To think many vegetarians and vegans are self entitled?

[Anabanananaaaaaa]

I know this is purely anecdotal evidence but of all the people I know or have met who are vegetarian or vegan (V/V for short) only about 1% were not judgement about other people's food choices.

Don't get me wrong I think business and friends/family should make some allowances for other's life style choices but the way many V/V treat others is just horrendous.

Point in case went to a local volunteer run food bank the other day and the lady in front of me had a melt down because there was meat in her food parcel. The organiser politely said why not give it to friends or family members instead but she the woman was having none of it and kept going off on one about how inconsiderate the organiser was.

I just couldn't believe the level of ingratitude this woman displayed considering these volunteers play such a vital role in the community.

Is my bias showing by feeling this way?

There are people I've known for years that don't know I'm vegetarian. I never mention it when going out for meals for example. I've been to a local steak place a couple of times with friends and there is always a vegetarian option.

I have found often if it does come up, I get an unsolicited spiel about why someone is not vegetarian. I really don't care, but I get it anyway.

Wow 😯

How utterly disrespectful.

The local food bank where I live ask people if they have any likes/dislikes so it can be recorded for example if they are meat free.

Food given to them is then done on basis of that info, so would swap the meat tin out with something more suitable to their needs.

YABVU

I’ve never eaten meat or fish and I am just under 5’8” and muscular.

This is a tired old scientifically incorrect trope that you ‘need meat to grow big and strong’. Get into this century!

(Op - I haven't read all the responses here because, with these threads on vegetarianism, I'm afraid someone is going to mention something horrible which will haunt me for ever!).

I've been a vegetarian for nearly 40 years. I don't 'preach' to others - it's totally counter-productive. But I am honest if people ask me about it. For example, a lovely but slightly dim meat-eating friend said "I couldn't like anyone who works in an abattoir!'. Well, if she buys and eats meat, that's hardly fair!

I don't even come out and say 'I'm a vegetarian' unless it's necessary (eg, eating at someone's home) and then I don't make a big issue of it. It takes over the conversation and people ask you that awful question: why are you a vegetarian? I really don't want to start detailing the barbarities of meat production at a social event.

Judgement? Well, I don't know how people can bear to boil a lobster or crayfish alive (yes, I know they can be stunned, but even so) and the same goes for shrimps and prawns. But I keep it to myself on the whole. I'm not evangelical - it's not in my character, but it also alienates people.

What I'm always thinking, though, is this: could you kill that creature you're eating yourself? If not, do you have the right to eat it? I'm nowhere near so repulsed by game which has been shot than I am by farmed meat. Also: do you realise that every animal is an individual character, and probably far more intelligent than you imagine, and able to suffer much more pain and stress than you might imagine.

But what I really wish is that people would just stop eating meat so often. It doesn't have to be in every meal - cut down and pay more for it, and subsidise kinder farming methods. Please!

End of sermon!

What does "self-entitled" mean? 🙄

By the way the organisers this isn't the only instance users of the food bank are encouraged to share food that they don't particularly like from the parcels with others that they know this is about helping others and reducing food waste

the woman is in dire enough straits to use a food bank. She is already worried about food. And she should just... forego some of it? How a bit of self reflection instead of being a judgy pants

You seem nice

This ^

Not really, dogs and cats are pet animals in British culture, not livestock. Most vegetarians do not keep cows, pigs or sheep as pets.

Agreed.

As an aide, I have seen posts by food bank volunteers that they have hundreds of tins of chickpeas, butter beans, kidney beans etc that they can't give to their users. Lots of people donate cheap vegan tinned food, but not a lot of food bank users apparently want them as they probably don't know what to do with them.

OP Yabu for your sweeping generalisation based on one anecdote.

Vegans and vegetarians just don't want to eat meat, nothing wrong with that. In fact, meat consumption is the biggest negative environmental impact that most individuals have.

I used to have a very racist co-worker. In the end I stopped trying to change her mind (sorry) and just tried to examine and understand her thinking.

Basically the only time she noticed someone was (group x) was when they annoyed her, and noticing that they were there was enough to annoy her.

A similar process seems to be going on here, they'll be plenty you don't notice and on occasion just saying that they don't eat x will probably be enough for you to feel that they're being obnoxiously judgey that you do.

