to be sick to death of people thinking they have to tell me how awfully painful childbirth is?

[betterhalf]

I am now 39+3 weeks pregnant with my first baby, and people just delight in telling me the horrors of childbirth! Today I had someone who knows my Mum say 'Has anyone explained to you how terribly painful it will be for you?'
Well, thanks for that love, you've really cheered me up! I was feeling nice and calm about the impending birth, knowing I will have pain but feeling confident I can cope, and now my confidence has been shot! Grrrrr

A few, but nothing significant.

Oooh jolly goodluck bh (and interesting thread - not one I've seen before!)

I think both points are true kittywise. Yes, attitude and preparation can help with pain bearing. And yes, some births are a lot more bloody painful than others!
[Sorry betterhalf, I'm sure you'll be fine, will gag myself now. ]

I have had two births with just G&A (first not by choice) my labours are fast but extremely painful, no break in contractions just getting over one and another starts. I feel completely out of it like I am not in the room the pain completely takes over my body which just gets on with it. Everyone says I am so lucky to have a fast labour and I suppose I am. But I am dreading the pain and the feeling of being out of control again BUT (huge BUT) it is so so so so worth it.

Attitude does help alot. Iwas more prepared second time round and had a fine old time but the third one I hated. I had a different pregnancy to the first two which completely threw me and then I had a student midwife who was lovely but I had to go through every examinination twice because the experienced midwife had to check as well and the older midwife was horrible - this left me terrified and I'm sure that made it much worse than it had to be. Basically if you're having an ok pregnancy and you like and trust your midwife you should be ok. Although I do like the idea of preparing yourself for the worst ever experience in the world and it's bound to be alot better than you expected

Don't be so bloody arsey you lot.
I've had some really shitty labours, and I've had births where I've been terrified and know that it hurt a hell of a lot more. As I've given birth more often I've spent a lot of time working on techniques that work for me.

If it makes you all feel better to draw the conclusion that I just sneezed them out therefore I had no concept of real pain them think that way,

It's not the truth but it must make you feel better.

Ruty thanks for the sensible comment

fuck, it does hurt though, but at least you get a nice little baby at the end of it. Be a bit of an bummer if it hurt that much to remove a tooth!

Arsey? lol, that's rich

It hurts but is an amazing experience. I told DH 18 hours into my labour that 'IT F*CKING HURTS BUT I'LL HAPPILY DO THIS AGAIN...'

Well, it's not exactly comfortable...

The biggest shock for me was not the pain but the feeling of needing to poo. That was what I wish I'd been prepared for.

Well I did my long, OP labour with "just a little gas & air" and it wasn't out of choice and it was a complete and utter nightmare. Never EVER to be repeated. It affected mine and DS's relationship for months afterwards.

However, I do agree that fear does play a part. Being told I wasn't allowed any pain relief, even though I was patently in complete agony, made it ten times worse (if that was possible).

twinklemegan, why weren't you allowed any pain relief?

Message withdrawn

I think I got told that pethidine can't be given if they think you are close to delivery.
An epidural won't be given if you are dilated past 7cm or before established labour.
So depending on the hospital's policy and where you are up to in labour I don't suppose you would get much more than g&a or paracetamol.

ha! they misjudged how far along i was when they gave me an epidural. about 5 mins after, i transitioned! so epidural didn't really work. still used g&a.

next time i'll definitely ask for the epidural earlier...

Sorry , neither of mine hurt at all (both at home which I think helps). I either have a bucket fanny or am as hard as they come. I did apparantly say "oh that stings" when ds (10lb) crowned. Everybodys experience is different. Don't worry about it until you need to.

They took away my gas and air! But actually for me, and for that birth, it was the right decision - I couldn't focus with the G&A, felt too remote. The consultant came in (who we know and trust a lot), and smiled as he pushed away the cylinder! I called him a lot of names... But given that they'd been setting up for episiotomy, epidural and forceps, and he helped me deliver my big baby with only a minor tear, I forgive him everything. If it had been someone else, however, making that decision, I'd have been a lot more unhappy with it, so I think his presence made a big difference.

Well, due day is today and no sign of impending birth . Does period like pain/aches signify anything or is that just wishful thinking?

Its not so bad bh...if it were the human rce would ahve died out.

When I had my ds I just lay there afterwards thainking..."was that it then??" Really didnt see what all the fuss was about

can for some people! A friend of mine had what she said was like a bit of period pain, went into the hospital to get checked and was fully dilated!
If it persists ring your midwife. Good luck, nearly there!

oh dear, cant spell today...sorry!

I should also point out that I had a second degree tear and that..of course!.. it hurt, but you're having a baby fgs...its going to hurt!

My best tip would be to have no preconceptions about the sort of birth you want...if I had wanted G&A, pethidine or an epidural I would have had it, but I managed ok with just breathing and a TENS machine. Just go with the flow and do what is right for you.

Good luck x

By the time I got to the hospital I was already 6cms dilated with achy/period like pains!!!!

(Wouldnt leave the house before then as it was the last ever episode of Buffy that night so had to wait til it finished! )

Oooh, my labours both started with period pains. Sounds hopeful.