Incident at Nursery, how much do I lose my shit over it?

[CerseiForTheWin]

Name changed as Ive been sounding off about this so much that it could be recognisable.

DS started nursery a few weeks back, he’s ten months old. I didn’t want him to go particularly but I have to work and that’s a whole other thread. No family nearby to help, just me DH and DS. He does 3.5 days and I compress full time hours to have him for the other 1.5 days.

I have been thinking they were a bit rubbish with a few aspects, like not really helping him with his bottle so it’s either going all over his clothes and he had a rash on his chest from it, or he’s not really bothering to drink at all. He doesn’t eat much yet really so the formula is definitely still an important part of his diet. Added to that they’re crap with updates, I have no real idea what he does in there all day, all we get at pick up is ‘he’s been really good today’ what does that even mean?!

Anyway, got the dreaded nursery phone call at work on Friday. They emphasised the fact that he was ‘absolutely fine’ but had a slight injury to his fingers as they’ve got trapped in a door that someone opened. I thought we’ll that’s a bit shit why was he near the door but they said he’d just ‘grazed’ his fingers but had had lots of cuddles and was fine.

DH picked up- he’s not fine, he’s had the skin taken off the ends of two of his fingers. They’ve not dressed it or anything, it’s just raw. Apparently it looked worse than it was because he kept putting his fingers in his mouth. Duh. The key worker waved the accident form at DH and he signed it but frustratingly didn’t know he was supposed to receive a copy. She didn’t give him one. He says he just wanted to get DS home but was shocked at how bad it looked. So I don’t know exactly what happened.

have included a pic. Keeping the fingers clean is a nightmare. They’re really sore.

Obviously I’m really angry. I’ll email and have a meeting with the manger as I want to know exactly what happened. How mad would you go if it was your baby, and has anybody had any similar indecent happen at their nursery?

looking at pulling him out to go somewhere else too but slightly stuck for availability for the times we need and location but have started enquiring.

I’m definitely not over reacting am I ? Incidentally I work in childcare myself in a different capacity and in 14 years of that have never caused injury to a child in any way. The kind of accidents I might expect are bumps and falls etc but this is something else.

It does look like a burn ,it looks like it's blistered,and it's popped ,poor little lad
How are his finger nails?, my son got his fingers trapped in a door when he was a toddler, and it bruised underneath the nails, tbh it made a right mess and the nail came off ,but it was very obviously a trapped finger accident .

We used to live in an open plan kitchen/diner when DS was a baby. One day when he was about 10 months old he crawled up behind me and put his hand on the hot oven door as I was taking the grill tray out. His fingers looked exactly like your poor boys. It definitely doesn't look inkeeping with being trapped in a door.

I know it doesn't matter but I showed my husband your poor baby's fingers and he said burns like others have mentioned. Is there a kitchen where he could have touched something?

As many have said already, that looks blistered therefore a burn.

It does look like a burn! I'd be absolutely raging!! I'd also be reporting them. I don't know to who but surely there's some board? I don't know but that is pure neglect! Hope you're okay op

I'm not one usually to fuss, but I would take him to hospital to see a Paediatrician. How would a 10 month old get his fingers in a door?
He shouldn't be feeding himself with a bottle he should be being cuddled properly. Write to the Nursery coplain and keep a copy. Is there another one he could go to, or a Childminder. And then complain to local authorities.

Omg that's awful poor baby!!

I would go mad at this! Like heads would roll.

Looks more like a burn to me tbh, doesn't look like much bruising which would be visible if trapped in a door.

Where was the care worker? I'd be v concerned and he wouldn't be going back unless the nursery took accountability

Ok so update- the video chat with 111 was a bit useless as couldn’t get wriggly DS in the right position to assess properly so went up to minor injuries unit.

it’s not a burn, it really did look like that on the first pic because it was all red raw from where he’d been sucking. it’s a friction/scraping injury that’s taken the skin off that was caused by a heavy object or getting trapped under something so the door thing does check out, but they were confused as to how the injury occurred on the pads of his fingers and not the other side although he does have a very small surface graze to his palm too. When they cleaned it it just started bleeding everywhere so had obviously been trying to scab over. It’s now properly gauzed and dressed but yes obviously I know feel even more terrible for not doing all this sooner but honestly he was in good spirits and I was managing to keep it dry with scratch sleeves and regularly checking it and keeping it clean. They couldn’t believe a professional childcare setting wouldn’t put a proper dressing on let alone it happening in the first place.

and yes DH has a tendency to under react. He’s not under reacting anymore.

