Thanking strangers

[Wdib78]

I had a baby recently and 2 of my parents neighbours have bought a couple of outfits for my baby.

Bearing in mind I have never met either of these neighbours at all.

Before one had even brought the gifts round ( I was there when she brought it)
My dad said when you walk past just knock on xxxx door and show her DC
I said I'm not knocking on someone's door who I don't know to show them DC, that feels weird to me.

The other neighbour bought a couple outfits for DC and my dad said "next time you're round just knock on their door to say thanks"
He mentioned it again today while we were out for a meal and I said it makes me feel uncomfortable knocking on someone's door who I don't even know or met and say I'm your daughter, thanks for the stuff!
He said "well your mum can go with you"

I explained that If I was in that position in reverse if you passed on a thank you to me then that would do for me, I certainly wouldn't expect a personal visit.

His response " well you should!"
And slammed his glass down.

Even my mum was cringing, my DP can see how uncomfortable he's made me feel being so pushy with it.

Is it the norm to go round knocking on strangers doors because it feels awkward as hell to me and he knows I've always been painfully shy. I didn't want to kiss a waiter on holiday at 9 years old but he was adamant then that I should. I feel he has no boundaries. Or should I just do as I'm told?

They've gone to the trouble to buy your child a present. It would be perfectly normal to call on them to say thank you.

Have you actually chapped the door of someone who don't know to say thanks?

But why should she, when a thank you card will do the job?
Well it takes a couple of minutes to go round and say thanks, and you dintvhavecto ho out of your way to buy a card and its also free!

@notacooldad the norm these days is order a bundle of thank-you cards with babies photo or It's easy enough to pick them up at the supermarket.
It's not a huge hardship to go and get a thank-you card.

Have you knocked the door 🚪 of a stranger to say thanks?

Honestly I'd talk to a friendly face anywhere, at baby groups, school gates, bus stops but knocking a door like a cold caller would have me shaking in my boots.

But she doesn’t want to go round, she wants to give a card.

I don’t understand why people hate this so much.

*notacooldad the norm these days is order a bundle of thank-you cards with babies photo or It's easy enough to pick them up at the supermarket.
I know many people do that but just if she hasn't it 🤷‍♀️

Totally agree with this.

Given her Dad seems to be a bit of a bully his way or no way I think talking to him will be very difficult for the Op.

The poster who suggested the Stately homes thread probably has it right. She's a grown woman who is being bullied.

There has been a bit of a pile on in this thread, yes just knock the door. But I've asked a couple of times, has anyone knocked the door of a stranger to say thanks nobody has actually said yes.

I have, in this exact situation with my mum's neighbour who bought my PFB a present. I'm not an extrovert but felt it was the right thing to do. Took a few minutes & all done.

Can't speak re the Op's bully dad - I'm always sceptical about drip feeds that paint the Op in a more sympathetic light when the thread isn't going the Ops way.

Unless the Op is a full on keyboard warrior, she seems fully capable of telling people where to go & being rude & disrespectful when reading things she doesn't like. This means I tend to agree with those posters who have pointed out she's likely much more like her dad than she pretends to be.

Anyway, I couldn't actually give a shit. Be rude, not rude, say thanks in person or via a card - totally up to the Op. I'd be sceptical of seeing her on the Stately Homes threads though.

@JacquelineCarlyle

Can't speak re the Op's bully dad - I'm always sceptical about drip feeds that paint the Op in a more sympathetic light when the thread isn't going the Ops way.

Eh? Her dad sounds horrible in her opening post.

Anyway, I couldn't actually give a shit

So why are you posting?

Be rude, not rude

I don’t think OP had any intention of being rude to her neighbours. It’s posters here who are pretty rude to OP.

If your mum goes with you I don’t see the issue. It was very kind of them and perhaps they’d like to see the baby

I don't see why OP's parents can't just pass on the thanks when they next see their neighbours. 'Thank you for the clothes, Wdib loved them. Maybe next time she's here, pop over and see the baby.'
Much easier than her knocking on a stranger's door, or making a card for them. She has never laid eyes on them, never said hi in passing, the gift was more about the relationship between her parents and their neighbours than her and the baby.