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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Have just sent neighbour’s builder away

395 replies

Allthecoolusernamesaregone · 20/06/2022 14:35

Our neighbour said she was having work done and we agreed access and to have scaffolding in our garden. We knew it would be inconvenient, but the work was only due to take a few days.

We made sure paths etc were clear and the scaffolding was put up about 10 days before the work was due to start.

It makes access through our normal route very tight, and blocks the majority of light to the kitchen, but is about what we thought.

It’s worse at the moment due to a pre existing agreement to look after my friend’s rabbits, as their run takes up a lot of space, and I have to navigate a ‘squirrel style assault course’ to reach my washing line.

The building work didn’t start as planned, and we have now had the scaffolding up for one month. The Tesco delivery man can’t get his trolley through, so we meet in the garden ( yes, I know ‘first world’ problems!).

We didn’t know work would be starting today, but mid morning my dog
barked ( fortunately he was safely in the house). I saw that my back gate had been wedged open, and men were bringing things into the garden.

They knocked on the door to complain that there were some things stored close to one of the access areas. ( the access itself was clear). I have a postage stamp sized garden and with the scaffolding and the rabbit run I don’t really have anywhere else to move things. The one who was doing all the talking said something like ‘it’s on you if it gets ruined then’.

I asked him to make sure the gate was shut when they were not working in my garden due to my dog ( I will have to take him into the open plan front garden on a lead whilst they are working). He told me they weren’t going to be opening and shutting gates all the time.

I asked when they would be working and he said they would be here when they are here and it might be a day this week and then when they had time over a few weeks. He was almost aggressively vague.

I wasn’t happy, the scaffolding is already a pain, and over a period of a few weeks, with no prior notice, I can’t guarantee that no one will accidentally let the dog out not knowing they are there or have left the gate open.

The final straw came when he again banged on my door and demanded I move the rabbit run, which is about 18” away from the path, and not especially in the way. My husband is away and I couldn’t move it on my own even if I had space.

He said it was my garden and my responsibility to move stuff to give him access. He wanted to set up a cement mixer in that space, and plug it in in my garage. (The garage is normally kept locked.) He was very unpleasant.

I admit I lost my temper there. I told him I was pleased he realised it was my garden and as such I wanted him to remove himself and all of his stuff from it.

I have seen the mess sometimes left by mixing cement and if he had been reasonable I would probably have put up with it, but he was not, and he is not running it on my electricity.

He started ranting that he had a right to be there to get to next door’s job.

I told him that access had been granted with my permission and I was now withdrawing it, and he needed to leave.

He then said he was wasting his time dealing with a woman and wanted to speak to my husband.

At that stage I told him to Fuck off, and left saying I would be phoning the police.

I was on hold for 101 but was quite surprised to see him packing up his stuff and going!

My neighbour is at work and unaware of the confrontation. I have no idea how she will react.

OP posts:
ZenNudist · 20/06/2022 14:51

What a shame for neighbour but they should have done the work quickly without abusing you.

WaterBottle123 · 20/06/2022 14:51

Wow. Well done OP

Blowthemandown · 20/06/2022 14:54

Sounds awful, but do get in first with your neighbour (presume you get on ok) and get your unemotional account in so they know builder overstepped (understatement!)

Cyclebabble · 20/06/2022 14:54

Unbelievably entitled and I would not be letting him back in either. Your neighbours have also not covered themselves in glory in leaving the scaffolding up for a month.

pigsDOfly · 20/06/2022 14:54

They were horrid but I suspect your neighbour will be fuming.

Too bloody bad if they are.

Giving permission for scaffolding to be put up in your garden means exactly that. It does not involve having to tolerate being treated with rudeness and bullying by a 'horrid' prick of a builder. And it certainly doesn't involve having a cement mixer in your garden and paying for the electricity to run it.

AllThingsServeTheBeam · 20/06/2022 14:55

Good for you op. You were being more than accomadating anyway. Next door will have to just find a new tradesman!

easyday · 20/06/2022 14:56

Unbelievable. When I had my extension built we needed some access through the neighbour's garden. She was elderly and wary of strangers so we agreed that I would warn her the days men would be in her garden, leave no mess whatsoever, Bly access when absolutely necessary.
My builders were extremely polite and took care not to disturb or worry her.
My current builders are polite, on time, never swear, do not play music, and always ask permission to access stuff, clean up every day and make sure everyone is happy.
Your neighbours builder is why builders have such a bad rep. Be sure to tell your neighbours how awful he is.

MrszClaus · 20/06/2022 14:57

Well done for standing up for yourself OP!

So, definitely pop a note through the neighbours door / send a text telling them what's gone in. Also ask them to remove the access scaffolding, they'll have to work around it.

No builder should be using your electricity / mixing cement in your garden if it isn't your building work. Coupled with being rude about access and work timings I'd genuinely have done the same. Did you make the police report? I would if you didn't, then it's recorded.

I'd recommend keeping your phone handy to record incase they return.

Merryoldgoat · 20/06/2022 14:58

What a great post. If only more people would not allow the piss to be taken out of then.

You are absolutely NBU

MarmiteCoriander · 20/06/2022 14:58

Have you spoken to the neighbour in the past month that the scaffolding is up??? Are they aware of what a pains its been? Have they keep you updated in terms of timeslines? I assume not if they arrived unexpectedly. What work is the neighbour having done?

