I will not let you hide in the cloak and dagger Mumsnet Mafia

[TheResistance]

you won’t get away with this

I do keep a beaker beside my bed to clean horses' heads.

Is this my chance to be a part of Bugsy Malone?

You could have been anything 🤣

Absolutely. It’s been decided we’re weaker divided, let friendship double up our powers.

I don’t have an actual dagger, will a miniature sword style letter opener do?

I do keep a beaker beside my bed to clean horses' heads

Is it a gigantic beaker or a normal size one for very small horses?

Best thread so far this year

And you can always take the cape off and wear it as a skirt? I have to think these things up.

Not MN mafia no.

But I am the danger.

I am the one who knocks.

grr.

If this is going to go all Bugsy Malone, i want a splurge gun before Dandy Dan shows up

Much appreciated for the bagel

Oh yes! It could be a bit Buck's Fizz, Making Your Mind Up style? I often do that at bedtime, just for a laugh. I think that might be good, yes! Will have to empty the pockets first, though.

Don't tell anyone but I'm undercover in the Feds so I can warn of any raids coming our way. They think I joined because MN kidnapped my Fruit Shoot. Officer Balonz if you need an inside ear.

NO ONE EXPECTS THE MUMSNET MAFIA!!!

Their chief weapon is fear and surprise.
Fear and surprise and the banhammer

(Fly on the wall recording of MNHQ Mod Squad springing into action follows)
m.youtube.com/watch?v=Cj8n4MfhjUc

I'm shocked that OP has rumbled us!

I've often thought MN could also use our own version of the A-Team - travelling around the country in a van, helping women to LTB, telling CFs to FOTTFSOF, and dispensing justice, wisdom and lemon drizzle cake.

@Sortilege

Southwold?
Good idea, we can let the crabs take care of the body

I've often thought MN could also use our own version of the A-Team - travelling around the country in a van, helping women to LTB, telling CFs to FOTTFSOF, and dispensing justice, wisdom and lemon drizzle cake.

That would be bloody brilliant. Like a supercharged emergency service. It would obliterate any need for 999, 111, doctors, health visitors, midwives, lawyers, psychiatrists, most tradespeople, interior designers, personal stylists, marriage guidance advisers, CAB, city councils, most government departments - in fact just about the only people that would be needed would be refuse collectors and couriers. I think we’d have everything else covered.

My neighbour was in the actual resistance. And he's still got his gun but they won't let him use it because he's in his 90s

So there

Do we get a mafia uniform? Can I request black? Boden obviously and sling back sandals ?

Most impressive, we always need double or triple agents for the cause.

I'll check with inventory clerk.

Please can we have elasticated waistbands?

I'll organise a training package lead by, Sergeant Major Jonas Blane.

Tell us who grassed or you'll be sleeping with the fishes.

Do we get a mafia uniform? Can I request black? Boden obviously and sling back sandals ?

Im fine with black and with Boden but can whatever is decided on be available in their Petite range because I’m really short . Also can I request trainers on the basis we need to be able to make a quick getaways/hasty retreats, and slingback sandals could be a major safety hazard when negotiating unlit, cobbled alleyways and other difficult terrain.

I've got a cloak but it's purple, not great for hiding in. My dagger (polymer clay knife) is a rainbow dragon one. I'm in though, my special skills are crafting 😆

Dashes off to raid Cludo game a swipes the dagger off colonel Mustard while he's not looking.
Presents it to @HebeMumsnet as a bribe token of respect .

Looks around to see if my partner in crime @sweetpea1535 has my back while I do mafia type stuff