Breastfeeding Shamed by my DP

[Lullabies2Paralyze]

On holiday with our 4 month old breastfed son.
was in a pub garden having lunch and while waiting for our food I started to feed baby.

my partner said “cover him up” and I asked why (as I never do, don’t use a weird shawl thing but I wear baggy tops and just lift them up).

his reasoning was we were in a “restaurant” and there were other people. I ignored him and carried on feeding the way I do (pointing out he’s a baby not a 10 year old child so it shouldn’t be weird for people!)

I don’t have my tits out on display while doing it and personally I think covering my baby draws more attention to what I was doing.

who was being unreasonable?

YABU - you shouldn’t breastfeed in public places without using a breastfeeding cover

YANBU - it’s perfectly natural, your DP can go do one and you shouldn’t feel ashamed about it

Alternatively, feed your baby at the table, people can mind their own, avert their gaze, have a fit of the vapours, and it's only them that's bothered, you've been kind enough to give them something to have a little froth about it, you keep on enjoying your evening, the baby has its evening meal in a setting specifically designed for eating and drinking, not weeing, pooing, and vomiting.

What's the problem?

Win-win. No harm, no foul.

I hate this attitude. I went to a wedding when mine was little and my mum was adamant I shouldn’t feed him during the ceremony. I was in the back row, nobody was looking at me cos they were busy watching the ceremony and it was a lot less disruptive than having to take him out because he was crying.

You can see why breastfeeding in public spaces needs legal protection when you read some of the retrograde hogwash being spouted on this thread.

OP buy your partner a pair of blinkers. Suits his attitude.

With a 4 month old I barely notice and when I do, I don't care. I do get a bit uncomfortable with bigger babies. The type who are already well over a year, toddling around and can loudly ask for boob (never milk for some reason). Though I think it's more that those tend to be the performance mothers. The type who sit in the most visible table with both boobs out and switching between taking selfies and staring at everyone with a "go on, challenge me" expression. Might just be my area but i've seen it a few times.

Some people on here seem to equate breast milk with other body fluids such as urine. Maybe that's why they think this should go on in the toilet. For those posters, breast milk is not a waste fluid, and will not harm anyone by being in a restaurant. It's food, for babies and therefore perfectly acceptable in a restaurant.
As for 'no-one wants to see that' - what tosh. Don't presume to speak for others.

It makes me feel awkward and a bit uncomfortable to see it but I know that's my personal hang up which is no one's issue but my own so I'd just look away and think nothing more of it.

Same here. Don't want to see it. That is my problem though, you do whatever you feel comfortable.

And it’s OK to not want to see it.

You just look away.

@MrsTerryPratchett spot on many decades ago I breast fed my dc ahem at the end of pier long distance air journey (PIA actually they were hilarious when the cabin was dark I needed a drink so I went to their hidey hole near their kitchenette and asked for a drink "smile & please help your self) they put us in the seats and supplied a carry cot (it was along time ago) My dear MIL was very supportive & my dh wouldn't have dreamt of saying or telling how to bf (I think if my MIL had heard any criticism from him...
What is a women bf suppose to do -hide in a closet or go back to the loo feeding (yuck)

Imagine being offended by a baby EATING at a RESTAURANT.

OP yanbu!

Anyone with a problem with it is bonkers. Your dp is a git!

Tell him to put a blanket over his own head next time he's eating. Dickhead.

I think we should ignore this poster; they are clearly trying to wind people up. At least, I assume so, as I don't believe anyone could be that ignorant and lacking in intelligence and education in real life.

I wanted to breastfeed but it didn’t work for me which was reAlly sad as it is such a beautiful, natural thing for a mother to feed her baby. I’m sorry you have been shamed this way. There is 1000% nothing wrong with you breastfeeding wherever and however you wish to

I was unable to breastfeed my baby and I've always felt I missed out on the experience.

OP your husband is being an arse. Wtf are boobs for, but to feed babies? It's totally natural. Other people can avert their gaze, if they aren't comfortable.

Just to be clear, that was aimed at Batman, not Biscuits!

@PlantsAndSpaniels I fed my DDs until they were a year old in lots of different public places. Nobody every said anything to me. Please ignore some of the ridiculous comments on this thread. The law is also on your side.

Why is it bonkers and inappropriate?

So don’t look.

I'm not a mum. I doubt I ever will be. But I swear to god if i was ever in a restaurant when someone made a shitty comment to a breast feeding mum I will wade the fuck in! Absolute craziness by some on this thread. It's a boob, not a weapon of mass destruction. Get over yourselves.

I BF’d DD in the front pew during her christening ceremony. Nobody cared, as they shouldn’t.

Anyone who doesn’t like to see it, pop a blanket over your head then we can’t see your judgy face either. Win win!

Wonder if anyone voting YABU ever breastfed themselves?
I'm guessing not 🤔

She doesn’t have to move anywhere more private. You’re the one that has to move. Maybe you should stay at home, away from the general public.

Yeah he’s being a knob.
I fed my babies anywhere, ranging from a very formal event with royalty in attendance to leaning over a shopping trolley seat in Asda 🤷🏻‍♀️😂 and everywhere in between.
The primary function of breasts is to feed babies. Your DP needs to get over himself

I would expect someone breastfeeding to cover up as much as possible somewhere like a restaurant. Would you like to have your meal with your head covered?

I find the "I don't want to see it" brigade pathetic. Don't look! If that's too difficult pop a blanket or shawl over your head. If it's ok to do this to babies then it should be ok for you.

It wasn't even that warm today but every direction you looked there were men with their tops off. Yet if a woman dares to use her breasts for what they were made for, she's somehow wrong.

I’m misophonic and the sound makes me nauseated so I have more skin in the game than someone who can move their damn eyes away, but I just ensure I have headphones on me or I leave, because it’s my issue and mum has a legal right to be doing what she’s doing. This thread is nuts.