I really appreciate all the advice and the solidarity, except for that weird Mozzie Australian comment about not putting a baby in daycare, but some people are just twats like that.

Do they have CCTV? I’d ask to see where it happened and see the footage. I think it’s negligent and I’d put him somewhere else tbh. The not helping him with milk would be enough to move him in my opinion! They absolutely should be helping him with his milk…

In my opinion ofsted ARE useless. My son had 26 incidents in which he was hurt by other children in 3 months. 8 weeks in a row he was coming home with bites, bleeding from scratches to his face. Staff saw probably 3 of the incidents and all the rest were missed entirely. I would say that was a safeguarding issue as the children clearly weren’t being watched.

That is shocking. Yanbu. Doesn't look like it's been done by a door at all. I accidentally shut my sons fingers in the door when he was about 4. It bruised, nothing like that.

Oh poor little lamb. I hope he's not in too much pain. Many years ago, when I was a mum of a young child who was hurt at nursery, I wish (in hindsight) that I had had the guts to lose my shit with them. I wanted too much to only see their good reputation and not believe what had happened. My child's wellbeing should have been above any concerns I had about the offending a nursery's reputation. (On a side note, said child is fine with no memories of what happened).

Sorry just seen your update

Op, this is definitely not an injury caused by the door, if caused by door, it would look more purple and after about 2 days would turn to blue, violet colour. This is a second degree burn , pool little thing, please take him to the doctors, get some cooling spray and definitely never again send him there, wishes ❤

Absolutely not! I'd be furious. It also doesn't look like any graze I've seen, much more like a burn? I'd be really on them and ask if they have CCTV of the incident?

And he definitely definitely does need help still with bottles, at home he’s cuddled and fed on our laps. I’m not being PFB but he’s little for his age and not strong enough to tip the bottle up properly yet to drink much from it if left to do it himself. I was really nagging them about this all last week because it was so hot and I was so concerned about hydration.

Sorry just to add although it was really traumatic when he was getting seen to and he screamed his head off he’s happy to be home and has had calpol and stories and cuddles and gone straight to sleep. I’m a bit of a mess but will deal with arranging this week so he doesn’t have to go in to the nursery on Tuesday. I have a half day Wednesday so have suggested a meeting with them then. Have asked for paperwork and cctv and made it very clear I’ll be getting to the bottom of what happened.

This does not add up. Where are the marks above, by the finger nails if the fingers had been caught in a door? What door would
open onto a nursery playroom where there might be children playing? Ask to see CCTV if they have it. Depending on what they say I would consider flagging this up to Ofsted. Too many red flags for me, I would not be able to trust my child in the care of this setting. I hope you can find suitable alternative care.

No, I agree it still does not add up- but they said it is not a burn.

I am an Early years Practitioner and this is shocking and the way they have dealt with it.
Definately ring Ofsted, if that was my child I would be, they are very helpful.
Something doesnt add up here....

So pleased to hear he's been seen to, OP, hopefully people will see you've updated! 😊 I did think so about it being a friction burn, so must have been underneath the sport - either way, you need to get to the bottom of it.

I agree about the milk. We held and cuddled LO til he stopped drinking it at 18 months! Surely that's a nice time for his key worker to spend with him.

Let us know how you all get on. Xx

Underneath the door**!!

Agree with all other posters that it looks like a burn, I struggle to see how a door could of done that? Poor boy 😔

That’s a burn. If that was my DS I would be pulling him out of nursery, contacting ofsted and looking for alternative childcare. So sorry this has happened, OP. Hope his little fingers heal soon and that the GP has some good advice/treatment.

Saw your earlier message! Glad he’s been seen.