He deconstructed my knitting pile.

[MappyDappy]

I am sure I am not being unreasonable here. But here goes.

My partner does a hobby which involves him being out late alot. I asked him a few nights ago if he could skip one so as to spend some more time with him.

He wasnt happy and expressed that I had my hobby that I do every night! (Knitting) but I do this in house. I don't go out to any groups etc. He stayed home. We watched a movie. All good. Went to bed.

Got up this morning and my entire knitting pile (was knitting a cardi and socks for a friend) had been unwound and was sitting in neat balls of wool! I'm absolutely astounded. AIBU to think there is no need for this behaviour for the sake of a night off.

unhinged psychopath as others have suggested. have you someone who can stay with you for a few nights. I've met his type before (via friends) and he'll be doing a sit in on your roof next!!

Yeah, this, if this is true.

The image of someone sitting for ages undoing their partner's work is really unsettling. It's not a quick action.

Worrying behaviour. I'd be surprised that it's been the first time he's shown a red flag?

Kudos for you making the decision to get rid. Well done!
Have you told him what's happening?

Good on you.

I wish I’d been that strong with STBXH and saved myself years of hang wringing and shit.

if you can afford it, just go away for a few days after locks have been changed and when you return, never look back, never complain and never explain

10:11 you didn’t know if you were being unreasonable to feel upset and somehow under an hour a later you have ruined all his stuff and packed all his belongings into the car?

Indeed.
An hour between first post here and then having all his stuff in the car, plus posting a few times and doing the guitar and music stuff.

Then half an hour to drive his stuff to his work place, get it into reception and organise a note?

I'm expecting the locks all changed by ... 12?

Christ alive! At first I was giving him the benefit of the doubt thinking he had unravelled your knitting unaware of what he was destroying and maybe trying to 'tidy up' for you. But then he said basically he was getting revenge for you not letting him go out??????!!!!!! I've only skimmed through a few replies in the whole thread, but I'm as outraged as everyone else. Who the hell does something like that? It's very much like when my stbexh ate a scone that my work friend had bought me which I was saving in the fridge for later. I asked him where it was and he admitted he'd eaten it, but in such a sarcastic manner, I took my wedding rings off there and then. Final straw.

Because women have backed her and have given her the courage of her convictions.

I would seriously be contemplating the level of injury that I could inflict with the Knitting needles!

Imagine OP had been up for a while before posting and had started packing his things up before posting to ask if she was being unreasonable or overreacting to what she'd found...?

Interesting how everyone can see the bigger picture, and that this is not about the knitting but the behaviour.

Good on you OP for the way you are dealing with this. You are most definitely not been unreasonable- crack on!!

Jesus I joined MN just to comment on this thread!

Are you sure that he's going to a hobby and not got another woman on the go, that is as I'm sure you know not a normal reaction to spending an evening with your partner.

Good on you OP!! We need an update though... how you doing?

"He said, well I couldn't do mine last night now you can't either"

So you've had a conversation about this?

God, this reminds me of my ex. I asked him to be careful of one of my books with a dust jacket on it, and while I was in the bath he ripped the dust jacket on every book I owned that had one.

It’s the calculated malice that’s frightening. I’ll bet he’s a charming bastard too. Don’t let him gaslight his way back in.

Hope he doesn't turn up at your house trying to break the door down.
He sounds nasty.

Obviously has ambitions to be a top chef-they like deconstructing things that are better constructed.

He's text me saying "thought so. I suppose I'm out on my ear?" So he must have taken lunch today.

I'm midway through sorting the locks out. Following a YouTube tutorial.

Yeh I’d say it does, what a shitbag.

Crikey. 😲

@MappyDappy I'd call in a professional, just in case.

Good.

That seems a bit of a mild mannered reaction for someone who's just been kicked out.