What would you make of this message?

[Glittersparkle76]

My partner and I have been together on and off for nearly 10 years and we have a 9 year old daughter.He works away in hospitality and comes back to me and my daughter when he gets days off.I woke during the early hours and found this message he had sent,all lovely until I read the part when he said he had loved others more!,I thought WTAF??,why would you even need to say that to me?,are some things best left unsaid??.He's meant to be coming back late tonight for 3 days but now I feel like telling him to fuck off and don't bother!.Am I overreacting to this message?,I feel like I'm second,third or even fourth best now and don't think I will ever be able to get that comment out of my head.
Even if I felt in my past I had loved others more than I do him,I would never say that to him as I don't feel it needs to be said!.
I would love others opinions on this and how they would feel if their partner sent them this message.

The latest messages...

God why does he keep saying ‘right now’, it’s not making it any better. He’s also really struggling to see this from your point of view at all. At the very, very best he’s an absolute idiot. I’m so sorry OP.

’You’re reading it the wrong way’ speaks volumes.

He's coming across worse the more he writes.

Absolutely ridiculous bringing up some what seems to be obsession he had with someone else. I'm not sure I could move past all that even if I wanted to. He's sounding a bit like a future faker .

I'm sorry but his use of emoji's alone would make me want to stab him repeatedly with a knitting needle.

But assuming he's a normal bloke when not texting. If you do want to stay with him after this blows over, tell him he must never text you again unless it's a practical matter. Anything emotional should be discussed on the phone , or preferably- based on these ramblings- not at all.

His messages are cringe, the first one barely makes sense and you deserve more.

Blaming you for not reading his messages correctly would be a red flag just by itself. In normal circumstances if you inadvertently say something that your lived one finds upsetting, you apologise and try and resolve it. Not double down.

as for the caravan idea - just no. “Forever”? Or until you get too old, ill or infirm? What is the plan then?

High on entitlement and arrogance…very, very low on intelligence.

WTF with the fingers?! And the whole 'you're who I want NOW' BOLLOX?!!

Cheeky twat.

I wouldn't be welcoming the div home with open arms, I can safely say that much! He's got a LOT of making up to do!!

How are you supposed to feel after that?!!

Just speak to him face-to-face op.

I'm sorry but I've got less and less patience with this kind of drama these days. Someone either wants to be in the relationship or they don't. You have a child together FGS. And you've just lost your other child. And he's reminiscing to you about a lost love like a love struck teen. I just couldn't ever fancy him again.

Sounds like he dropped an Ecstasy tablet or something, what a weird message to send to someone

What I would make of the messages posted is that he is a bit emotionally immature and self-absorbed when drunk. For some reason he was thinking about women he has loved and, in his uninhibited state, felt compelled to open his heart to you. I'm sure lots of us might have had an intense love in our youth that we wouldn't swap our mature love for, but that made an impression on our psyche nonetheless. Unfortunately, instead of musing privately, he sent you that clumsy text. I don't get the impression from his texts that he considers you a consolation prize; he seems to have made his "confession" in an outpouring of inebriated affection.

I guess I'd be asking - can you live with it and roll your eyes a bit at that kind of message? It's not the worst kind of drunken behaviour, after all. Or is it the last straw that's making you realise you don't want to be with him?

Surprised you say he's English by the way - I also read the texts as coming from a non-native speaker, so maybe take everything I say with a pinch of salt!!

I’d have to ditch him for the emojis alone, let alone the content. It really looks like a pissed person punctuating his thoughts with an uncoordinated poke on the bar. As for what he’s ACTUALLY saying, I wonder if he is confusion the all-encompassing infatuation you feel in immature relationships, that blind you to the faults of the other person and have you doing and feeling crazy things. He MIGHT be saying that he loves you in a calmer, more realistic fashion and appreciates what that means for the rest of your lives together.
That or you are his plan B and he’s realised that Cindy Crawford isn’t about to come crawling.

I meant to say, I am so sorry about your son.

Why is it written in the style of a bizarre poem?

Sorru op

The person he was in love with most he never even spoke to, except for Hello's?? What a strange man. If it's any conciliation it sounds like he has no idea what "love" is and what he means clearly is he lusted after and obsessed about some woman he didn't even know.

I want to punch him so hard.

@Glittersparkle76 I would still be wary of giving up a long term tenancy, especially if it's a HA or council house.

Luxury tourer? Honestly what do you see in him?

Oh wow! He’s properly twisting it so that this is your fault.

anyone seen beam me up softboi on Insta? This is like the 50yr old version…

He was infatuated with a 29 year old or he was 29? Sounds a bit like someone who isn’t taking responsibility for his feelings. They seem to be forced upon him by the womens.

He honestly sounds unbelievably thick.

Is this what “negging” is?

And “unless you reply, I won’t come back” is this some fucked up control thing? Or just firmly making it the OP’s fault?

Fuck that!