What’s the sad reality about life that you had to learn?

[YouAreNotBatman]

To me it was how little people actually care about other’s.

And how lonely and isolating life can be, even as an adult, if you just don’t ”fit in” with the norm.

That adult children don't share the burden to help their elderly parents in there old age. Watching my mum shoulder the whole burden of caring for my gran and the effect this is having on her, watching how unhappy she is, is torture, knowing what jammy lives my uncles and cousins are living.

This. I was raised to believe that if you studied hard you would have good opportunities and do well. In actual fact it’s all about wealth and connections and building rapport. You can be an absolute genius with amazing skills, but if you’re not attractive, popular, rich or well connected, you’re wasting your time. I see 1st class graduates working in Asda and dropouts being handed Daddy’s company on a plate.

Don't eat yellow snow

Don’t.

I’m much happier with my vibrator!

This. It’s utterly devastating when you hit a crisis or trauma, and those you have helped in the past are far too wrapped up in themselves to offer any actual, real support, and simply text sending their platitudes.

We’re all lucky to have something we can always rely on, except for when the batteries run out that is!

That some women will defend men at all costs. Despite the overwhelming evidence to the contrary.

Pick me pick me, i'm not like the other bitches.

Sad.

They weren't stupid, they were deliberately misled.

Power is nearly always corrupt or corrupt-able.

That you need to start saving for your pension the moment you start paid work. (I didn't. No one told me).

That learning, reading books and education in general is never, ever wasted.

That someone's death can mean a new start, a new beginning.

That mothers and single mothers in particular - will be judged harshly by someone out there for just about everything we do. Therefore the most important thing to do is trust ourselves and our intuition and instincts.

That there are advantages to being a dressed down, middle-aged woman without make up. You escape the male gaze for a while. Many men do not notice you and assume you are stupid. That way you can surprise the hell out of them with unexpected, intelligent actions.

Life's not fair

You can care.
You can still be slapped in the face by people who take advantage of that.
And at some point, you may have to cut your loses and walk away because continuing to try to help and to care isn't doing either party any good.
You can only only help those who want to be helped and crucially are willing to help themselves too.

yeah in primary school I was part of such a group - they exist but they're not all that exist by the way of women's only cliques. I was part of the 'in' clique at the school gates once, it wasn't at all as exclusionary as it might have seemed just a bunch of women who'd already known each other for years through older sibs and toddler groups. The horrible "Gossip" other people probably thought we were having was telling me all the stuff I needed to know like which day they needed yellow socks and what they had to bring for the school fair on Friday (I'm terrible about that sort of thing) and supporting each other throughs SEN assessments, sleep deprivation, money troubles, divorce, everything really that you might find on Mumsnet and the school newsletter.

I thought that quote was 'the love of power is corrupt'
...

just like the quote 'the love of money is the root of all evil'

not money as such.

This is my truth too 🙁

Mars bars are smaller than they were. Cunts.

Circumstances can change in an instant through illness/ bad luck.

not everyone had the same start in life, some are much much much luckier than others

This really bothers me and I find it baffling when there seems to be plenty of public money for other things or people.

Blimey that's a brave thing to say on here. Because on MN it is always, unequivocally, 100% your fault. (I don't, just so we're clear)
The sad reality of MN is that it pretends to be a supportive place for parents but in reality there are scores of smug mummies just aching to put the boot in.

That I am completely lacking in the skills required to make serious amounts of money.

That so called democracies in Europe that are being run by faceless technocrats that are voted and/or employed from within, wield the most enormous power here in Europe in 2022 and no one knows who they are. The European president can not be removed, and she isn’t answerable to anyone.
It scares me that there is now an autocratic system that has been created, and it worries me greatly how the populations of the member nations have had no say in its evolution or the direction it will take in the future despite the impact on their lives.

Life can turn on a sixpence.

Germaine Greer once wrote that “women have no idea how much men hate them”

As a young woman I refused to believe it. Now a couple of decades on I absolutely agree with her.

Our hard fought rights are being rolled back at speed. Our ‘permission’ to even name ourselves removed. Women who dare speak out are threatened, punished and silenced. Our bodies still bought, sold, raped, abused and murdered so much it’s rarely newsworthy.

It is heartbreaking and frightening.

It's quite simple, not baffling at all. People would rather disabled people didn't exist, and certainly do not want their tax money going to them.

I second this. But they all suddenly appear at the Will reading!

That many opportunities are within your grasp.