Page 7 | Friend didn't give me a discount ....aibu?

Playingchesswithpigeons · 07/07/2022 14:52

Just text her, rather than call. You still have time ...
" Hiya, oops, I forgot to ask when we spoke, would you have a voucher for our special meal tonight?"
Her reply will confirm she's either a cotton headed ninnymuggins & just didn't think OR you will no longer offer EVER a discount/perk or favour again.

Flopisfatteningbingforchristmas · 07/07/2022 14:53

sofaslofas · 07/07/2022 13:45

Yeah I sound like such a terrible friend saving her hundreds of pounds over the years .....yet she can't return the favour
Yes dreadful

Classic MN. Aibu - every says yes but then OP says no I’m not.

Lweji · 07/07/2022 14:55

It is quite possible that the company´s rules have changed and that they became stricter. Possibly because their employees were giving out their discounts to all their friends. Who knows? 😁

AryaStarkWolf · 07/07/2022 14:56

YABU

allgoodabc · 07/07/2022 14:56

sofaslofas · 07/07/2022 13:14

My best friend of over 30 years ...her partner works at a well known chain restaurant that isn't the cheapest.
They get 33% staff discount for that restaurant (any in country) and 40% off other restaurants owned by same company.
To use the discount her partner logs into his staff portal and downloads a voucher which is sent to email and you have 24hours to use it.
You can use a discount voucher every day.
Every time it's my birthday she gets him to get one and he forwards it to her and she gets the 40% off my birthday meal.

Tonight I'm taking my partner to this particular restaurant and when she asked what my plans were I told her -and she didn't offer to get me a discount voucher and just said "have fun"
Now it would cost them nothing to get me a discount voucher

I used to work in a department store and every time she came in I made sure to serve her and she got 30% off
This was off beauty /clothes /homeware even a sofa.
So I've saved her a fortune over the years.

Aibu to think it's a bit tight not getting me a voucher?
These vouchers have no names or anything
Literally just a QR code

There will be a good reason for this, so a bit wrong you are assuming the worst.
I once had a family member pass me on a log in for a streaming service (it was at a time when the streaming service wasn’t too strict about this sort of thing so you could have a load of log ins). I said “great, is it yours?” they said no - that it was the log in of a guy who they met at a party who was saying it was fine for them to use it 😆he was even from another country! Needless to say I didn’t use this poor man’s log in details. The thing is with these sorts of benefits or loopholes there’s always the risk of you push it too far your benefits will be shut down. No problem if a few people are logging into one account from different locations, but really silly to think you could stretch this to family members of friends of friends without consequences. Immediate family/ inner circle is fine, but if you start extending beyond that, and you won’t have been the only person to heavily hint you want this discount, your friend potentially starts getting into fraud territory really quickly.
I think you are being unreasonable, and if I was her I’d be slightly irritated that something given as an occasional and sweet gift for you was undermined by you pushing your luck for your husband. As someone who has often been able to give people freebies through jobs I always hated it when people came back to ask for more, made me feel like a chump rather than a thoughtful friend.

AryaStarkWolf · 07/07/2022 14:57

sofaslofas · 07/07/2022 13:34

Well for two mains,2 starters and 2 drinks each it's around £120
So not cheap
I'm not a CF
But after years of her asking for discounts ..it would have been nice to have the favour returned.

It's her birthday and I take her for a meal ...my birthday we have to go somewhere she can use the discount vouchers

So why didn't you just ask her then? Maybe her partner had already given the voucher for that day away or something

Meraas · 07/07/2022 15:02

AryaStarkWolf · 07/07/2022 14:57

So why didn't you just ask her then? Maybe her partner had already given the voucher for that day away or something

Show quote history

Maybe OP didn't ask her friend because her friend also doesn't ask to use OP's store discount... and yet turns up on a day that is OP working, at a till that OP is working on.

10HailMarys · 07/07/2022 15:07

sofaslofas · 07/07/2022 13:45

Yeah I sound like such a terrible friend saving her hundreds of pounds over the years .....yet she can't return the favour
Yes dreadful

You sound like a terrible friend because you think friendship is a financial transaction.

Get a grip. You don't know what the rules are for her boyfriend using his discount, so pipe down. Eat somewhere else if you can't afford the chain her boyfriend works for.

kateandme · 07/07/2022 15:07

ShirleyPhallus · 07/07/2022 13:48

So many things on mumsnet would be solved if people just talked to each other

This! All these people say friends in their opening posts and this wouldn't even be a thing with my(if true) friends.
We'd either have said
● oh give us a voucher luv.
●she would have done it anyway.
●i wouldn't bare a grudge to post on here and just assume it's one of those things,she either forgot or didn't think.
●Or id talk to her.but not even "talk" to her.this implies to much on the talk but when really it would be a non conversation,rolled in, had ,done ,next.

Also op you say it's got no info on it. It will every time a staff member swipes their card it's recorded.every action they take it monitored down to a tee.so you might not see info taken but it would be on the system under his name.

