To ask how many of your social circle...

[TheLostNights]

Are still together/married and if they have kids, how old are they?
I felt really depressed reading another thread where someone said that most couples divorce or split once the kids have reached the end of primary school and that if they are married, the husband will most likely be cheating or up to no good in other ways.
Aibu to say good marriages on the whole are common?
My social circle of friends (About 7 of us) are still happily married and our kids range from 3-12 years. Aibu to say we are not the minority?!

Hardly anybody to be honest. I am in my early 50s.

Out of a friendship group aged 35-40

One is living with a long term partner and child but has definately settled and isn't 100% happy

One is living with a husband but isn't happy older teen DS

One married at 25 and found out her MOH had been seeing DH both before and after marriage. They divorced ASAP and she is on her second marriage with two young DC

Two married at 24 and 26 both separated within a year and are with new partners. Both have went on to have further DC aged 35ish

One had a LTR separated aged 27 when child was 4 and is now married aged 38. No more children.

I'm 40 and just totting up how weddings I've attended have ended in a split. A good 30% I'd say. Two family members plus older in law couple split 3 years ago who had married before I came into the family. Two of my DH's close friends. Three of mine, two this year.

Majority in my main group still together, other individual friends have separated and went through other half cheating or being an arse. So overall I woukd 60pc together and 40 not. X

Uni friends are all still married to people they met at uni, including me and DH, or shortly after, some with children and some not. Friends from my school age and dh's school age are about 85% still married. We pretty much all got married in out late 20s / early 30s.

In my experience and social circle most of the separations/divorces/affairs come when the children are older teens.

I have 12 married couple friends. None are divorced - all children are over 13.

We are early 40s. None of our close school or uni friends are divorced. Come to think of it only one of my newer friends is. Many of us have been together since our late teens or early twenties.

Only 1 of my DDs friends has separated parents. That's probably not the norm though! She is our youngest at 8, but for our 14 year old we are in the minority still being together and - very happily - married. We married, and had DC, very young which seems to make us even more unusual.

Our social circle is indeed mostly long term, happily married couples.

Married 16 years (together many more) and have 15 and 12 year olds. Still happy. No affairs etc. Most of my friends are similar though the strength of relationships vary so I have friends who are fairly unhappily married.

We are in our 40's kids 11-16 married 20 years. Nearly all our friends are still married, for similar lengths of time although there kids are mostly older than ours. I am actually struggling to think of friends that have separated or divorced and of them all I think only one has parents who are divorced.

Professionals, London. Most are co-habiting, only 1 couple in 6 at 40 is married (the gay guys). Only 2 have kids. Most met later on or are on second long term relationship.

No divorces as noone is married.

School friends - 4 on 1st marriage incl. 1 same sex (0 divorces, 0 separations) ... 3 w/ kids uni/sec school.
College friends - never really kept in touch, but those that did still on 1st marriage.
Current Social circle - 3 on 1st marriage, 2 on 2nd marriage, 1 LTR, 1 single.
Ironically me and my 2 siblings all on 1st marriage, but 2nd marriage for each of our partners.

Interesting question. My oldest children are in their 20s. Most couples are still together, but dd is very aware that many couples, like us, would have split if it was financially viable when the kids were younger. Many of them are aware of conflict between the parents. Not terrible, abusive marriages, but couples have definitely had enough of each other. It’s sad really.

I'm pushing mid-forties and all the marriages in our friendship group remain in tact but a few of those who had long term partnerships have dissolved but not all, by a long shot. I'm not sure how beyond normal that is or why that might be - I wouldn't say that there was anything particularly distinct about us as a bunch to explain it.

All but two are separated or divorced. I’m going to say 8/9 couples, obviously I know a lot more but I’m just counting close friends here.

The two couples still together are the couple who had their first child together at 16, split for a year maybe and got back together, got married and had 3 more children. They are 47 now and first grandchild due any day. Very happily married as far as I know. Her husband is amazing, type who never had to be asked to change a nappy, he’d get up after a night shift and cook the evening meal (she was a SAHM for many years). Kids all grown up now.

Second couple they didn’t get married until they were 35 and 45, first marriage, two kids. Been married 11yrs. Kids are 10 and 6. Seem very happy but some definite financial issues going on (she’s a SAHM, he has a lot of cash squirrelled away in his name only)

Sorry thought of a 3rd couple. Not married, 2 kids under 12. I’d say not that happy, friend thought she would be left on the shelf, settled for him but has never seen to be that into him. Been engaged for over 12yrs, she doesn’t want to marry him!

Couples who divorced / separated all have kids under 13

Closest friends are six couples, early 50s. One widowed, one divorced (fairly early and now happily remarried) everyone else still together. Just doing silver weddings…

Does seem unusual amongst wider circle (compared with parents of DC)

One group 5 friends. One married quote young at 19 and got divorced in her early 20s. Has been with her 2nd DH fir over 20 years. All the rest of us are still married.

Another group of friends, we're all still married apart from one couple and I don't think cheating was the issue.

What do you think is the reason it didn't work out or perhaps the secret to the ones that are still together?

We have several social circles. I would say out of roughly 22/23 couples, there is only 1 who is divorced (she remarried our friend and they’re still together) we are all early 30s.

Of my friends, 2 of us are lone parents (relationships ended), 5 married. 3 of those married are to their teenage boyfriends. They all seem happily married to me.

Hmm, I’ve just realised actually out of uni friends only two out of 6 are still married to first husbands!

All of my friends are still married. Not sure all marriages are happy but everyone is together. Most got together in their 30s. Most have kids.
One cousin of mine is divorced and one of the school mums is recently divorced but the rest are all together.

6 friends from n my circle…

2 unhappily married & absolutely should split
2 divorced
2 in long term relationships but unmarried

all have children