Child outside psychiatric hospital

[UndertheCedartree]

I was visiting my DBF at the psychiatric hospital he is in at the moment today. We sat out the front. There was a DC there the whole 2.5 hours I was there with his parents who were visiting another patient.

I thought it was a bit strange. The garden of the male acute ward borders this area and you sporadically hear a lot of swearing at people and shouting. The patients out the front can sometimes shout inappropriate things, there can be fights or aggressiveness as obviously some are very unwell. I personally don't think it's an appropriate environment for a child.

The thing is it's not like there is no where else to go. There is a family room (but would need to be booked) and a short walk away there is a park and a square with benches and cafes/shops. The area outside the hospital has a road for cars to access the reception and the car park too and the DC kept scootering into the road. I expect he was really bored.

What do you think? I can't think of any reason they stayed there.

And the relative might have anxiety and feel unable to go that far away from the hospital.

I wouldn't let my children come into a hospital building to visit me so I'd be fucked off if I was told it's the family room or nothing.

Yet earlier you said and you have referred to them as parents ever since. Well until now when you was talking on the phone querying the relationship of these people.

I assume it was a family member but not a parent. But I just don't know why they didn't use the family room which is safe, quiet and has toys or the park so he could scoot to his heart's content. Personally, I wouldn't be worrying about people swearing but I'm talking about aggressive swearing at other people. Inappropriate comments being shouted out and physically aggressive behaviour. That kind of thing can be distressing to others let alone a 3 yo.

Well when the patients jump over the fence to escape obviously they've not been buzzed out! I said that when a patient is on leave then of course the staff don't know where they are, unless of course their leave is supervised. However, due to lack of staff supervision is rare. Lots of people get less supervision than they 'should'. Families have to walk to the ward to get the patient before going to the family room. They could also be using the toilet or vending machine. However the DC didn't go as far as the reception desk he was just hiding behind this sculpture.

And yes, I know re: blanket rules and individual risk assessments. That was what I was saying it's a fine balance.

I'm sorry I really don't know what you think I should be reporting.

Well, if you had no leave it would be the family room or nothing. Why wouldn't you let them come in a hospital?

It's a good point about anxiety.

We did see the patient at the shop but he might not have known about the square and the park is really near but a bit hidden if you don't know it is there.

I can’t understand why so many PPs seem to be deliberately misunderstanding the OP. The child was not visiting a parent, they were with both parents visiting another inpatient. At no point has OP said that the visit shouldn’t have taken place or that the child shouldn’t be at the visit, just that the other inpatients were verbally aggressive and potentially volatile and she and her BF had to stop the child going on to the road a couple of times. Her concern was that there was a more suitable environment for the child e.g. the family room or the park. I don’t think she sounded judgmental at all just surprised and concerned that the child was in that environment and could get hurt or witness something quite unpleasant. As she has said, she has been in the position of her children visiting in such a hospital. OP has also said she is autistic and so she probably wanted a sounding board as she may sometimes not read a situation right. Asking what others thought makes sense in that context. I assume others are responding so defensively because of their own history.

OP, I think you’ve done the right thing and, as you thought, the child should not have been there and the family can be advised of their options for future visits. Well done.

Why does this all bother you so much?

I said the patient wasn't the parent. Later I said the visitors were the parents. I then found out the patient was the uncle.

What's wrong with that??

Oh, thank you, that is very kind.

And yes, that is a good summary. I sometimes can miss something really obvious so I wanted to check.

Wow I really can’t believe that some of you are so callous to tell the OP to mind her own business! A psychiatric hospital is no place for a young child to be and this is a real safeguarding issue.

@ihatethefuckingmuffin there was a nice pond and a park opposite The Cassel.

@Redbone so you don’t think a child should be allowed to visit a close family member? A parent?

I haven't read the whole thread buty thank you OP for thinking about this child more than the 'mind your own business' approach that other people seem to take. Yes this is not a suitable place for a 3 year old, for 2 1/2 hours. I have worked in mental health units and it's not unlikely that the child would witness unusual behaviour without having any context to understand what's happening. It sounds like the parents were being lax at least. Does DBF know the other patient? Depending on what the other patient is like, maybe he could let them know about the family facilities or ask the staff to.

I think people in these kind of units are uniquely sensitive to any kind of child neglect or abuse for obvious reasons so it's about protecting the other patients from distress too.

I went to visit my auntie with my mum and it was ok and calm, she came into a big dining area which only had about 3 other families in. I was about 9/10/11.

I'd forgot about my auntie being admitted until I just saw this and immediately thought of being taken by parents when I was about 10/11 to visit my teenage cousin who used to babysit me in a different hospital. I shit myself. We were inside and it felt like 'mad' people were everywhere and my cousin sat there zoned out and dribbling. I was so scared I remember hurting myself discreetly to cope, how bizarre. (Scratching/ squeezing myself under table).

A child visiting an acute mental health inpatient ward is categorically not a safeguarding issue.

I assume others are responding so defensively because of their own history

Having a dig at people's mental health. Charming.

Fgs none of this is about a child visiting a psychiatric ward, it’s about them being left alone outside and by the road for a long period of time. In any case a psychiatric ward is not a place for children. Nor is hospital in general terms. Jeez, they’re for sick people, they’re not bloody museums.

Oh so that means that children cannot visit their parent who might be in hospital.
Or even their own siblings.

so glad things have moved on from the days that those with mental health issues were locked up and forgotten about.

The child was not abandoned and if people bothered to read through the op has made several inconsistencies including if the child was near a main road or car park.

But anyway the op has sorted it, called the ward and the boyfriend to establish who these people are.

That is a wild extrapolation and you know it. 🙄

What’s wrong with you? Or did you just fancy arguing 🤔

I have made no inconsistencies...you just keep making out I have and then I clear it up!

I didn't say the DC was near a main road. I said a road. The road goes past the main entrance. The area the toddler was was opposite this road and then to the side was car park. I mentioned the car park when explaining how small the area he had to play on was.

She spent ages yesterday trying to argue with me about things I never actually said!

I've asked the staff to.

The DC wasn't alone. They were with their parents. But I thought it wasn't the best place for a visit.

I don't understand people saying they visited a psychiatric ward as a child and they're fine - OP has clearly said that it's not the visiting she has an issue with, it's how the visit was conducted and whether there was a better/safer place.

It also smacks to me of people saying 'I was smacked as a child and I'm fine' or 'I've smoked 60 a day my whole life and i'm fine' - just because you're fine doesn't mean everyone else will be. A sensitive child or a child with ASD for example could be very overwhelmed/upset if there is a lot of shouting and fights breaking out and it could definitely affect them - any child who is not used to that sort of environment could be shaken by it I'm sure. It is also dangerous of course for a child to be scooting into the road - in fact there was a thread the other day about a well supervised child playing in a very quiet private car park and everyone went mad saying how dangerous it was and that a grumpy driver was right to have a go at the mother about it!

You sound lovely OP, well done for being concerned about the child and wanting the best for them.

I'm sorry to hear of that experience. I suppose it does highlight that environment can play a part in how the DC deals with the visit.

Yes, I agree about people saying this happened to me as a DC and I was fine, except in those stories it sounds like they think mentally unwell people just mumble a few delusions and that's it. But yes, it is usually the ones who weren't fine that you don't hear from so much.