Laiste · 07/07/2022 15:07

But it's not the friend's discount. It's her husbands lace of work.
The comparison with OPs discount is not an equal footing.

OP was happy to risk using her discount to her mate.

OP is expecting her mate's HUSBAND's workplace discount to be handed out to his wife's mate and her partner.

toomuchlaundry · 07/07/2022 15:08

That's a high discount, can't imagine they can afford for friends of staff members to use it. I'm sure there would be a policy for this.

I also imagine your retail store did too and you could have been in trouble handing out discounts to your mates

SleepSleepRaveAsleep · 07/07/2022 15:08

My sister worked somewhere for a while where they had amazing discount which the company allowed employees to pass onto friends and family, then one day they changed the rules. Discounts could only be used for the member of staff and their household, they monitored the items being bought to make sure people weren't buying for other people. I'd assume there has been some sort of clamp down on people sharing their discount with the masses, so they aren't offering it to everyone, you included unfortunately.

stratforduponavon · 07/07/2022 15:09

I suspect she is not meant to do this. Otherwise she could be passing discounts to a cast of thousands! Being caught will be instant dismissal but its worth doing every so often so its worth the risk?? I think you have assumed that giving you the discount with the QR code on means that no one will ever know.

My son worked in a well known supermarket and one of the staff passed her discount card to a friend. After all - who would know?? There wasnt a picture on it etc etc. Well the company did spot checks. She was fired.

Moonchair1 · 07/07/2022 15:09

Yanbu things like this wind me too op

DuckBilledPlattyJoobs · 07/07/2022 15:11

Marvellousmadness · 07/07/2022 13:22

You sound like a terrible friend...

Oh give over 🙄

AryaStarkWolf · 07/07/2022 15:11

Meraas · 07/07/2022 15:02

Maybe OP didn't ask her friend because her friend also doesn't ask to use OP's store discount... and yet turns up on a day that is OP working, at a till that OP is working on.

Show quote history

She literally says in the post I quoted "after years of her asking for discounts" though?

MyneighbourisTotoro · 07/07/2022 15:11

I’m sorry OP but you sound incredibly entitled.
It’s nice to help friends and family out with store discounts when possible but it should never be expected!

Meraas · 07/07/2022 15:14

She literally says in the post I quoted "after years of her asking for discounts" though?

Turning up at a time and till that OP works is asking for a discount without having to say the words. I think OP wants the same (rightly or wrongly).

AryaStarkWolf · 07/07/2022 15:14

Also, how come the discount is less in the restaurant he actually works in, that's a bit odd isn't it?

SeemsSoUnfair · 07/07/2022 15:19

It is gross misconduct at our place of work to abuse the staff discount, we can gift but we cannot buy on behalf of anyone. Same with ds who works for a food chain, he can buy food for others, but he must be there eating as well.

I would never ask for or expect a discount from others. Even if it was offered I would check they were allowed before using it as I wouldn't want to feel responsible for putting anyone in an awkward position.

YABU. If you are allowed to use your staff discount for others that is great, but don't expect others are allowed to do the same.

AryaStarkWolf · 07/07/2022 15:21

Meraas · 07/07/2022 15:14

She literally says in the post I quoted "after years of her asking for discounts" though?

Turning up at a time and till that OP works is asking for a discount without having to say the words. I think OP wants the same (rightly or wrongly).

As others have pointed out though it isn't her discount to hand out like it was with the OP, it's her partners

catandcoffee · 07/07/2022 15:23

OP I get what your saying but you've put your own job at risk by allowing her to use your discount.

Your friend had no issue with that... think about it.

She is not prepared to do the same for you... think about that

Meraas · 07/07/2022 15:25

AryaStarkWolf · 07/07/2022 15:21

As others have pointed out though it isn't her discount to hand out like it was with the OP, it's her partners

Show quote history

I get that, but I maintain that the friend is sly with OP.

Also, she was happy enough for OP to use her discount on her and risk getting into trouble.

Greenberg · 07/07/2022 15:27

Meraas · 07/07/2022 14:41

@XenoBitch

WHat have I misunderstood?
OP's friend does not work at the restaurant. It is not her discount to give out. She uses it on OPs birthday, when she is at the meal too.
OP is wanting to use a discount for when her friend is not there.

--------

My point is that when it's the friend's birthday, she doesn't want to eat it in the restaurant where she gets a discount, and yet when it's OP's birthday (and the friend is paying), then she does want to eat there.

That is sly and grabby behaviour.

I can see why OP is annoyed by that.

So do I.

OP you don't want to ask her for the discount then you could maybe next time it's your birthday say you want to eat somewhere else. Why should her discount trump your choice of restaurant on your birthday.

Bubblebubblebah · 07/07/2022 15:28

Also, she was happy enough for OP to use her discount on her and risk getting into trouble.

Like she would probs hers used on OP. Again. This discount is not hers to givesome people have so weirdly blurred work/home boundaries, I am starting to think how many actually ever worked