To ask how many of your social circle...

[TheLostNights]

Are still together/married and if they have kids, how old are they?
I felt really depressed reading another thread where someone said that most couples divorce or split once the kids have reached the end of primary school and that if they are married, the husband will most likely be cheating or up to no good in other ways.
Aibu to say good marriages on the whole are common?
My social circle of friends (About 7 of us) are still happily married and our kids range from 3-12 years. Aibu to say we are not the minority?!

I'm in my 40s and most people I know who met their partners or got in their 20s are now divorced or separated. I'd say a good 75%. Not all of them had kids. In fact, some separated due to wanting/not wanting kids. The only affairs I know of is a women who ran off with another bloke after she found out her husband was infertile. He was a twat as well and I'm secretly glad she got shot of him but he didn't deserve that really.

That should say got married.

I have more than one social circle!
College friends we are all divorced or widowed
Playground Mums crowd - all DC adults but we socialise still, 4 happily married, 2 single, 2 divorced and dating, 2 who are happily married for second time
Other group of friends, 3 happily married, 2 single, 2 who are happily married for 3rd time, 1 divorced and dating
age range 40s to 70s across all groups

My best friends are a group of 4 including me. 3 of us still married. 1 getting divorced. Interestingly the one getting divorced is the only one whose parents are still together.
My 3 best friends from previous work place (one being male) all of us still married.
My currently very small department of 3 - all still married.
All in our 40s/ early 50s. And first marriages for all the females. A couple of the men have been married before.

My sets of close friends who are divorced didn't have kids but got married fairly young. My sets of still-married friends all have kids of secondary school age and there are no divorces in that group.

I only have one married friend with kids who is getting divorced. Kids are 21 and 18 and her husband walked out on Christmas Day (what a charmer!) To be honest, I never thought much of him (nor did her sister) and she definitely settled and then he leached off her for years.

We're in our 40's. Most of our friends aren't divorced, we're starting to hit 20th anniversaries.

Of those that are, only one has DC & only one discovered an affair.

I’m 49 and have a lot of social circles across several countries, and only know three couples who have divorced in total — all three had children. In two of the three divorces, no other people were involved. I can think of a few marriages that have survived infidelity and one renegotiated as an open marriage that appears to be thriving.

I’m in my late 30’s and out of all of the couples I have seen get married in the last 15ish years, 3 couples have now divorced. That includes all of our family of similar age and friends from school/university/work etc. so I would say divorce stats are low for our social circle

Early 50s. I’d say about a quarter of my friendship group who married have since divorced. (Including me). Which is probably not bad statistically.

I have to say all the couples I know who married under the age of 25 are all divorced bar one and they are both disabled.

I think the younger you are when you settle down the higher your chances of divorce are. I think getting married very early - pre 25 - is a very bad idea unless you both plan to do nothing with your lives and I would be livid if my daughter tried this.

In my circle, most couples have DC in their mid to late twenties and have been married around the 30 year mark. There have been a handful of separations in the last couple of years, though.

Not a long period of time to cover but, in my dhs circle of 10 they're all still married and kids range 10-0years. In my circle of 6 close friends only 2 of us are still with the fathers of our kids

Set of college friends ..all married for over 35 years with dc..two divorced out of 8 the rest happily married still.

General friend group of 8 all married over 35 years with dc..no divorces..all pretty content with their lives with close relationships.

Family including inlaws..11 couples all married from 20 to 35 years ..with dc .one divorce.
So looks pretty good all round.

I hardly know anyone who is divorced - a couple of people who are parents at DC school and a couple of DH friends who married in 20s and now remarried. But none of my close circle - we mostly married late so that might help! Although I do know a few couples who've been together since teens/uni. We mostly have young kids so I guess we'll see what happens as they get closer to secondary age!!! I'm 43 and friends are similar.

Around half. My kids are adults. We split when youngest was 18

Most people I know spilt up with their partners despite having dc. Me and DH haven't though, still happily married.

I voted yabu unreasonable as divorce is not necessarily bad. It can be a good thing. Adjustment is hard, but don't catastrophise, it's not like your life is going to be worse. It is hard to begin with but it gets better, so it's a long overdue FRESH START 9 times out of 10

Most people still married. Only know a few divorced couples, one is a close friend of mine, both husband and wife were having affairs. In all the cases the woman initiated the divorce.

Of our 3 sets of closest friends:

One child free couple, divorced after 18 years together, following his affair.

One couple with 2 young (under 3) children, recently separated after 20 years together, following his affair

One couple with 2 DC who are early teens, still together after 24 years.

Me and DH with teen about to go to uni, still together after 21 years.

There is no such thing as a perfect marriage. There is always secrets without exception

Out of my immediate social circle
Closest friend of 40 years married and divorced twice. Then a 12 year relationship until his death 4 years ago. Now in another steady relationship.
Friend = married left due to DV married again for 26 years now divorced
Friend = married , dh left married again dh committed suicide. Single for 31years.
Friend Gay.( male) Together 24 years married 8
Friend ( lesbian) together 14 years married 9.
Actually thinking about it I'm the only one that has been with same partner for more than 30 years in our social group!

We're a group of 4 couples in our friendship group. All 4 couples are still together (2 not married, 2 married). Kids range from 5-1 years old so obviously younger than the OP is really discussing. Interestingly, as a pp mentioned their parents, all parents of all parties within our friendship group are still married and mostly in their 60s (we are in our early 30s).

I’m just turned 40 and don’t know anyone else my age who is divorced, kids or not. It hasn’t been an easy transition I have to say.

I’m still happily married (DC are 9 and 17)
Of 4 couples (closest friends)
2 happily married kids all 9-18
1 happily together with mid-primary school DC
1 with late teen DC was widowed while DC were young, I’d imagine they’d have still been together.

Wider circle are a mix of together or I’ve only met them since they’ve had their youngest family so some of the men have older DC then divorced.

Between me and my team only us (me being the youngest) and one couple (woman in her 70’s) are still together, all 5 others are late middle age and have all divorced after their children were all in their 20’s and 30’s.

Like others, several social circles.
Old school friends are either still married, or still single (all early 50s).
Uni friends are partnered up/married in last five years or so (mostly in their late 20s/early 30s. One got divorced last year after a short marriage).
School parent circle - two divorced (one since I have known them)one considering separation, several single. (Aged 30s- 50s).

I'm a widow after a 30 year marriage. There were definitely moment that were less than perfect and MN would have said we should split at times, but as with all aspects of life there are ups and downs.

Among our main friendship group were two couples who have been together similar amount of time. One couple who both divorced (from other people) in their late 50s when dcs left home and have now been together about 5 years and one couple who got together a bit later in life and have been together 15 years, no DC although they both have children fro previous relationships that ended when DC were in primary school.

Since I've been "single" though I've developed more friendships with single acquaintances, so my main friendship group are now a single mother with a history of horrible men, a happily single woman in her 40s with a very nice comfortable life, an ex addict builder, a divorced man (divorced at 30 with children aged 7-10) with a string of much younger girlfriends, a divorced man of 50 (no children , divorced at 43) desperate to find someone to love, a very attractive and successful young woman who has lots of dates but no intention of settling, a divorced man (divorced as children went to uni) who spends a lot of time caring for grandchildren and pining over a woman he can't have.

Actually, the single women are in a much better place than the single men 😆