Should a male teacher have done this?

[mycatisannoying]

During a residential school trip, enter a girls' shared dorm to wake them up?
To my mind it's a safeguarding issue, and there was also a female teacher on the trip who could have done it.
I wanted to seek others' opinions before raising it.
Thanks.

Of course a teacher in charge has the responsibility of waking the kids up. Wtf ???

I’ve worked with a few male primary school teachers before and they’ve said how almost impossible it is to do anything without it coming across as weird or creepy. They can’t offer a hug, many of the young children will just run up and hug you but they feel awkward to hug back. In this situation yes it would have been ideal if it had been a female teacher but presumably the door was wide open and there was a group of them so it wasn’t like he was going in a dorm with one child alone. Anyone is able to be a creep though so I think gender in school situations comes into it more than necessary at times. I remember school trips with female staff we had to get changed in front of and I felt weird about that as a 10 year old but somehow just because they were women it was seen as completely fine. I mean it was fine but it’s just the idea that we would never suspect a female teacher but we’re so ready to jump on any move a male teacher makes. It’s a bad enough job as it is, especially on a residential 🤣 the poor guy probably can’t wait to get home to his family

Really?

He could've knocked loudly on the door and called out. Simple. No need to go inside the room is there?

If the teacher knocked, opened the door, took a step in and just switched the lights on or talked to them to wake them up, I don't see any issue.

The female teacher might'd been needed elsewhere.

I wonder if we'll ever find out how he woke them up?

I mean it's not like it's ever so slightly relevant 🙄

Oh OP you’ve got it in for him regardless even though he didn’t do anything wrong. Makes you come across as a bit petty and desperate. Your poor DD, let’s hope she doesn’t take on your traits.

It wouldn’t cross my mind to think about it. Surely he’s been checked to be around children?

As both a CSA survivor and someone who has supervised similar trips and received safeguarding training for doing so he should have known better - if only to protect himself from allegations

It's drummed into people in his position what is and isn't good practice

This wasn't good practice.

Shocked and appalled tbh that mothers of which I think most respondents will be don't think there is a problem with this.

Less shocked as it seems to be not known/understood that inappropriate behaviour and even abuse can and does happen when others are present even other adults.

Plenty on this thread I think need to catch on to how prevalent CSA actually is

Just poking head into the room / standing at door and telling them to get up?
Wouldn't see that as a problem at all, in fact I remember my teachers doing that when I was at primary/high school on residential trips and never thinking anything of it!

Surely he’s been checked to be around children?

All any kind of background check proves is that a person has never been caught doing something they shouldn't

My abuser my father passed stringent background checks during the period of the abuse. Nobody suspected anything even people who were present when touching occurred

This place is honestly truly bonkers!

You think his behaviour has been entirely appropriate. I don't. It's simply not normal for a teacher to encourage others to snitch on a classmate who has done nothing wrong. And the code word, WTF?

It was my daughter who felt uncomfortable at him entering the room. How do you think the discussion even arose? I was hardly going to ask her who had woken them up in the mornings!

End of discussion as far as I am concerned.

It wouldn’t cross my mind to think about it. Surely he’s been checked to be around children?
Exactly, all teachers have to be checked.
I know that means will only flag up those that have done anything in the past, but do you have any reason to be wary?

As an 11 YO on a residential school trip, I was subjected to inappropriate behaviour by a teaching assistant in the dorms. It was traumatic at the time and I still feel weird about it (though it wasn’t full on assault), nearly four decades later. So you are not wrong to be weirded out by it.

Make teachers did this on schools trips when I was a teen. It was never inappropriate. Just a teacher reminding us to get up/telling us off for still being awake. Usually it was a matter of seconds they were in the room and a fairly brisk “ladies, it’s well past the time you should be asleep!” sort of thing.

But I wouldn’t do this if I were a male teacher for fear of being misconstrued these days.

I've just asked DH who is a teacher and he said no way would he walk into any dorm to wake kids. He said best practise would be to just knock on the door and maybe shout a good morning. At 13 the kids should be able to wake themselves (if they were allowed their phones!).

So your dd misbehaved, got pulled up on it and now wants to make sure you back her up with her hatred of the teacher who dared to question her behaviour.?

You seem to be way over thinking this

I wouldn't be happy about him entering the room. Knock and call out, fine. Walking in on them while they were half asleep, not ok.

I'm with you OP. I'm not saying all female teacher are fine and dandy -my SIL is a teacher & a perv and I'm counting the days till she ends up in jail- but I don't think this male teacher should have gone in. I'm shocked the other teachers didn't say I'll wake them up not you.
As a teenager I often ended up asleep on top of the duvet or with a leg sticking out so I don't think it's right for any male adults, whether a teacher or a security guard (e.g. due to noise) to have gone into a room full a potentially naked young girls. What if they were already up and getting changed so half-naked and he'd just walked in?!
When they decided who wakes up whom, sb should have said sth, particularly as, I too, don't think it's normal for a teacher to have a shared code word with young ladies to rat on another classmate.

⬆️⬆️⬆️ Exactly this.

I think it’s odd tbh. On previous residential trips I didn’t go into the room to wake teenagers, even though I’ve only ever been responsible for same-sex groups. Knock on door, if it isn’t opened soon(ish) open the door a few centimetres myself and shout loudly until someone responds.

I don’t think it is unreasonable for teens in pyjamas to want privacy from teachers, especially opposite-sex ones. Not because teachers are dodgy (though some probably are) but because privacy and dignity are important. I wouldn’t want a male colleague to see me in my pyjamas and I think that should be extended to children wherever feasible.

My daughter misbehaved? By not having her phone.
As I said, bonkers!

come on OP, we’re all dying to know the question you’ve been clearly ignoring… how did they wake they up? you seem desperate to be furious tbh… you’re one of those parents are you not…

@mycatisannoying you’re right, it’s odd, he seems odd, I would advise dd to steer clear of him and avoid interactions