Fed up of Judgy comments to DS

[Fattyandconfused]

DS is 12 weeks.

DP has always been obsessed with clothes. Looking smart, designer gear… the lot.

so when I got pregnant I knew we’d have a very well dressed little boy. He has a lot of high end clothes

but for some reason my friends ALWAYS have something to say about it.

always the “you have more money than sense” or “he’s a baby you are ridiculous” or “oh god” followed by eye rolls or bringing other people over “LOOK WHAT DS NAME IS WEARING NOW”

Most of the stuff is from outlets, so end up being a similar price to next baby clothes. But I cant be arsed to tell people that. People also don’t realise that DS wears clothes from charity shops, hand me downs etc. I feel like if I started justifying it by saying “oh well it only cost xxx and his trousers are charity shop” it makes me seem like I’m embarrassed. Im really not.

who wouldn’t want their DC to have the best of everything?

we aren’t in debt and it’s something DP loves to spend money on. People waste money on drink/drugs…

i dont really care what they think, but just get bored of these stupid comments. WHO CARES?
id love to know some responses that basically shuts it all down without me sounding like I’m getting aggravated by it.

@Wouldloveanother and he gets alllllll that as well. Just because my son is dressed well doesn’t mean I don’t hug or feed him!

Isn't the whole point of branded clothing to make people notice it?

Yes but what are they? What are the best hobbies? I need to know

I don’t understand what benefit people think they are conferring to their child by dressing them in designer clothing?

🤣

Only time I ever judged someone for what their baby wore, was when my child was having a hospital stay and one of the other patients was a baby, at the sitting and nearly crawling age, who was wearing over a grands worth of very heavy chunky gold necklace.

And I only judged in the sense that it's a hospital, for one, might go missing. And sick baby in hospital could probably do with not wearing it. Mother was in agreement but the father who wasn't there but popped in now and then insisted his son wore it and apparently he had more at home. I think he wasn't the sort of partner she deserved to be honest, it's super controlling.

Clothes wise - only time mine ever had big names was if they were presents or in a sale or from the chazza. Many of my mates have dressed their kids in expensive scandi stuff - or ott hippy or goth stuff (ok maybe I also did a little of the last two examples there). Most sold items on afterwards, so it wasn't as bad.

If your DP wants to dress him in this stuff, that's his and your call. I can understand why your friends comment but it's none of their business. I'd be feeling hurt or annoyed in your shoes because their comments would make me feel ridiculed.

I can see why you need help dealing with comments in a nice way.

They’re not judging DS, they’re judging you.

@LittlestBaoBun 100000% agree. Things need to be practical for babies. And that’s always my priority.
thanks for your nice comment.

What kind of clothes are you dressing him in? I wouldn’t comment on a baby dressed in a designer babygrow/ romper but I do have an acquaintance who was always posting photos of her newborn in designer tracksuits and trainers. Not comfy cotton tracksuits either but sporty shell suit type ones made of horrible synthetic fabric with big clunky zips. All designer brands and probably cost a ridiculous amount but also looked so uncomfortable for the baby - no newborn needs to be wearing trainers!

I think if you’re going to dress your baby in clothing that isn’t typically worn by babies you have to expect comments. Absolutely you are free to dress your son as you want but it’s natural people will comment if he’s dressed unusually for a baby. The best way to avoid the comments would probably be to dress your son in a standard babygrow around the friends and save the fancy outfits for when you’re not meeting anybody.

It never ceases to amaze me the number of OPs who start threads because they ‘have issues sticking up to others’, but can stick up for themselves vigorously on here. Night all!

@WingBingo what have I said that’s wrong? I genuinely have told people I want help with dealing with a situation. Not opinions on how I dress my child.
ive been called names???

@Wouldloveanother because it’s easy to stick up for yourself to strangers on the internet who mean nothing to you.
its harder to have these conversations with people who mean something to you… because you actually don’t want to damage a relationship.

The OP makes a (rare) valid point. There's no evidence on this thread that she has even the slightest clue as to how to deal with comments in a nice way. 😁

No sign of nice appearing until it goes on sale in an outlet store.

I want my child to have the best of everything. Best clothes. Best hobbies. Best life. No exceptions

Um. What are the 'best' hobbies? And the 'best' clothes? Surely you just want your Dc to be happy? And designer clothes won't make them happy. Maybe at 15. Not now.

To me, your values are odd. And a lot of designer clothes are just chavvy, IME, especially on babies! You should be thinking about practically, comfort, sustainability, etc.

I'd be careful. You might end up with an entitled shit when your dc is older... You sound pretty aggressive... 🤔

At 12 weeks though babies get messy. Do they keep their value when they get washed more often than adult clothes? And toddler stage onwards you'll have rips and tears. This is a genuine question. I actually won a designer baby outfit and gave it to a friend. Apparently she had a poonami in it immediately the baby not the friend!

I've bought designer but I take care of them. That's harder with a baby.

Er? Read the room.

You have invoked quite the reaction.

Ironically you sound judgmental yourself OP. Saying you want your child to have the best clothes, and the best of everything etc, implying that those of us who don't dress our babies in designer clothes are somehow giving them second best.

Personally I think fancy clothes on a baby is a massive waste of money. Babies just want to be comfortable. It's your money to throw away of course, but don't try to make it equate to superior parenting.
Also, unless you have unlimited funds, you may want to start keeping spare cash back for when your DS is older, because trust me, there'll be plenty to spend your money on then!

I was with you until I read your replies to people.
Wanting your child to have the best, of course, we all do.
Designer clothes on a baby doesn't mean he has the best of everything. Some designer clothes look shite, so it's completely subjective.
The best hobbies? What are those exactly? You seem to think having the best is whatever you can throw money at. I can promise you, your ds doesn't give a shit whether he's in prada or primark. Saving the money for his future would be ensuring he has the best start, but you do you 🤷🏻‍♀️

I think you need to go back and read some of your responses in this thread because you are coming off extremely rude and bitchy.

The response about giving child a bike with no wheels, come on now - you know that's not what was meant at all and are just being childish with the response. Giving a 12 week old child designer clothes is not giving them the best in life. It's dressing them up like a doll and that's probably the impression others are getting

And if you don't want others opinions, don't go onto a public forum. You may only want one question answered but you open yourself up to comment on the entire story

@bloodyunicorns u are sooo strange. Couldn’t give a shite if you think they are chavvy.

my child will never be an entitled “shit” as you so kindly put it. What’s aggressive??? nothing.

weird people like you give an opinion and don’t like to get a response. Then pull the “aggression” card.

I mean if this is him, they may have a point?

Is Gant the best?

Absolutely not 😬

No sign of nice appearing until it goes on sale in an outlet store.

😂😂