To have a moan re: DH endurance sports event

[entropynow]

So I have to drive him for four hours to the event ( to save his energy), stay up for 24 hours straight feeding him drinks and energy bars every 40 mins then drive him back another 4 h after he's ( well we've) had a long sleep - he'll be too stiff to drive.
Grrrr. I am SO not feeling the supportive spouse vibe right now.
Moan moan moan sthu, I know. He swore that the last time was it, but I ought to have known better. What is it with fundamentally pointless ( imo) sports challenges?
And yes, if I don't go he can't do it - everyone brings their own support person/ team.

No thanks. Why are you doing this?

Then he shouldn't be entering if he can't do this shit on his own. Sounds like a selfish twat to me.

Ultra marathons? You need to tell him now if he wants to do another then find a buddy and they can take it in turns to be support staff v runner.

@Drivebye
Because for some unfathomable reason it means a lot to him and he's a very good H generally. And I said I would.

Why are so many women married to twats?

Make a weekend of it, stay in a nice hotel and tell him to sort his own energy drinks out

He's really not, he'd do anything for anyone. It's his big hobby (this sport not stupid endurance events generally)

Oh God, sounds beyond tedious. Sorry, no advice.

I assume he does stuff for you that equates to driving for four hours and staying up for 24 hours?

ODFOD

Personally I would have just said no.

I wouldn't take up a hobby that required me to stay up for 24 hours so I sure as hell wouldn't be doing it for someone else's.

Out of interest, why did you agree?

Is it Trailwalker or the three peaks? I’ve got a DH like this… it is very wearing. Not to mention the many ruined weekends while he “trains”

you said you would, even though the last time it was shit?

That's on you - so probably i'd say suck it up and say no to next time and mean it. Make it very clear this is the very last time.

I did this once, though. An ultramarathon over the Swiss mountains, overnight. I was tired, cranky, alone and at some of the checkpoints there were only a few people and no toilet, it was hard to navigate (before satnav etc) and i hated it.

So i said "nope" and DH had to find a different partner.

If he's a generally good husband I'd do it but I'd be expecting compensation i.e. a nice weekend away in York in a posh hotel with him saying how grateful he is for my support every ten minutes 😀

Why do you have to feed him? I’d have no problem with the driving as presumably he’ll be too sore and exhausted to safely drive himself home, but I don’t understand why he can’t feed himself 😅

Its never women who have these inconvenient hobbies is it?

Yes, lots. Attention all posters putting the boot in without knowing him.
I asked for an outlet, not a 'please bash my DH' thread thanks

He can't drive or feed himself? He doesn't need sport, he needs a doctor.

I mean, I do sport events. But I don't expect anyone to come along with me! And certainly not 'stay up feeding me', what the hell? I've done a 24hour bike race which involved some planning but you certainly don't bring others into it who aren't riding.

I don't think this would bother me, I would do this for my DH if it was infrequent and his passion. He would do the same for me.

So I have to

No you don't.

Just as a little experiment, how many of the 'support' people are female would you guess?

I'd probably be willing to do that once a year, perhaps twice, but only if I felt it was appreciated

If I felt taken for granted, it would be very different

Because they aren't allowed to stop. I mean technically they could set up tables but it would seriously hack things up for the whole event. I've done it before, I'm just not working up any enthusiasm.

I asked for an outlet, not a 'please bash my DH' thread thanks

but it's AIBU so you know the drill. And you did sign up for it even though you knew it was shit. More fool you.

I occasionally have weekend mountain biking or powerlifting events, but not literally every weekend, nor do I bring the DH as an assistant, so I expect there might be women who do do them but not to the extent it hugely impacts the family.

Meh I'd probably do it. EXCEPT the spoon feeding every 40 mins. Surely he can take on that part?

Well, everyone’s agreeing with you, it sounds shit.

Perhaps you can give us a list of pre-approved responses for your outlet.

These threads where people come on to vent about their annoying DH and then get massively defensive when people agree he is annoying are just a bit 🥱