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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to go to Glastonbury?

514 replies

greentreesgreengrass · 21/06/2022 14:37

DP and I got Glasto tickets for 2020, now of course moved to finally be this week! hooray!

We have a 12 week old DS who we'll be leaving with my parents. We're away tomorrow to Tuesday as having a couple of days away to recover from the festival after!

People have seemed a little judgy about this. do you think it's fine? we will of course be going anyway but interested to know what people think.

OP posts:
Topgub · 22/06/2022 09:27

@BlackandBlueBird

My kids were securely attached to gps and aunts well before 1 year.

There's no evidence a loving gp caring for the child will cause harm.

So there's no reason to judge other than to make yourself feel superior. Although I'm sure the ops not giving a shit having a blast at Glastonbury

Topgub · 22/06/2022 09:29

@BlackandBlueBird

Oh and personally I find it really sad that you're oh is dispensable to his kids and was willing to leave his new born for work

Just so sad. How could he do that? I could never. Just love them too much

Topgub · 22/06/2022 09:30

@SleepingStandingUp

No.

I find the idea of never leaving kids ever slavish martyrdom.

The pp I responded was talking about not having left a 6 yo.

EvelynParker · 22/06/2022 09:31

I left my son at 10 months old for a week, he was fine and very happy.

At 12 weeks I don't know if I could have but babies at that age don't seem to care whose looking after them as long as they're being looked after.

BlackandBlueBird · 22/06/2022 09:32

I don’t feel superior at all. What a strange reaction. Why are you so defensive?!

Topgub · 22/06/2022 09:37

@BlackandBlueBird

I'm not defensive.

Honestly.

I just disagree with the judgement. And hypocrisy.

Most judgement comes from a place of feeling superior, of thinking our way is better.

In this case though the judgement is misplaced because there's no harm in not being attached to kids 24/7

If you wouldn't like it, thats fine. Most wouldn't

But its not harmful and has nothing to do with love. And has everything to do with sexism and feelings if superiority

timestheyarechanging · 22/06/2022 10:01

My friend did it but was only away 3 days/nights. She missed him terribly (about same age as yours) but she did enjoy herself. Breast feeding so lots of prep before and dealing with boobs whilst away.

I would shorten your stay away - pick baby up straight from Glastonbury and take it in turns to sleep it off / tending to baby.

Have fun / its decades since I went. Went every year 88-98 though up until I was pregnant with my first Smile

zingally · 22/06/2022 11:08

I don't think I could have physically taken myself from mine at that age. They still felt like part of my own flesh at that age.

Saying that, if you feel up for it, go! Although the extra 2 days seems weirdly self-indulgent.

Personally, you couldn't pay me enough to go to Glastonbury! Everything about it sounds hideous! Camping? Loud thumpy music? Drunk crowds? Yuck.

Nocutenamesleft · 22/06/2022 12:04

No way!

though both my kids were in nicu still at that age. I remember the nurses telling me I had to take a night off to go to my fathers wedding for a few hours whilst they look after my child. I remember the guilt for just a few hours!!!

I could not of done that. Nope

orwellwasright · 22/06/2022 14:51

Asked my nine year old this morning whether he feels he's missed out on anything.

To my surprise he said he's beyond gutted that when he was 16 weeks old I never took him to see Paul McCartney perform live.

I can't believe I've denied my kid such a crucial life experience. How do we move on from this?

wotsitsaremyfave · 22/06/2022 17:45

It's an entirely personal choice. Is this your first baby and is it the GP's first GC? Do they know what they are letting themselves in for? A 12 week old is hard work and i imagine they hae forgotten what hell the sleepless nights are.

SO i don't think you are BU to want that time away but to put that responsibility on your parents is arguably unfair.

Teaandtoastedbiscuits · 22/06/2022 17:49

Go and enjoy, you will probablycancelvthe couple of days after Glastonbury though but if you don't, enjoy the recovery

wotsitsaremyfave · 22/06/2022 17:50

and having been to Glasto a few years back, it's an endurance test similar to that of looking after a newborn. Are you sure you don't want to stay home and sleep? I can't believe people are saying to take the baby. Maybe we took too much crap but having newborn woudl have doubled the mount of bags/stuff we had to lug from car park to camping field. It took hours and it was bloody hard work

CountryMouse22 · 22/06/2022 17:52

You go if you want to! It's only a few days, babe probably won't even know you're gone. (Personally, you couldn't pay me enough to go!)

LibranNan · 22/06/2022 18:43

I would just like to say enjoy yourselves! Sounds like grandparents are happy to have him.I dont see the harm .It doesn't matter that it may not have been what I could/would do.Enjoy !☀️☀️

HarryBlaster · 22/06/2022 18:44

It’s ok for your baby to get some love and bonding time with grandparents. I am sure they are very doting and attentive and will give you the respite you need. You’re really fortunate to have such a settled baby and that really reflects in your parenting so far. Enjoy the time away.

wentworthinmate · 22/06/2022 18:47

My parents wouldn’t have entertained the idea of babysitting a small baby at that age for ONE night let alone four or five. Not coming back after Glasto is taking the p* frankly.

Newusername3kidss · 22/06/2022 18:48

Personally no, it’s too young. I’d be too worried about him to actually enjoy myself. Would also be stressed about getting back in case of emergency.

me109f · 22/06/2022 18:48

Of course it is fine. You will always treasure the experience, and you deserve it.

GrabbyGabby · 22/06/2022 18:55

Mine are now 4 and 7 and whilst i would give my right kidney for a weekend without them, i still wouldn't want to be without them longer than this. No way i could have waved either of them off at 12 weeks.

But you do you. I wouldn't judge you for leaving them, but i would question why you would choose to.

Candy999 · 22/06/2022 19:00

YNBU

I find people who judge on matters like this generally do because they usually don’t have such willing people around them to offer childcare and are very bitter about it. The fact they don’t get a break and a nice time away means anyone else is the devil for doing it. So to make up for that they try and make comments about how they never would, or they love their children too much to do such a thing. 🙄

CandyLeBonBon · 22/06/2022 19:10

orwellwasright · 22/06/2022 14:51

Asked my nine year old this morning whether he feels he's missed out on anything.

To my surprise he said he's beyond gutted that when he was 16 weeks old I never took him to see Paul McCartney perform live.

I can't believe I've denied my kid such a crucial life experience. How do we move on from this?

Get him into therapy IMMEDIATELY!

orwellwasright · 22/06/2022 19:13

me109f · 22/06/2022 18:48

Of course it is fine. You will always treasure the experience, and you deserve it.

It's your world, hun. Everyone else, including your 12 week old baby, is just a passenger.

What the fuck does 'deserve it' even mean? How does the OP 'deserve' a 6 day jolly to glasto whilst her kid gets palmed off?

orwellwasright · 22/06/2022 19:15

CandyLeBonBon · 22/06/2022 19:10

Get him into therapy IMMEDIATELY!

Show quote history

I think you're right. I've been playing the Frog Chorus non-stop since breakfast but it's just not cutting it.

FloydPepper · 22/06/2022 19:24

If this was a mate of mine telling me their plans, the bit I’d raise my eyebrows at would be the extra 2 days “recovery” time. For me, that goes beyond a well deserved and valued couple of days, into the “taking the piss” territory.

id also assume it meant lots of drugs being involved, which with a baby at home doesn’t feel right either.

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