To be offended by a comment my friend made?

[creamysauce]

Hello :)

So I am getting a gorgeous French Bulldog puppy in a couple of weeks. I was discussing this with a very good friend of mine, about how I'm excited.. yadayada. So I then asked her "Would you ever get a dog or want to own a pet?". She immediately began to burst out laughing and said "No! I want to enjoy my life". A bit I asked "What do you mean by that?"- she then said "As I said it... I want to enjoy my life, owning a pet- particularly a dog, I wouldn't get the spontaneity back, I would be worried about leaving it in the house for too long, paying for this and that, having to take it for walks when I don't feel like it. Sometimes- out of the whim, I just want to book a holiday but with a pet, I will have to think about who is going to take care of it, dog sitters...I may get a cat as they are a bit more independent but still, a pet comes with a lot of responsibility".

I think subconsciously she is trying to sway my decision from getting a pet or do you think she's a tad jealous. I was a bit offended by her comment but she can be very out there/too honest for my liking. What do you all think?

Sounds like she just answered your question honestly

Sounds like a friend who is trying to help znd you don't like what she has to say. She's not wrong about any of it is she? If you love dogs that's fine but don't get it for the kids. Massive commitment in time money energy and tie you down.

Don't worry lots of empty nester get dogs so you will be in good company.

She isn’t jealous. I suspect she knows people will judge you for buying this breed.

Why would she be jealous for you getting something that she clearly doesn’t want, why does everyone think that if someone has different views that they’re automatically be jealous?

And she’s right about what she said though, maybe you’re jealous that she’s gonna be free to do what she likes?

Everything she has said is true (I am a dog owner and bloody love them, but it is a huge commitment and not one to be taken lightly).

I opened this, saw that it was a French bulldog and assumed that she had criticised your choice of breed. She would have been right about that too.

It's true. Those dogs also have a horrible life with health complications relating to being unable to breathe properly.

This! Especially after your update post. She's right!

Your friend has a lot of common sense and gives good advice. She definitely does not sound as if she is jealous of you at all.

She sounds like a friend who tells you the truth rather than one who just tells you what you what you want to hear. Isn't that what you want in a friend?

I think your friend is bang on and I have a 16 week old puppy that I absolutely adore. I thought very long and hard about the commitment for the next 15 years. He won't ever go into kennels and he comes everywhere we can possibly take him. I'm also at home all day and always will be.

OP has flounced off.

You are being a bit silly, sounds like she was just being honest.

When I read it was a French Bulldog I was expecting her to have lectured you about puppy farming and the risks with that kind of dog which would probably have been my response.

Definitely not jealous, definitely judging your choices.

I think you should listen to your friend more. She's clearly got her head screwed on.
Sounds like she's got your best interests at heart.

You are being ridiculous- you must know that

I do get it. I have a friend who is very straightforward so if you ask her a direct question you’ll get a very direct answer. It’s just her personality. She has changed a bit over last years but I’ve changed as well so now I do less direct questions and get softer answers from her but actually I appreciate her honesty a lot.
I think your friend is right about the dog. I don’t know how you’ve told her about it but there is a chance that she hasn’t felt that you’ve thought it through. Also you’ve asked quite a direct question. I also agree with her that if you’ve got a child with additional needs a French bulldog is not the best breed for you.

I also suspect that she’s right about your partner, because you haven’t said that it’s not true just that you don’t like hearing about it.
It doesn’t sound like she’s pissing on your chips more like she’s worried and cared about you.

I agree with your friend.

I had the same convo today about my friend wanting another baby which I couldn’t think of anything worse and my sister getting a new dog and I said once my very elderly one has gone then I won’t get another as they’re a massive commitment.

My other friend told me all of the reasons she wouldn’t do a masters degree when I told her I want to do one - I really appreciated her opinion even though I had thought about everything carefully.

Why would you not want your friend to give their honest opinion?

Would you prefer to be surrounded by yes men who just agree with everything you say?

You can't even go for a day out, they're a huge commitment. You're friend was correct, and you massively overreacted.

I totally agree with her - and I own two cats.

I'd rather cut my own arm off than own a dog.

I'm also not ashamed that today I'm celebrating as my idiot downstairs neighbour has finally done the right thing and put his dog to sleep...only a good year after his vet told him he should. Even though I don't like dogs I wouldn't have wished that poor animal's last 12 months on my worst enemy. No more having to listen to the poor thing bark for a solid 10 hours a day when he goes out to work, either...

Stop supporting Greeders. Rescues are full to overflowing with Lockdown/recession puppies and dogs that have been dumped. Please consider a rescue dog. Every breed out there needing a home if you do your homework

She immediately began to burst out laughing and said "No! I want to enjoy my life". A bit Confused I asked "What do you mean by that?"- she then said "As I said it... I want to enjoy my life, owning a pet- particularly a dog, I wouldn't get the spontaneity back, I would be worried about leaving it in the house for too long, paying for this and that, having to take it for walks when I don't feel like it. Sometimes- out of the whim, I just want to book a holiday but with a pet, I will have to think about who is going to take care of it, dog sitters...I may get a cat as they are a bit more independent but still, a pet comes with a lot of responsibility".

if she said all that, I'd say she needs to stfu. She lacks a social filter!

I feel exactly as your friend does and I'd quite happily tell you 🤣

I do feel she's a bit jealous. She had always been the sensible one and is very risk adverse. I think because of that, it gets in the way of her decision making.

But what is she jealous of?

A partner who doesn't contribute to bills and has debt?
> Maybe she is happy without that.

Buying a home?
> Maybe she'd rather save up a bit first or not get a mortgage just yet.

Children?
> Not everyone wants or chooses to have them.

A puppy?

> She knows that it would have a negative impact on her preferred lifestyle.

I am not sure she has much to be jealous of based on those aspects you mention and I don't think her making sensible decisions about her own life is a negative thing either. Not everyone chooses to take risks when it comes to their money and lifestyle and not everyone is jealous that others are willing to do so.

Everything she has said is accurate.

OP is what you get when you tell a generation of children that they're only getting bullied cause the bullies are jealous.

No love. Nobody's jealous of you.

You asked her and she told you.

If you hadn’t have asked, it might of been a bit of kissing on your parade, but you did ask.

I wouldn’t get a dog for all the reasons your friend listed (and more!) and if a friend asked me if I’d ever get a dog, I’d say no and tell her why,