To ask how many of you are actually happily married

[Strugglingtocopewithmarriage]

Meaning you genuinely like your partner, would marry then again given the chance, enjoy spending time with them...

Me. He's my best friend. We disagree and bicker a bit but nothing terrible

I should add that this is my second marriage. My ex husband was a decent man and our marriage wasn’t bad, really, but we married way too young and in the end I realised it just wasn’t right for either of us.

100%. We take the rough with the smooth and I can’t imagine life with anyone but him. Still just as in love as the day I married him.

Me! Been together almost 12 years, only married last year because when we first went to book it around 7 years ago we found out I was pregnant, then covid, then I got pregnant again. So in the end we booked it with only 7/8 weeks to organise everything and it was perfect.

I’m not married but 3 DC together 8 years, I’m very unhappy and the only reason I stay is because of logistics.

No doubt I would marry mine again every day or the week. He drives me mad at times but I love him and we laugh so much together

I love him.. would I marry him again.. nope.

Married 15 years and still very much in love although arguably it’s a deeper type of love these days. ❤️

Not that I am doubting any of these, but I have been around a good few years and have lots of friends and family, and I genuinely can only think of about 3 marriages I would describe as happy (and that’s just observing from the outside).
I am not married but would I choose DP again now? No probably not. I love him a lot but we are fundamentally different and have little in common in terms of what we enjoy doing.

Yep. Together 32 years. He's irritating sometimes, so am I, but we have each other's backs and make a great team. Having young kids was the hardest phase but we weathered it and I am hopeful we will go the distance.

I am very happy and would marry him again tomorrow. We’ve been together 17 years.

Until recently I’d definitely say yes and to a large extent I still would. He is a wonderful father, does more than his fair share, is kind, ambitious, smart and thoughtful. He is a good man and in many ways I feel very lucky.

But we’ve hit a bit of a rocky patch- I think it’s the pressure of two very young kids (a year apart), stressful jobs and general life stress. We’re both constantly knackered and bicker a lot; we don’t get any time together and it feels just like surviving a lot of the time. I feel like we’ve become just Co-parents rather than husband and wife. I also cannot sleep in the same bed cos of his snoring / general tossing and turning, so that effects intimacy, and I have zero libido since having kids 😏.

im also suddenly more conscious of the inevitable signs of ageing - thinning hair, but of a paunch - which I realise is massively shallow especially as I’m no doubt showing similar signs of middle age! but I think the general difficult patch of our marriage is amplifying these things and making me notice them more. He is also naturally quite quiet, not one to talk for talking’s sake so I sometimes wish he was a bit more light hearted / fun.

Overall I don’t regret marrying him, we have two wonderful children and I’m hopeful we’ll come out the other side. But I do think it’s true that marriage takes work and I was probably a bit naive expecting that not much would change when we had kids / got older.

No, am leaving. Should have done it sooner.

100% but it's only been a week!

5 years together though but he's my best friend and we really do have fun together every day. We are a solid team.

Me. 35 years. He cooks every meal. Nuff said.

We are in our 60s and both already experienced a bad marriage. Been together over 18 years now, extremely happy. Just want to encourage people who’ve had a crappy first partner that it’s possible to be happy later in life

Me 💕 In fact, we’ve just had a lovely home date night making cocktails from an at home cocktail kit which we bought a couple of weeks ago. Just waiting for him to brush his teeth so we can go to bed!

Recent UK figures are pushing 40% USA 50%, western figures overall are similar. Even Russia has a higher percentage I believe.

Sucks 🤷‍♀️ but it's true.

Not me and not many of my friends
but lovely to see how many are!

Yes and no.
I absolutely adore him. Always have. But then he had an affair and left me for her. We worked through it, have spent ages with a relationship therapist, and for the most part, we are good.
but Still, even after 14 months I’m still thinking that I can’t move on from the fact that he broke my trust in the most horrific way.
I do t want to waste another 10 years to
look back and think this was the time I should have left.

Me. We roar laughing every day. He's clever and a great dad.

Obviously also a massive pain in my arse on a daily basis but that's what happens when you live together for so long.

So 40% here, not 50%?

Why not just post that?

Yes, very happily married to a splendid man. When we first got together I wasn't in love with him and I suspect a lot of mutual friends were quietly thinking, "What does a gorgeous man like him see in HER?" Almost 20 years later, he's proved himself again and again, he's been solid when I've had doubts and wobbles, and I'd marry him again every day if I could.

I can see the point of the OP's question, because my first marriage became dysfunctional quite quickly and I assumed that this was normal after having children until I started to notice that other couples of a similar age and with young children were still affectionate and supportive and didn't bicker.

Nope. If youd have asked me 2 years ago (infact I recall posting on a similar thread) I would have said I adored him, he is my favourite person etc etc. Now 2 years on from his affair I've come to realise that was just a result of 20 years of narcissistic emotional abuse. I'm at the stage of wishing I'd never met him. If I could tell my younger self to run a mile I would. I thought i had it all, a love to rival the best there ever was.... it was only in my head tho

Wow @bumblenbean I could have written this word for word. Except my kids are 4 and 7. I thought it would be better by now but it’s not.
Mine’s more grumpy than quiet. Which can be hard work.