We are renovating and living in a van in the garden. Cement mixers churn through electric- so I agree in not letting them use yours! As an example, our smart meter might show 4kW/Hr with minor things on in the van. When the cement mixer goes it- it shoots up to 19kW/hr!

Did you get the name of the company? Unless the CF is the owner, I'd contact the company and write a formal complaint about his attitude and asking for your husband!!!

Our workmen and trades have been polite and fairly good, but even so- I've had cement on plants, fag ends/lunch wrappers and drinks bottles left in plant pots and buckets in the garden! Concrete slurry poured onto a pile in the garden- which in turn cemented the corner of our BBQ by 1 leg! Recycling bins cracked by workmen moving bricks around and much more! The mess is unbelievable so I'd say NO.

EmmaH2022 · 20/06/2022 14:59

What an arsehole

I hope your neighbour gives him what for. Frankly I consider her equally responsible.

ValerieDoonican · 20/06/2022 15:01

Remember to tell your neighbour what he said about coming back only as and when he felt like it, too. That was definitely not what you granted permission for - even before you get in to outrageous rudeness and threats to leave gate open etc.

Crankley · 20/06/2022 15:02

Having had a similar experience, I think the reason why they put up the scaffolding before they are ready to use it and leave it after work has been completed, is so they don't have to pay for storage. I can't think of any other reason. It's in some way easier or cheaper for them to take it down from one location and immediately use it for another.

It is totally unacceptable and you were right to tell him to fuck off, especially when he asked to speak to your husband. What a misogynistic neanderthal.

I would tell him to take scaffolding down immediately or you would get someone else to do it and charge him a daily fee of £100 for storing it in your garden until it's collected.

heavyistheheed · 20/06/2022 15:04

How is your relationship with your neighbour usually?
Ugh what a twat. I'd be fuming. There's no way you can back down now, hopefully your neighbour sees reason and doesn't lose too much money from this. Obviously it's not your problem or your fault but I hope it doesn't cause issues.

GordonBennetttt · 20/06/2022 15:04

Good on you, what a prick he is.

ValerieDoonican · 20/06/2022 15:04

Oh and very well done, we all need an inner allthecoolusernames

GoldenSongbird · 20/06/2022 15:05

You were quite right to put him out.
It sounds as though he didn't want to do the job and now he has the perfect excuse not to do it.
I wouldn't be telling the neighbour to take the scaffolding down. It's not the neighbour's fault. Hopefully their next builder is better.

cakewench · 20/06/2022 15:06

You are a champion. He sounds like a bellend and I hope your neighbour is amenable to hearing your side of things, because if I were her I wouldn't want to be employing someone like that.

WeeOrcadian · 20/06/2022 15:06

I want to hunt you down and pat you on the back

Fucking sexist prick. I'm so glad you stood up to him and told him to fuck off!!!

ifonly4 · 20/06/2022 15:07

Sounds like he's been messing your neighbour around with a delay and no guarantee when work will be finished. Give neighbour 10 mins when they return from work to sort themselves out and go around for a non confrontational chat. For your neighbour's sake, he needs to come back at a time that convenient to you (ideally when you have someone else in the house) and talk through calmly how this can be resolved. If not, as said above tell your neighbour you'll have to give them 7 days notice to get the scaffolding off your premises.

Eddielizzard · 20/06/2022 15:07

He's hilarious! He thinks he can use your electricity and trash your garden for someone else's house??? What planet is he on?

CulturePigeon · 20/06/2022 15:09

I admire you enormously, OP. Well done. Someone has to tell these entitled oafs that there are consequences to their boorish mysogyny. We had next door's builders spreading into our garden and they were personally OK - but managed to mess up the patio with paint and cement and drop a huge breeze block off next door's roof onto...thankfully only a garden bench (breaking it) but it could so easily have been a family member sitting there.

You've done absolutely the right thing, but there's a bigger issue here. Lots of my friends wonder why we've never had certain obvious things done to our house...and it's because I would rather gouge my eyes out with paperclips than employ builders - I've heard so many horrible stories. What is the problem? I know they are usually self-employed, and therefore a bit of a law unto themselves, and that they are often in a position of high demand, so can get away with this kind of thing...but when they are training - doing City and Guilds etc, isn't there a module explaining basic courtesy and consideration? I would have thought that it's vital to explain to young trainees that they will be working IN SOMEONE'S HOME and that respect and courtesy are absolutely vital.

I've heard some bad things, but your experience with this vile man takes the cake. I hope you are not troubled with them again.

FOJN · 20/06/2022 15:09

I think you have been more than patient. The builders behaviour is not your neighbours fault but your neighbours have taken the piss with the scaffolding being up for a month and no work being carried out. You agreed to allow access not to your garden becoming a building site. They have no right to bring a cement mixer into your garden or to use your electricity.

I'm glad you stood up for yourself but I'm afraid I would tell your neighbour they have until the end of the week to remove the scaffolding and that the builder is not permitted to enter your property again once the scaffolding is removed.

BringBackCoffeeCreams · 20/06/2022 15:10

I'm surprised you even reached the point of him coming to do the work. I'd have been withdrawing consent once the scaffolding had sat there for a week without being used, let alone a month. Our builders arrived the day after the scaffolding was erected.

sassyduck · 20/06/2022 15:11

Good for you! YANBU.

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