I feel most a peace when sleeping next to my children- too much right ?

[helloteas]

I have two, one is 3 months and the other is two and a half..

I've been keeping away from husband as to not wake him when baby cries as he has very early starts and I've now got used to sleeping with both of them.

When toddler sleeps alone, I don't like it.

It's now also become difficult to have her sleep alone. Last night I put her down alone and she woke up crying.. I'm not sure how to get her used to sleeping alone again..

Any advice ? I can't just sleep with both forever !

You're wrong.

Babies are at the least risk of SIDS when sleeping on their own, in their own, bare, sleep space. Do some research.

Breast feeding is a protective factor against SIDS, room sharing is also a protective factor, so is following ABCs of safe sleep, but protective factors don't stack. If your baby is formula fed and sleeping In their own room as long as they are following ABCs they are no more at risk than a baby who is breast fed and room sharing in their own space.

True SUIDS is incredibly rare. Most infant deaths classified as SIDS are deaths due to complications re bedding, adults, other children, items in cot with baby etc etc.
There are ways to make bed sharing safer, but not safe. If you wish to ignore evidence in favour of your own agenda and succumb to a shocking amount of survivor bias then that's your decision but don't try to reframe facts.

I co-sleep with DC2 (who’s 2) and have DC3 (9 months) in the cot in the same room. She’s been clingier since DC3 was born and wakes every 2 hours or so until I give in and put her in my bed and then she sleeps fine. DH sleeps in her room now, we used to swap them over at some point in the night when we got fed up of the wake ups and needed sleep but DH actually prefers it this way as it’s less interrupted sleep. All the kids go to bed at 7 so we have from 7-11 together downstairs then sleep separately, it’s not affected our relationship and we all get a better nights sleep so it’s probably helped if anything.

I plan on getting her to sleep alone once DC3 sleeps through the night, then if DC2 wakes I can just go into her, rather than have to be dealing with wake ups from one of them every couple of hours.

DC1 has always slept alone brilliantly. Different kids need different approaches.

PUTONYOURSHOES

there is nothing evidential in that link, it is a link to a very much lactivist organisation pushing their own agenda.

If you care to actually learn, look into peer reviewed research and into the actual statistics and numbers. The reasons why SIDS deaths are classified as such and why in certain countries where bed sharing is largely the norm the death classifications of infants are very different to the UK or US.

Babies are very much more at risk of death when bed sharing.

I didn't man formula feeding is the baseline or breast feeding isn't the baseline.

What I mean is that there is a baseline risk of SIDS to every single baby. Then there are protective factors and risk factors.
Protective factors don't stack.

Protective factors would be things like breast feeding, ABCs, room sharing. Risk factors things like Co sleeping, premature baby, not following ABCs.

If a baby is in their own sleep space, following ABCs then they are as safe as they will ever be, additional protective factors such as breast feeding or room sharing offer no additional protection above and beyond that.

No either I've not articulated myself well or you've wilfully misunderstood (or both) but no I don't think that nor do I think my post implied that.

Don't worry about it. My kids (9 & 12) still often sleep in the same room as us and it's fine. It's natural. They can sleep alone. They would just rather not. Adults often sleep better with loved ones close. Why do we expect kids to be more independent than the average adult?! As for the no sex thing... why can't people use their imagination?! Sex doesn't have to be in bed!