to be suspicious my DH trims his pubes?

[Krazylady]

Discovered (by way of seeing lots of short pube hair in the loo) that my DH has trimmed his pubes ahead of a 3 days away in London for work.

Back story: married for 20 years, DH has had a history of using sex workers, HOWEVER he has been trying really hard to rebuild my trust and save our marriage over the last year. We have not been having sex mainly bc of my trust issues but have been getting on really well, sleeping in same bed, cuddling, having fun and I thought we were heading in the right direction...

Then I find the pubes in the loo. Why would he be trimming down there if we are not having a sexual relationship ourselves? Am I overthinking this?

That's why I do it. OH wouldn't think anything of it. I like to look groomed in a costume

This is definitely getting picked up by a paper.

Sorry OP it doesn't sound good of he's doing it before a work trip and you aren't having sex together (so it's not for you iyswim)

I would walk away, it's not going to stop.

He hasn't had sex for a year so I wouldn't be surprised.

That must be an unusual sight.

Did his barber not say anything or does he do it under the cape? If so I would image that's a bit risky, doing something like that almost 'blindfold'. Box of plasters at the ready I suppose.

Was he a member of the Dangerous Sports Club that we used to hear about?

I'd hazard a guess that he almost certainly has had sex in a year.

No, you’re not overthinking it. But you knew that, right. He should have been gone with knowledge of the sex workers. You’re definitely right not to have sex with him, goodness knows what you might catch.

He's planning on getting some sex while he's away. Are you sure he actually has a trip or is he lying about that too

My DH trims once a year before our family holiday when he knows it is going to be hot and sweaty and he gets groin itch or sweat rash or whatever.

That's a pube trim though, not a shave. We are not of that bald genital age group.

Given his history I can see why you are on high alert . But realistically why would you bother if you were paying someone for sex .
You going to get sex short back and sides or not .

You being unreasonable by staying with an absolute cunt who thinks it's OK to rent women's bodies for his pleasure.

I couldn't bear to be in the same room as a man who did that, let alone the same bed.

I am wondering if you can now use this info to your advantage. I mean it's as though you've been given a 'head's up' that he plans to cheat that he doesn't know about. I wouldn't mention what you've found.

Is there some way you can use this knowledge to catch him out and know for sure? It seems to me that you are someone who needs the evidence in their face to really accept that he is not going to change. Sorry if that's blunt but you have been more forgiving than most and to even question his motive given his history is pretty naive.... Might 'catching him' be the push you need to move on from this worthless piece of shit?

Sorry OP.

Oh gawd, I've just googled lice in your pubes, please no, I hope he hasn't brought any visitors home with him from his travels......

Nose or ear hair??

Clutching at straws, here on your behalf.

Maybe he's doing porn?

Men shave their pubes to make their cocks look bigger

What, like this 🤣

It could be because it is hot. But yeah I'd be suspicious. I'd want to get some sound evidence though, before divorcing. There is no point confronting him, he can easily lie.

Yes men on my house do this as we made a fuss when the were all over the sink before!

im so sorry if this is true op. What he did to you and for you to try again must have been the hardest thing you’ve ever done. And to have it chucked back at you must knock you down.
but this is all on him. All of it.don’t you dare fall down with weariness of it.get up,take action,get a life you deserve.
20 years.that is a long time.it’s so hard.I’m just really really sorry op. Hope you are ok. Do you have any support in rl?can u get some.you need a big hug.
where do u feel I go from here?
please though please don’t take him back.

My ex used to trim his because they got stuck between his bum cheeks/legs when cycling and was uncomfortable. Could be this innocent i think

Do you beleive you can end it now?
do I need to follow him.go to hotel?phone hotel when he’s there ask for his guest?
I don’t no.to me you deserve this didn’t g to be enough but…

Bloody autocorrect completely fkd that message

He has a history of using sex workers and you're still with him?

Well, he has no reason to stop then.

Sorry, but you need to wise up.

Change the locks when he’s in London

This, in spades.

Echo the others. I think you know OP. Don't ignore your instinct. And no, you don't have trust issues, you have a cheating man who feels it's ok to exchange money to have sex with women. I couldn't be in the same room, never mind the same bed.