To not want work colleague to go to same resort as me at same time?

[malificent7]

I booked my summer holiday last year for August. My colleague booked his to same resort with his wife about 3 months ago after hearing where i was going. Just came back...fine.

However,him and his wife liked it so much that they are thinking about going back to same resort in August when I will be there.

Now i like my colleague but i want to get away from it all. Not bump into him on the beach. Aibu to find this odd/ unboundaried?

And no...there's nothing romantic going on.

Who has said you have to socialise with him?

If you’re not in the same hotel I genuinely wouldn’t even worry about this. It’s insane.

Yes. You do that. Im pretty certain he’ll be relieved. 😝

I would hate this too. Part of being on holiday is just putting work and my work professional persona to one side. I would be pleasant if I ran into someone but would so much rather not.

Who says you have to?
I'm really not sure what the problem is - he'll be enjoying his holiday, you yours, if you see each other, be polite. Tis all.
You're concerned over nothing.

If it's not the same hotel it'll be fine. Just say hi if you do cross paths and go on your way.

I worked with children and one year a family I worked with booked the same hotel as me! I had visions of being their babysitter 😩 I booked a few day trips ate out lots and only actually saw them twice in the whole week.

If you're not in the same hotel there is no reason why you would be expected to socialise with him, unless he is suggesting otherwise. At most you can just say "Hi" if you see them around the resort and move swiftly on.

Having seen the update that he’s not even in the same hotel (I took resort to mean hotel complex) then you are being ridiculous! Not like he’s going to be on the next sun bed or at the bar each evening.

You are creating an issue where there isn't one! You're not even in the same hotel, just say hello if your paths do cross, same as you would if you bumped into him at home somewhere on a day off!

Just because you are on holiday doesn't mean you won't meet people you know. It has happened to me in Sri Lanka and Spain! We had a little chat, laughed and went on our way.

I wouldn’t want to be at the same place over the same weeks but this seems like a coincidence and many people return to a place they like as you are doing

next time find out dates in a casual chat

You’re not even in the same hotel? This is a complete non-issue. You’re unlikely to even see each other. He probably doesn’t want to socialise with you either.

The things some people worry about never cease to amaze me.

So you both went seperately previous, which you were OK with. You're both going back again but now it happens to be the same week? But not the same hotel, just the same area. But you still think he has poor boundaries and is stepping on your toes and you think it's because he wants to socialise with you. So you're going to tell him you can't hang out

I'm assuming this is a jokey light hearted thread, right?

Yeah, either a jokey thread or a complete wind up. How very dare he.

Be very careful before you explicitly say you don't want to socialise on holiday. Do you socialise at home? This may be the last thing on his mind, he may just be taking your good recommendation for a destination. If you say you don't want to socialise with him, it could affect your future work relationship. If you bump into each other on holiday, exchange pleasantries then deflect any invites, if there are any.

I understand it being a bit odd and uncomfortable; as well as very copycat-ish for your coworker to do this... But frankly grow up. The odds of you two bumping into each other while on vacation are relitivly rare, and even if you do bump into one another you don't even have to talk to each other. You can be polite and civil enough to be like "hey nice to see you here; okay bye. See you at work and have a great vacation." Or as you said talk to him prior and let him know "hey look if we see each other, not in a rude way, but I just genuinely don't want to engage with each other outside of work" That's completely acceptable. But this seems a bit ridiculous, you sound like a petulant child who's upset that somebody is playing in 'your' sandbox....it's a public place that MANY MANY people vacation to. He may not want to run into you either; have you considered that? He'll be vacationing there with his wife. He may not even care that your there too and just thought it would be a nice place for them to go vacation in/at. Either go and enjoy yourself for you without concerning yourself with what you're co-worker and his wife being there...or reschedule/go somewhere else and don't mention where your going...