Child outside psychiatric hospital

[UndertheCedartree]

I was visiting my DBF at the psychiatric hospital he is in at the moment today. We sat out the front. There was a DC there the whole 2.5 hours I was there with his parents who were visiting another patient.

I thought it was a bit strange. The garden of the male acute ward borders this area and you sporadically hear a lot of swearing at people and shouting. The patients out the front can sometimes shout inappropriate things, there can be fights or aggressiveness as obviously some are very unwell. I personally don't think it's an appropriate environment for a child.

The thing is it's not like there is no where else to go. There is a family room (but would need to be booked) and a short walk away there is a park and a square with benches and cafes/shops. The area outside the hospital has a road for cars to access the reception and the car park too and the DC kept scootering into the road. I expect he was really bored.

What do you think? I can't think of any reason they stayed there.

I meant judging my dad’s decision to take me to visit my mum @Schmz and people saying it’s no place for a child. No hospital is an ideal environment for a child to see their parent but in my experience it’s better than not seeing the parent at all. She was unwell and I visited her.

I didn’t have social work involvement and I remember my parents trying to make things as stable as possible for me despite the circumstances.
Of course it depends on the ward/ hospital as I am sure some are less appropriate for children than others.

Because I was worried for the safety of the DC.

i meant people on mumsnet can’t question it, given that we were not there, have no idea of the situation and can’t do anything. OP is the only person who could have done something.
Btw you don’t need to explain child safeguarding to me, I am well trained in it, thanks though.

I wouldn't say "mind your own business" - children's wellbeing is everybody's business, and I can see why you were concerned. I would say, however, that this particular situation is probably more nuanced than you think. It may be that this was the only way this patient could receive a much needed family visit. It may be that that child needed contact with that patient more than they needed to be protected from bad language/challenging behaviour. It may be that that child, through their relative's illness, has already been exposed to far worse and has had to grow up quickly - this would change the dynamic in terms of the balance between shielding them and including them. We just don't know.

It's possible but it isn't booked that often. That's a good point about the person not wanting to leave the grounds. There could be a lot going on, I agree, but I just felt for the DC. But you are quite right the parents may have been worried too but didn't know what to do. I do wonder why they stayed so long or why parent didn't take the other to the park. I've been there being the patient and also visiting the patient. I do think the DC should be prioritised.

At one hospital I was at DC were only allowed on hospital grounds to go to the family room. It makes sense.

The family room was probably booked and the parent / guardian didn’t want the child off site in the park. Sometimes these things are unavoidable if you have no childcare. Depending on the age of the DC I don’t think it’s appropriate or safe to have them swan off to the park “a short walk away” anything could happen there too. Perhaps the guardian could see the child from where they were in the building. If you felt so uncomfortable you could have mentioned it to staff, but you didn’t.

Better for the child to be introduced to all kinds of people and feel comfortable visiting friends or relations with any kind of illness. Yes over two hours is a long time but nothing wrong with the principle, most people with MH issues aren't dangerous to anyone but themselves

Maybe. To be fair the patient they were visiting wasn't kicking off it was other people. And it wasn't even that bad today. But people who are mentally unwell can be volatile. I just think that could frighten a DC and even worse if the scooted into the middle of something!

I do think the DC should be prioritised.
You have absolutely no idea why their parents was there and why they had to be there, and it’s really fucking judgemental to make this kind of statement. God help you if you’re ever in a situation caught between a rock and a hard place.

I was hospitalised in a psychiatric hospital due to severe anorexia. My weekly visit from my best friend and her little girl was all I looked forward too, that little bit of normality, and during the times I didnt want to talk, playing a game with her little girl was magical. I wasn't allowed to leave the hospital to go to the park, but she was never in any danger, no dangerous patient is allowed leave to the hospital grounds (which is what I had), and nor was she traumatised. She was visiting her "auntie" who was poorly in hospital. She didnt need to know the type of poorly, if there was any poor language or shouting it was nothing different to what she might hear walking through the local town. Our psychiatric hospital has wonderful gardens, and in all honesty, it was so peaceful. Birds, landscaped gardens, a little play area for children. Not everyone in a psych hospital is "crazy" or "dangerous", some have just given up and need a little help to find that hope and spark again (which thankfully for me, my friend's little girl helped with.)

This was the same at one hospital I was at. But I'm talking about on the grounds not outside the grounds. At that hospital a DC couldn't hang around the grounds with all the patients.

Yes, I absolutely wasn't judging the visiting. I've been there. That's why hospitals have family rooms to make the visit safe and comfortable for DC.

Why shouldn't family visit people in hospital?

Many an hour I spent sitting outside of a psychiatric hospital as a child. My dad used to pick my mum up who worked as a mental health nurse and she often did not get out on time. Seen all sorts, didn't phase me. By the time I got to adolescence I visited family members as inpatients.

I now work in mental health, if anything it peaked my interest. I once had a grown woman approach me as a child convinced she was pregnant with an alien. I was fascinated ever since and really enjoy working in this field.

Also by not allowing any sort of exposure you will be indirectly adding to stigma. Okay inside wouldn't be the best idea for kids but waiting outside can be an opportunity to discuss all sorts of issues. Like I said it didn't scar me it benefitted me.

i agree with this in principle but
an acute psychiatric inpatient unit is something quite different !!!
with impatient cutbacks - only very unwell people are in these environments-
psychotic for example
as OP is trying to convey - behaviour is volatile, can be aggressive, fights can break out rapidly etc
would people really think this is a suitable environment for a 3 year old ????

Yes and now someone has pointed it out it could just be that they didn't know. I think I'll mention it so staff can make sure the family know all their options.

Yes, I agree with this. Noone is going to stop the DC visiting but could make it more comfortable/safer for the DC.

You. didn’t say it in your OP but later. If a child of 3 was left unattended and not in view of an adult I would have intervened regardless whether it was on the grounds of a mental health hospital or not

The road safety issue seems more serious to me. The parents should be making sure he isn't putting himself and others in danger by running in front of cars.

I used to visit a psychiatric hospital as a child, we knew someone who was a nurse and sometimes I'd go on a Saturday afternoon when we'd turn the canteen into a dance hall for the Saturday night social. We'd arrange tables round the edge of the room, put some decorations up. Didn't do me any harm in fact I think it was good for me as I wasn't scared of people with mental health problems.

I visited my grandparent when I was around 6/7 year old when she was very unwell with anxiety and bipolar disorder. This was about 25 years ago!
I remember visiting her and she had lots of scabs as she had climbed through a thorn bush. Did it scar me for life? Nope. She was unwell and I did see her get better. I also saw her a lot when she was physically unwell in hospital.
My mother was an only child and had no help with childcare, my dad worked unpredictable shifts so we had to go.
I'm a qualified healthcare professional now.

i'd would of said something to staff . My friends mum was ward manger on a psychiatric ward . We used to go sometimes after school to meet her from work . Some of the kick off's used to frighten me as an 14 year old lad

Actually they weren't safe - they were shooting out into a road with a parked ambulance. They were close enough to other people to get in between something. Also as I explained it wasn't overhearing bad language I was worried about. It was seeing and hearing aggressiveness. I really hope if my DC was in that position that a kind person didn't keep their nose out and helped the child be more comfortable and safer.

Those saying mind your own business. I take it you wouldn't mind your DC being in that kind of frightening and unsafe environment?

Noone would judge you visiting. It's about where the visit takes place. Some hospitals all DC are checked by a SW not just those who have Children's services involvement.