To think MILF is not a fucking compliment?

[BrokenToy]

I went out out the other weekend to a very ‘young’ bar locally. I got very sweetly chatted up by a fetching young man of 22 (I’m 42 and very happily married).

It all went a bit sour when he said I’m a ‘right MILF’ and was put out when I turned on my heel and walked off.

This is not a compliment, right? I was very much enjoying the confidence boost of a strapping young lad showing interest and then he completely fucking ruined it 🤣

I don't understand. MILF isn't an age thing.... it just means your a hot mum!

It's not that your in your 40s! I've heard people in their 20s say it. I don't find it a crude word.

I think the other thing for me is that being a mum isn’t my whole identity (even though dc thinks it is). I don’t want to only be viewed as a mum even with compliments attached to it. I want going out dancing and socialising to be a break from my mum status. Not to be reminded of it in some pick up line. Still love being a mum but still love the other qualities I have too.

It’s a compliment, you may not have liked it but many would. You go to bars (or anywhere) and if you have delicate sensibilities you’ll hear things that offend you that would flatter others or make them laugh.

Its a term that’s been around for years it just usually means slightly older hot woman. It’s like calling someone a bad bitch - some old people might not take that well but young people know it means a sexy woman, slightly femme fatale, in a tounge in cheek way usually.

@ImustLearn2Cook

Thats not too much to ask from your own friends or people nearer your age - but to expect from some random lad trying to pick up an older woman in a bar for sex it’s way too high an expectation.
You can bet if this guy had of slept with her he’d be bragging to his friends about the milf he banged, probably wanting to get her nudes and show them etc.

I don’t know why we’re expecting an immature moron trying to pull “milfs” to be some kind of moral standard. I would expect that type of language as a woman in her 40’s if I go hang out in a bar with young men and entertain their flirtation for the sake of my ego.

@SammySammySammytheBetterfly Expectation? What the hell are you talking about? You’re a mum I’d like to fuck is a massive turn off for me and that’s all there is to it. Everything I wrote is about how I honestly feel not about some expectation I have of anyone else.

In all honesty I really don’t get how it’s a compliment. No version of you are fuckable is a compliment. But then the bar isn’t that low for me and I’m not that desperate.

@ImustLearn2Cook

Im saying that those like the OP who let dopey young men hit on them bars because it’s flattering should expect to hear those young men say crude and stupid stuff like this. It probably isn’t a big deal to those they usually pull.

All I’m saying is that’s the kind of crass language you’ll hear from random young lads who are trying to pull older women (or any women) in bars. Many of the women who are up fro being hit on in this situation are equally crass and will probably be amused. If your not up for it don’t hang out in bars with young guys who try to hit on you. OP didn’t have to entertain this.

“Im saying that those like the OP who let dopey young men hit on them bars because it’s flattering should expect to hear those young men say crude and stupid stuff like this.” Sammy Sammy.

Bullshit.

@ImustLearn2Cook

What’s bullshit about it?
have you heard some of the crass and sexual pick up lines used in bars? Many of which work?
If your entertaining some young guy cut like this who is far younger than you don’t be surprised when he says this kind of stuff. If you don’t like it cut it off right away, don’t let it go on till he eventually says something you don’t like then post about it online.

i googled milf and the definition was
‘a sexually attractive older woman, typically one who has children’
are you insulted because you assumed he thought you were closer to his age?

MILF is not yummy mummy (an alternative) and it does have a certain connotation, almost implying you are someone for short-term sexual fun not a long-term relationship. Not valuing your qualities and personality, just your body.

So YANBU to dislike it.

@balalake

He knew she was married and was hitting on her in a bar - I think it goes without saying he didn’t want a long term relationship. It’s silly for her to be offended by the term when she was the one entertaining the flirtation from someone who she knew knew this because she found it flattering.
What was she expecting to hear? Love sonnets?

Men are happy to shove their dicks anywhere warm and wet. Being seen as ‘fuckable’ is NOT a compliment.

"I got very sweetly chatted up by a fetching young man of 22"

His aim was just to fuck you. He got to the point. Describing him as sweet was patronising. I don't know why you entertained him tbh. Some are clever enough to know what not to say, but they are still thinking it. Were you under the impression that he saw you a relationship material?

Yup.

it’s a disgusting term. And yeah, he’s fetished you as an ‘older’ woman.

To do the reverse to him, at 22 he’d probably be shit in bed anyway. So you dodged a bullet.

If you think that then you're hanging out with the wrong men.

Yeah but you’re a right MILF’ means he’s telling me I’m a generation older than him and I didn’t need that pointing out.

does it? I thought milf just meant mum

or does M stand for mutton?

The OP seems most offended by the fact she knew that he knew that she was older!

@tigertigerg Pretty much. Despite being married She was happy for this young guy to keep hitting on her (and I doubt it was much more sophisticated in the beginning) until he made her feel old.

@tigertigerg

Play stupid games win stupid prizes

Funny how the OP was happy to flirt and be chatted up until he said something that she perceived to be an insult.

Given the ubiquity of internet porn, and the crass objectification and aggressiveness of heterosexual porn, I don’t think one can really claim that sexual objectification is at its least acceptability ever.

It’s funny that women don’t like be chatted to/ chatted up by men until they are insulted by them?

It's when you get called a GILF that you start getting annoyed 😂

Don't hang around bars to be chatted up?
It is a rovolting phrase - but regaldless of the "M" part, who wants to be told by a relative stranger they'd like to fuck them?