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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not want work colleague to go to same resort as me at same time?

141 replies

malificent7 · 20/07/2022 13:46

I booked my summer holiday last year for August. My colleague booked his to same resort with his wife about 3 months ago after hearing where i was going. Just came back...fine.

However,him and his wife liked it so much that they are thinking about going back to same resort in August when I will be there.

Now i like my colleague but i want to get away from it all. Not bump into him on the beach. Aibu to find this odd/ unboundaried?

And no...there's nothing romantic going on.

OP posts:
ILikeHotWaterBottles · 20/07/2022 13:48

That is weird, but not like you can say no you can't go. Just say have fun, and if he tries to arrange any meet ups say no we will be busy.

BlanketsBanned · 20/07/2022 13:50

What makes you think your colleague would even want to meet up with you.

Icanstillrecallourlastsummer · 20/07/2022 13:51

I wouldnt' like this either, but not much you can do.

Holly763 · 20/07/2022 13:52

Hmm you can't stop your colleague going the same resort as you. I get it's not ideal but you told him about it that resort I'm guessing? 🤷‍♀️

Bigmouthshouthotair · 20/07/2022 13:52

BlanketsBanned · 20/07/2022 13:50

What makes you think your colleague would even want to meet up with you.

This.

Ducksinthebath · 20/07/2022 13:52

I've ended up doing similar and it was crap bumping into them all the time, and weirdly it was also really awkward once we were back in the office. It felt like we'd done something together and excluded others (small team) and to others not in the team it probably sounded like we were having an affair.

Lobelia123 · 20/07/2022 13:54

I dont blame you.....I also wouldnt like it!! When Im on holiday I want soem anonymity to eat, drink, relax and swim safe in the knowledge that its all fairly private and anonymous, i wont have to make nice or socialise with anyone I dont want to, and wont have to be judged by an acquaintance on what they observe or the state of my bikini body etc etc! havign said that, its a free world and Im not too sure what you can do about it. You cant stop them going there. You can either reschedule yourself, hope their plans are all so much hot air and dont materialise (I mean who can afford two holidays so close to each other??) or come up with a plan of action if you do end up at the resort at the same time. Eg plan is to greet cheerfully on first meeting, then wish them well and carry on with what you planned without giving them another thought. Its up to you if you want to join for a meal or outing or just firmly and politely say no thank you - no explanations needed....

Original poster
malificent7 · 20/07/2022 13:57

There is no way we would want to meet up but i just don't want to bump into him in the 1st place!

OP posts:
SummerL0ving · 20/07/2022 13:58

Ffs. I wouldn't like that either. It's not about whether he wants to meet up with you. It's the fact that he will be there. At the pool, at the entertainment, at the restaurants etc.

When I'm on holiday, I want a break from the people I work with and to spend time with my family. It's nice to not know the other people there.

If I was you, I would just suck it up though. You'll still have a nice time I'm sure. Just be aware of recommending places to your colleagues in future.

Gizlotsmum · 20/07/2022 13:59

How big is the resort? Are you likely to bump into each other

Original poster
malificent7 · 20/07/2022 14:01

I didn't so much recommend it....i just mentioned I was going and he had been a long time ago and had a good time.
I just hate it when people do this copy cat , treading on toes bullshit. No boundaries at all.

OP posts:
Glitterspy · 20/07/2022 14:02

God I hate bumping into other English people when on resort holidays, let alone someone I actually know, particularly a workmate - how utterly cringe-making.

BeneficiaryMadness · 20/07/2022 14:03

How can he copy cat when he’s already been before meeting you?

Original poster
malificent7 · 20/07/2022 14:03

I guess he just got the idea from me.

OP posts:
Original poster
malificent7 · 20/07/2022 14:04

To go this summer. What is he playing at?

OP posts:
pinkyredrose · 20/07/2022 14:06

Do you always go to the same place on holiday? Why not go somewhere else?

2bazookas · 20/07/2022 14:11

you're the one being very odd.

yonce · 20/07/2022 14:13

malificent7 · 20/07/2022 14:01

I didn't so much recommend it....i just mentioned I was going and he had been a long time ago and had a good time.
I just hate it when people do this copy cat , treading on toes bullshit. No boundaries at all.

Copy cat treading on toes bullshit 😂

This has made my afternoon. I've just come back from the states, I hope no one I knew dared book a holiday for the same time!! I'm the only one who should be allowed to go and enjoy a holiday, especially to such a hard to find and unique place 😂

You seem very hung up on this, they haven't even booked anything - just talking about it?

BlanketsBanned · 20/07/2022 14:16

malificent7 · 20/07/2022 14:01

I didn't so much recommend it....i just mentioned I was going and he had been a long time ago and had a good time.
I just hate it when people do this copy cat , treading on toes bullshit. No boundaries at all.

I thought he had just got back from this resort is he planning on going back there again next month.

sparepantsandtoothbrush · 20/07/2022 14:21

I thought he had just got back from this resort is he planning on going back there again next month

It literally says that in the OP.

I get you OP. DS announced his friend's family are staying 15 minutes away from us when we go to Greece in the summer holidays. Even that is too close for me!

Rainbowshit · 20/07/2022 14:25

Oh god. There's nothing worse than finding someone you know in the same hotel as you on holiday. It can be so awkward! YANBU.

Fine to go somewhere you recommended at a different time or unknowingly book at the same time. But to book knowing you'd be there, that's just weird!!

nooonakedjacuzziness · 20/07/2022 14:25

I went to Centre Parcs for the weekend a few years ago and my boss was there too (we had no idea beforehand). We kept bumping into each other - once by the entrance to the changing rooms by the pool and I was trying desperately not to let my eyes wander anywhere inappropriate! So awkward.

JauntyJinty · 20/07/2022 14:27

I found out I'm going to New York at the same time as a colleague and feel a bit odd about it! I'd have probably moved my trip a week 1 way or the other if I'd known and it didn't affect the price - and that's just 'cos we're going to the same city!

I wouldn't like it if I was going to the same resort as someone form work!

As PP asked, I wonder how big the resort is - if it's a nice big place with mulitple pools and restaurants it probably won't be too bad - just a cheery wave and move on. unless - Nightmare senario - you've already claimed your sunbed and they pitch up on the one next to you!

Welshrarebitontoast · 20/07/2022 14:27

Can you move to another hotel? Or is it too late to make any changes now?

This scenario would be my idea of hell you I get where you are coming from @malificent7 . I see enough of the people I work with in work, without needing to avoid them on leave as well.

HannahSternDefoe · 20/07/2022 14:28

We met our NDNs on holiday one year...they absolutely knew where my DP had booked.
YANBU in the slightest.