To tell my friend that I’m not keen on her baby name?

[AllHailKingLouis]

Friend told me today she has chosen the name Susan for her baby. I don’t like it personally but automatically said “oh, that’s nice”.

she’s just WhatsApp me asking if I really liked the name as she got the feeling that I didn’t (oops, I’m a shit liar).

would I be unreasonable to admit that I don’t? Or should I carry on lying about it? (Which I can do easier via WhatsApp!)

If she was asking your opinion because she was in two minds and genuinely wanted your input, then you could be truthful. But she's not asking you because she truly wants your opinion, she's asking because she got the feeling you didn't like it when she told you and she wants reassurance. So IMO, the best thing to say is that you were just surprised because it's not one you hear often, but you think it's a really nice name that's due a revival. Or something along those lines.

I actually rather like Susan. Cool nickname potential and sounds fresh.

Perfect response!

It’s not a perfect response though! It’s an unnecessary put-down and really patronising, with an extra self-satisfied twist.

“Absolute honesty is so very important to me that I couldn’t possibly keep my negative opinion of your baby’s name to myself”

I mean if you want to sound like the unlikeable secondary character in a tired sitcom, go for it but it’s less twattish to just say “ah, lovely”

Your story made me laugh.

My Aunt was supposed to be Susan (that’s what my Grandma wanted) however Gramps got to the birth certificate first and went with Suzanne. I was grateful however for him starting the ‘he who fills out the bitch certificate wins’ precedent. When I was born my dad wanted me to be Margaret Mary. Thankfully mum got there first and went in a different direction.

better to say something constructive like “I love Suzie, have you thought about Susannah”

TBH I think Susan is probably due a come back so she may be ahead of the curve.

Personally I would just say 'Being truthful, Im not a huge fan of the name. But it is not my daughter. I'd maybe think how she may feel about it when she's at school as it is quite an outdated name. Maybe Susanna could be a nice compromise?, obviously I don't want to offend you with the above, but the fact is, you've asked for my opinion and I value you too much to lie x '

For info,.My mother's name is Susan and she absolutely HATES it. Even the nickname Su isn't nice.

It’s not for OP to suggest a compromise name! It’s not her baby.

Do the right thing and lie through your fucking teeth. It’s only for a month: when the baby arrives and the name is attached to a person – and a snuggly cuddly person at that – you’ll forget all about your dislike of the name and just think, “Oh, lovely baby Susan!”

Totally loving the autocorrect to "bitch certificate", I am having that!

I'd "say something" if I thought a friend had overlooked something (ie. their surname is Taylor and they're thinking of calling their daughter "Genevieve" or "Jennifer") or if they were thinking of something really awful.

"Susan" is fine. It's not very fashionable right now, but it's not a silly name, and it shortens to lots of things like Susy, Suky, Sue etc.

Given the way names tend to trend, it will probably be very fashionable in about 20 years time and young Sue will feel like she is on-trend at last, and benefit from having a "youthful" feeling name for the rest of her life.

Agree with others, just say you were a bit surprised because it's not very common right now, but perhaps it'll grow on you when you meet baby Susan.

Aquamarine1029
"It's not a name that I would choose, but it's not my baby. If you love the name, use it."

Perfect response!

Agreed.
I really really don't like the MN suggestion of not telling the truth. "Don't tell her the truth". No, I disagree. Part of friendship is telling the truth.
I would probably say I wasn't keen.

I'm amazed you have the energy to care about the name of someone else's kid and I'm amazed they care what you think.

If she was being named Death Star Apocalypse I might bat an eye but Susan is a great name unless the DC is a boy.

Just say its not your cup of tea but that you are happy that she is happy. Or something dumb like that haha.

Susan is the worst name ever. Kid is destined to be a "karen" 🤣

did you miss the bit where she’s seeking out my opinion? I don’t care! She’s asking me anyway!

I went with this:

”it’s not that I don’t like it, it’s just not a name you hear much anymore ☺️ Will she have a middle name? X”

she didn’t reply 😬

She shouldn't have asked if she didn't want your honest opinion. Hope she isn't one of those people who ask and then sulk because they don't like the answer!
If it makes her pause and maybe reconsider, then you've done the kid a solid!

She'll have read that as
"Jeez, that's one fugly name. Do you have a back up at least?"

Brutal

Well you've made yourself clear at least!

Well I don’t know! I’m not very good with people! This is why I prefer dogs

⬆️ Agreed! It's not your baby so just be nice!

Jesus. Are you actually her friend?

My social skills are shit, what can I say?

Oh dear! I think you should just have lied. She was seeking your approval. Honesty, however dressed up, is not always the best policy.

Probably should have left out the last bit!

Well she shouldn't have asked if she didn't want to know imo.

Or is she hoping that everyone will gush & say "how fabulous & original"?

I asked about the middle name as I was hoping to follow up with “oh they sound lovely together” etc … obviously it didn’t go to plan