Definitely reporting now - is 101 the right number?

[PinkStarAtNight]

I started a thread the other week about whether I should report neighbours to SS because of child screaming through the night, and other things like mum being drunk in pool and not looking after the small children, smoking weed etc

Just now I've heard really really loud bangs coming from next door. No idea what it was, kind of sounded like a window being bashed closed again and again or something heavy being smashed down on worktops. Then lots of screaming from mother - 'STOP! STOP NOW' This went on for a while. It was so loud it sounded like it was coming from our upstairs (it's a semi detached)

Then child screaming and crying, sounds like same child from the other night. She is the smallest one I think. A toddler.

Then their back door opened and the crying child was pushed outside, with mother screaming 'GET OUT NOW! GET OUT THERE!...ITS TOO MUCH EMI. TOO MUCH' Then she slammed the door shut. The other kids were outside on the swings. They are a bit older but still young. They were trying to comfort small crying child.

They were saying to mum through window 'mum I can't talk to her because she just keeps asking for the door to be opened'. The mum shouted back 'No!'

A few mins later mum opened door and growled 'get in here'. Child still crying. Then I heard her say to slightly older children 'right I'm going upstairs, sort her out and DO NOT let her upstairs because honest to god I've enough.'

All is quiet now, but I really do need to report now don't I? I am in hold to 101. Have been a while now. .

Is 101 the right number? Or now everything is quiet should it be NSPCC or SS?

I live at home with my mum. She has just got home and I've told her why I'm calling 101 and she says she doesn't want me to call because she doesn't want any trouble. She thinks the police will come here and we will be in trouble with the neighbours.

What should I do?

@Tinybathroomideas I'm 25.

I think she worried that the neighbours will know its us and we'll get a brick through the window or something, as she said she's seen the mothers sister and she is even rougher than her. She said she doesn't want that woman knocking on our door.

They also look after the sister's dog a lot and are always leaving it outside for hours in all weathers and it whines and barks and tries to get back in. Also seen the kids hitting it and not being told off. So was thinking of reporting to RSPCA but I read on the website that they can't legally do anything about a dog being kept outside.

I rand 101 once after witnessing a child being screamed at and pushed by an adult in the street and the operator told me I should have called 999. Please do not hesitate. What’s in it for you? Perhaps not living with the guilt that you could have saved a child. If you really can’t bring yourself to phone the police your local council might have an out of hours number. Search for your area “social services out of hours” but honestly I wouldn’t risk it. Both child and parent sound like they need urgent help. Please call.

She smoked weed and is drunk?? Call 999 what if she kills one of the kids.

Fucking hell, OP just report and call the police.

So many excuses, how many times do you need to hear this before you’ll actually do something? Maybe you’ll pipe up when an ambulance is called and someone’s hurt? Or worse? By then it’ll be too late.

You’re 25, you aren’t a baby. If my mum dared say that shite to have a nice BBQ she’d be told to fuck off and the police would be called.

I can’t believe you’re just sat posting on Mumsnet instead of calling the police considering what has just happened. Give me strength.

I can't believe no one has called on me yet. Especially when mine were screaming 'no mummy no' the other night at the top of their lungs because I'd got a bin bag out for their toys after they'd been asked to tidy their room 4 million times and I'd gone in to them bouncing on the bed and I'd once again nearly broken my neck on the sea of toys on the floor.

Ok, you're taking the time to write about a dog on an internet forum but you've haven't made a phone call or reported online ?? You could have done it already.
I apologise if you have.

As a Child Protection Lawyer, I urge you to report this anonymously to the police and also to the Out of Hours Social Services line. A Google search will be able to help you find the number for your local office. They will then be able to carry out an urgent welfare check. It may be nothing. But it might be something.

Please do ring them ignore your mum. There's a case local to me neighbours ignored the slapping noises and the child screaming. Just because they didn't want to fall out with the neighbours.

What makes it worse is they were fostering the baby to adopt. Please don't ignore it if children are suffering. It could save a child's or children's life.

www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-cumbria-61317886.amp

DO IT.

And shame on your mother.

If you think someone is in danger you call 999. Otherwise I agree with your mother, what are you getting out of being on here?

I would ring 999 to report her disgraceful poor children

@Changenameobviousreasons

My dd is very like yours. Blood curdling screams over absolutely nothing. Kicking the house to bits, throwing things and the screaming. It goes on for hours. There's nothing up with her. My dd gets sent to a different room to me so she can calm down. It's the only thing that works and the only reason I shout is because she can't hear me when she goes off on one.

I'm guessing there's more to this than this incident the op has described.

Heartbroken for this child :(

I understand these sentiments, I have two toddlers and some of the tantrums are just ridiculous. From the outside it probably sounds horrendous.

