To think MILF is not a fucking compliment?

[BrokenToy]

I went out out the other weekend to a very ‘young’ bar locally. I got very sweetly chatted up by a fetching young man of 22 (I’m 42 and very happily married).

It all went a bit sour when he said I’m a ‘right MILF’ and was put out when I turned on my heel and walked off.

This is not a compliment, right? I was very much enjoying the confidence boost of a strapping young lad showing interest and then he completely fucking ruined it 🤣

And the normalisation of objectification continues

You're taking it all a bit too seriously. Milf is a pretty standard term amongst the yung uns and it's rarely said in a sexual context, despite what you think.

Flirtation and being sexually attractive is perfectly fine, despite what you think, just maybe not with hubby at home.

‘Hubby’ found it hilarious btw. We are very secure.

Is being sexually objectified OK as long as no one mentions your age?

MILF is a revolting term and I'm not quite sure why a mature adult woman would find the compliments of a 22 year old flattering. I hate to burst your bubble OP but lots of men do not discriminate if they think they're in with a chance of a shag and if flattery is what it takes to get them what they want they are happy to use it. If it breathes a 22 will shag it in my experience.

I think you need better self esteem if the attention of a horny 20 something is needed to boost your confidence.

I hate the term milf.
It’s as if they’re saying being a mother makes you automatically unfuckable but you, you’re an exception and still have value as a fuckable person.

There was a great thread on this years ago when most of us agreed that this was not a compliment, even if it was meant as one. It just smacks of: ‘Even though you’ve had kids and I’d expect you to be wobbly, knackered, old and pretty frumpy, you’re actually surprisingly fuckable!’ Very immature.

I’m not sure I agree with that. A woman can value herself and still feel attractive/desired by a bit of sexual objectification type attention/banter from a young 22yr old man when she is 42 yo.

If the man were 82yo, then well the feelings would be very different, but the woman would still value herself.

Whether or not you value yourself doesn’t dictate the situations that make you feel attractive/desired. It’s all individual and dependent on context.

Are we allowed to say dilf?

I disagree. It's another example of the insidious creep of what's become acceptable. If you want to be objectified, crack on, it's not for me.

Sure why not?
Check this youtube Hot Dads (don’t worry no nudity/not porn, just a funny video)
“The hottest quality in a man isn't his six-pack. It's his Dad skills.”
m.youtube.com/watch?v=AhDoZzSF1pQ

Sexual objectification from a stranger doesn't make women who value themselves feel attractive or desired.

Someone finds me attractive/tempting - that will make me feel more attractive than usual, at least a little bit, for a small while.

I don't really care if knowing someone wants me sexually giving me a wee internal boost, means you think I don't value myself.

Why would you enjoy being chatted up by someone so young? 🤢

Flirt with your husband, that’s what people in long term happy relationships do, they certainly don’t need it from people young enough to be their child.

Yep. Agree with this. I'm not ashamed to say it gives me a little boost at almost 40 and 2 kids later. 😃

“What’s become acceptable?” What planet have you been living on? Sexual objectification is at its least accepted ever in the history of humanity. I’m not saying I want to be objectified. I’m just saying whether I’m objectified or not, or how I feel about it doesn’t in any way affect how I value myself? My self esteem isn’t so fragile as to require a zero objectification zone for me to value myself.

Whether or not you value yourself doesn’t dictate the situations that make you feel attractive/desired. It’s all individual and dependent on context.

👏🏻

It's more the sexual objectification of women

Cant believe anyone would consider it a compliment, that's utterly depressing.

Why is it wrong when flirting with someone to let them know you sexually desire them? Clearly there is a physical attraction there. You've never objectified anyone? Never saw a fit bloke and thought corrr and imagined fucking him? Never expressed any sexual desire towards a man's body who you are flirting with? Why is it wrong to be objectified if the whole thing is based on casual sex anyway? If I have a fling with someone on a night out, I'm not looking for them to apreciate my scintillating personality or career ambition, I just want them to like my appearance for a shag.

When is objectification ok or not? I guess flings or one night stands or casual sex relationships aren't morally ok because they are based on sexual objectification - you are with them for sex, they are an object for pleasure, you're not with them for a relationship or to enjoy spending time with them as a lover/friend. Is that ok or no?

You just referred to him as a 'strapping young lad'!!

@XSnoe

Excellent post, totally agree with you.

Be grateful he didn't say Gilf.

Sometimes I wonder how some people have sex at all. It's surely too degrading

Same here.

And
Sexual objectification from a stranger doesn't make women who value themselves feel attractive or desired.

Maybe not for you. I'm more than happy to accept the compliment. Though to be fair I don't think I've had it said to my face, just reported back to me.

Agree. It's crass. However I also remember the days of "Grab a granny night" and "the erection section" for the slow dances 😝

Oh, and wet tshirt contests. Or ride the mechanical bull in knickers and chaps as sexy as you can contests.

Of course there’s the wear a low cut top, challenge a likely mark to a game of snooker for money and then distract distract distract to a win.

I don’t really think it’s a compliment though when so many men will look at/chat up/try it on with anyone.

It's a revolting term and any bloke that calls me that gets a mouthful 😡

It's also assuming I'm a mother which I'm not, by choice