I find the vegetarian and vegan bashing tedious and lazy. When anyone comes out with the tiresome line, How do you know someone is vegan? Don't worry, they'll tell you!" I reply with, "What about the vegans that didn't tell you?" and they invariably scoff, "I haven't met any!" and I say, "How do you know you haven't, if they haven't told you?... "

It's a divisive subject. Even in vegetarian / vegan groups, despite the majority being decent folk, you often see one-upmanship in the ranks, vegans hating veggies as their efforts are deemed half-hearted. Veggies hating vegans, because they don't Ike the dairy cruelty posts being shared by vegans in the group, as it "upsets them".

I posted in one such group recently. A light-hearted post that said, "One of the best things about going abroad? Discovering the local gastronomic delights!" accompanied by a plate of just french fries in front of me as that was all I could safely eat. Most people laughed with me, or sympathised and shared what they've had to eat on holiday.

But then one idiot posted, "What's that on the other plate? I hope it's not meat, as I would find this triggering that meat is being posted in this group. Oh, these so-called 'vegans' that date or marry a 'death breath' are somehow immune to the horrors."

Oh do fucking give over! My partner's plate was in the distance of the photo, you can't make out what anything is on that plate. So how can you be offended/ triggered by something not even visible?

So, my point is.. You get omnivore bellends, vegetarian bellends and vegan bellends. Fact of the matter is, most people are decent and accepting of other people's choices.

You're quite right. I was vegetarian for 27 years, now vegan for four years. I don't preach, and I don't disclose I'm vegan unless prompted. Last week a colleague in my new job bought the team a chocolate bar each on a whim, I politely declined, she said don't be daft one chocolate won't harm, I added that I don't eat chocolate, but thank you. She said everyone eats chocolate, I said I only eat dairy free. She pressed of I had an allergy, so then I said I was vegan. Point is it's not even a default answer.

I've also had instances in large groups going out for a meal, people in the group I've not met before notice my order

Ooops. Hit post by mistake. Anyway, they notice my order contains no meat or diary and literally start mouthing off, "I hope you're not vegan? Ugh, what's wrong with you? How can you not eat meat?" I was just ordering my grub minding my own fucking business.

I'm more than happy to have an adult debate, or explain why I'm vegan when someone asks with interest. Being vegan doesn't define me though.

I'm healthy, not vitamin deficiencies, I eat a wide range of foods, even decent (albeit expensive) vegan chocolate.

Like I say, I don't preach. But my friends enjoy my vegan cooking and are often blown away by some meat subs and the flavours in vegan food and start exploring vegan dishes for themselces to eat occasionally b

I think both the woman and the food bank are at fault. The woman shouldn't have shouted and the food bank shouldn't have suggested giving the meat away. Surely the meat should just have been handed back and reallocated to someone else who needed it rather than given away to a random person, possibly not in need at all.

What so someone who is forced into going to a food bank is not allowed to have any dietary preferences.
To be honest I wouldn't be happy either, I'm a vegetarian and if I was hungry enough to be going to a food bank I'd be disappointed if they were giving me food that I couldn't eat.
Do you not think poor people should have choices?

Personally think it is really entitled to want an animal to be reared often in poor conditions so you can have it killed and eaten. Same for what a dairy cow goes through. If you have watched all the evidence of cruelty and still think you deserve animal flesh and secretion well ok... but your the entitled one.

But I used to think like you until I did research and made a choice to go against a life time of eating a certain way. So I rarely judge (only commenting here because you have made a massive judgement) or preach. Just quietly get on with my life being happy with the choices I have made for myself. I don't consider myself entitled. If anything I feel a certain level of privilege to of reached this point for myself.

Totally baffled by this comment. I suggest you pretend to be vegan to someone and see the response you get. Or dare I suggest you watch Hogwood on Netflix. Then maybe you might understand some of the anger and frustration.

You have picked on v/v in this post when really your post is you saying people who use a food bank should take what they are given. Yet you wasn't brave enough to say that so put it on us v/v because in my experience people are all to happy to gang up on us. You also know this which is why you attempted to disguise you real opinion through us.

Yes am vegan. I donate monthly payment to a food bank. I expect meat and other animal products are purchased with that money. However I made a educated choice to become vegan. People shouldn't have any diet forced onto them. Everyone should have the opportunity to make their own choices .

The fact food banks exist is a disgrace. The fact you think people who have to use them should take what they are given is equally a disgrace.

And yet people wonder why "Be Kind" is primarily aimed at women?

Not talking about you, OP. This woman was wrong to kick and scream like that. Volunteers aren't there to be shouted at or abused. Can't believe how many people on here are condoning this lady's actions.

Actually, I can. This is Mumsnet.