However it isn’t every day. We both work and look like functioning adults. The kids are clean, well fed and well dressed. Neighbours would see us constantly coming and going throughout the week taking them out places. They’d see them playing happily in the garden, etc. We also have a puppy who they’d see us walk, play with in the garden, who is healthy and thriving.

What OP describes just seems like pure hell 24/7. You might not see what goes on indoors but neighbours can see a dog being abused in the garden so it doesn’t take long to put two and two together.

Really this should have been reported a long time ago.

I remember your other thread OP … and I’m sorry to sound so horrible, but you’re unbelievably pathetic in not reporting these incidents!
It should be, and last time should have been, 999. Either this isn’t happening and you’re trolling, or worse, it is real and you’re allowing a potential horrific situation to continue.
There are many ways to do this anonymously. 999 is the safest option for help now.

You can report online on the NSPCC website and it'll go to your local social services. Include the history. Even if nothing comes of it, the report may end up useful for them to spot a pattern eventually.

Joined this forum to say that after my own quite recent experience, I would definitely agree with other posters advising NOT to contact the police or social services. Not unless you feel there is serious and immediate harm to the child. I don't feel that what you're describing meets that criteria. You could post a little note through the door and say that you noticed the mother was having a hard time and would she like to have a coffee sometime, or a note to that effect with some local services she could go to for help.

I was experiencing depression and anxiety and the DWP contacted social services after I applied for benefits. This led to my child being briefly removed after I had a panic attack when SS visited and they called the police, my child was taken and left with my abusive family for a couple of days, though I did not give my consent and told them specifics of why it wasn't safe (previously-abusive alcoholic living there, for one thing). Police and SS were supposed to do things but didn't and after the couple of days there had been no contact at all with SS or police and I had to go to a solicitor who helped immeasurably and my child was then soon home. We were monitored with a weekly home visit by SS for a few weeks and signed off. The harm to me and my child was massive. My child had to ride in a police car FFS! They have never apologised even though SS admitted that child should never have been taken. SS also became involved with school and lied several times to cover their own mistakes and ineptitude I believe, but had the effect of making me look bad. The experience did not convey 1 iota of benefit to either of us, in any way, though I've been badly struggling. SS in their report recommended I receive help from the NHS which has never happened. I've eventually received benefits backdated which are paying for private healthcare and see a little light at the end of the tunnel finally. The system is broken - I now do not trust the system.

I have never had experienced SS or police intervention prior to this, only heard vague bad stories and vague OK stories but I would beg anyone to think very carefully before intervening. The first tenet of all social institutions should be the same as medicine 'first, do no harm'. I can't imagine that these people actually help people. Their only useful function is to protect kids from awful situations by removing them. If you think it's bad enough that the kids would be better off in a children's home, then call. That's the reality as I see it now.

I've reported online to police and NSPCC for a similar incident. It seemed to have worked.

I've got a 4yo, 3yo and 8mo.

My three year old screams like a banshee when she's not getting her own way and like yours she's inclined to shout "no, no, mummy no, please, no" ... in our case it's when I prise the tablet from her hands at bed time after 10 minutes of telling her it's lights out.

My 4yo has special needs and repeats phrases he has heard on television or YouTube, unfortunately one he picked up is shouting "AAAAAAAH SOMEBODY HELPPPPP!"

He also throws things and has been known to break TVs, mirrors, cups etc.

I've been bracing myself for a knock on the door since they were toddlers. Thank god the OP isn't my neighbour.

@puffalo never thought about it like that, my neighbours will see and hear us all chatting and playing and going out and about more than dd kicks off. She kicks off multiple times a day but has undiagnosed additional needs.

For fuck's sake call 999 and stop starting these attention seeking threads.

You can report to SS anonymously.

I reported a family member on a Saturday, I said I was a relative, was able to give the kids schools and their DOBs so they knew I wasn't reporting maliciously.

They contacted the person on the Monday, said a report had been made and asked if there was any evidence to it. The person broke down and admitted domestic violence and abuse in the home.

(Ì know because they later asked me if I reported it and I admitted it)

Please make the call.

Call 999, you have a duty to.

My mum would beat the shit out of me when I displayed challenging behaviour. Beat me with a saw once too, left scars for 10 years that one. Or inflict wierd punishments so horrible they are genuinely unbelievable. People did fuck all (SS included in fairness), because she was both very scary and very intelligent, so intimidating. And on drugs.

I really wish someone (well, a couple briefly tried) had said/done something. It has affected much of the rest of my life really. Due to this, I wholeheartedly believe children should be safeguarded by anyone who has genuine concerns. The potential risk of not reporting is too great. Phone the police OP. And google children's services for the area and phone them too.

What is that thread please? Do you have a link? @littleblackno