours and can’t imagine how unpleasant that would be.
I guess it’s a matter of degrees. You’d think the mum would get a handle on it without having to be asked. Maybe she’s overwhelmed or something, or immune. Or she is beyond caring.

Ffsmakeitstop · 17/08/2022 19:52

There is absolutely no need to scream while enjoying yourself. Last Friday my dd who WFH asked me seriously if it was normal for kids to scream all day and I just told her no because her and her DBs never did. Funnily enough after son had been home about an hour he also asked me the same question.
This kid had been screaming from 9.00 am till 7.00 ,pm, but then her dad is a noisy fucker do she has to compete with him to be heard.

Ffsmakeitstop · 17/08/2022 19:55

It should 't matter if it's summer holidays screaming is not ok sen excepted.

StoneofDestiny · 17/08/2022 19:58

Why do some people think there are only 2 choices - screaming and shouting V screens and chocolate? Kids can play without shrieking! Parents can take their kids out to open spaces/parks where shrieking won't disturb anybody.

UWhatNow · 17/08/2022 20:02

Playing yes.
laughing yes.
gaming about and a bit of playful squealing yes.

But consistent shrieking is fucking awful. I don’t know how the parents put up with it - I can only conclude that they’re inconsiderate dipshits who throw their kids out in the garden to do what they like because they don’t give a shit about anything or anyone except themselves. YANBU.

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