Baby after 38 when you already have a teen - Yes or no?

[SnBLurker]

Hi,

Just that. I'm deliberately keeping it simple.

YABU (no) = Too late under the circumstances

YANBU (yes) = Go for it

I think if your in your mid to late 30's with a teenager it would be very hard to go back to go back to looking after a newborn. If your child is already a teenager your dealing with hormones, exams and preparing them for life as an adult.
Your also getting to the stage when you will have more free time and are not planning holidays around the school terms.

I know a lady who had another child when her daughter was around 11/12. The 2 nd child started to display certain things as they got older and they have autism.

When the 2nd child was around 6 the mother had another baby. The child with autism found it very hard when the baby came and over time has gotten harder to deal with.
Meanwhile her oldest daughter had to get through her teens and try to study for her A levels when all this was happening at home. She had to stay at home when she was in college because her parents could not afford for her to live away.

After she finished in college she got a job and lived at home for a while. She then went travelling with friends. I can't see her coming back to the UK for a while and she won't move back home either.

In your mid 30's plus some woman can feel a bit hormonal and possibly think it now or never to try for another baby. You need to consider as well as you get older you have a higher chance of having a special needs child as well. This can have a major impact on your life and the life of the child or children you already have.
I would be thankful for the child or children you already have. Enjoy being in the position of moving towards them being more independent and you having more free time.

Threads like these make me feel broody. Until daytime hits and I realise how tough it is with 2 ...got 3rd one due next month and think why did I not think about this. Would love one when I'm 38 but I'm tired hence why early and get it over and done with.

I know the op is old but just got to say my DC are 26, 20 and 5 and no regrets here at all. Nor has the small one affected my freedom to a hug degree

💯 if you want to go for it then do. I wouldn’t give a flying f**k what anyone else thought. Reasonable to ask as if you are curious to know what the consensus is but if your heart wants to go for it then do. ❤️

I had a 10 1/2 year old and an 8 year old and thought our family was complete. I got pregnant again and did not realise as still bleeding for first two months so thought it odd I missed period in month 3 but only tested 2 weeks later when sore boobs and needing the loo all the time to wee. I was 14 weeks then. I wasn't certain but didn't think I could have an abortion. I had baby. When he was born DD was 11 and elder DS almost 9. It was fine. Now all 3 grown up and DS1 and DS2 best of friends. I've never been sorry I had my 3rd DC. The large age gap just didn't cause any problems.

Imagine having to pick up your drunk teen with a baby in tow
Never sleeping again during the night for a year whilst having to deal with a cranky teen
Having a special needs baby considering your age and a teen at the same time

.... it sounds all cute and all to have a baby

But it wouldnt be fair or nice or easy for anyone

Depends. If you had the teenager very young and have met a new husband/partner in your later years then I think it's fine to have another baby.

So long as you keep your teen in mind.

Oh this is a zombie thread. Sigh

I think it's fine if it's what you want, but would be, essentially, two only kids.

🧟‍♀️ 🧟‍♂️ 🧟

Zombie thread.

Op could be 7 months pregnant by now!

For me personally, no way.