To ask if Co-Ed is better than single sex..

LuaDipa · 10/06/2022 20:25

My daughter is in Co-Ed as we also have a ds and wanted them in the same school. If I could go back I would put her in single sex. She’s 13 now and we are actively encouraging her to consider a single sex school but I think we may have left it too late.

For ds Co-Ed was the right choice.

GreatCrash · 10/06/2022 20:28

I was at a single sex school and I was in favour of single sex for DD, but she chose co-ed and I have to say she's thriving. She's in year 9 now.

KazzaN · 10/06/2022 20:35

CHiSOCG · 10/06/2022 20:13

For girls? My DH is keen on Co-Ed. Most of my friends are looking at local single sex grammar or independent. Of course most will go co-ed comprehensive if they don’t pass the 11+ for the grammar.

My daughter went single sex until age 11 then secondary school is co-ed (still private)
Very glad we did is as it's toughened hee up, got her used to boys and made her much more resilient.
Although she says most of the boys are entitled knobs!!😂

Singleandproud · 10/06/2022 20:37

I wanted single sex for Dd, she was accepted but we couldn't afford the fees and didn't get a bursary. Shes quite happy where she is and doesn't complain and made some nice male friends but has asked to reapply for the girls school again in future to try for a scholarship again.

I teach in a co-ed, the girls refuse to take their blazers off even when it's sweltering as you can see their bras through the shirts. Some girls in my form have told me that they don't like to do PE as it's coed or the boys are also on the field and they feel self conscious and don't want to get involved in sports day as the boys will be watching too. Its noticeable when asking for hands up questioning in science that the girls don't put their hands up although will answer if randomly called upon. A female student asked me for help today and the male student sat across from her laughed at her (he wasn't laughing after I told him off). It's difficult to know whether the girls reactions is to do with being in a Co-ed school or whether it's because our students are from a very deprived area and many have anxiety, low self esteem and other various personal challenges but I suspect they would be happier in a single sex school.

CampervanQueen · 10/06/2022 20:39

Research shows that single sex is better for girls; co-ed for boys. But I don't know how you square that circle....

PinkArt · 10/06/2022 20:40

I went to a single sex grammar and wouldn't send my kids to one. Amazing educationally but they're hot houses and breed both competitiveness and self esteem issues in equal measure. It's not a natural environment to be removed from the opposite sex for so much of your formative years.

SilverGlitterBaubles · 10/06/2022 20:40

I'm more for Co Ed, I think single sex schools are an unnatural environment and not reflective of life. I was saddened by speech a male head gave at an all girls school open day when I visited with DD. The theme very much seemed to be girls needed protecting and the presence of boys was a distraction girls could not cope with or that they may be intimidated by them in maths or science. What nonsense and what sort of message does this give girls. School is about more than the academic stuff it's also learning about life, growing up with different experiences, learning how to work with different people and developing friendships.

MissNothing1991 · 10/06/2022 20:41

I went to a single sex secondary school and it was the worst decision I ever made. It was so bitchy and bullying was rife. I'm praying my daughter, who is currently nowhere near the age, doesn't wish to do the same.

mewkins · 10/06/2022 20:45

Singleandproud · 10/06/2022 20:37

I wanted single sex for Dd, she was accepted but we couldn't afford the fees and didn't get a bursary. Shes quite happy where she is and doesn't complain and made some nice male friends but has asked to reapply for the girls school again in future to try for a scholarship again.

I teach in a co-ed, the girls refuse to take their blazers off even when it's sweltering as you can see their bras through the shirts. Some girls in my form have told me that they don't like to do PE as it's coed or the boys are also on the field and they feel self conscious and don't want to get involved in sports day as the boys will be watching too. Its noticeable when asking for hands up questioning in science that the girls don't put their hands up although will answer if randomly called upon. A female student asked me for help today and the male student sat across from her laughed at her (he wasn't laughing after I told him off). It's difficult to know whether the girls reactions is to do with being in a Co-ed school or whether it's because our students are from a very deprived area and many have anxiety, low self esteem and other various personal challenges but I suspect they would be happier in a single sex school.

This is so sad and was also my experience of a (rough) co Ed school. My dd is at an all girls school and is thriving. My first choice was a mixed school but I'm happy with where she ended up. I think there are huge pressures on kids now. I'm quite happy she isn't yet required to 'toughen up' and can enjoy school and get on with learning.

Smartiepants79 · 10/06/2022 20:46

I went to a single sex school and the one thing I thought I wanted for my girls was a co-Ed school.
When it came to choosing however the girls school won hands down.
My Dd is loving it and I love how it is focussed on providing the best experience for their girls. There is no stereotyping and very strong female role models. Being female is celebrated at every turn!
They do socials and activities with the boys school. It’s not perfect but it was right for us.

NeverDropYourMooncup · 10/06/2022 20:48

I went to a co-ed, my girls went to co-ed (no single ones outside private in the area) and I worked in co-eds.

I thought 'resilience' was good.

Then I worked in single sex.

Single sex all the way. I didn't quite appreciate what it's like for girls to not have constant sexual harassment for 6.5 hours in a day until I saw it.

ohfook · 10/06/2022 20:51

CampervanQueen · 10/06/2022 20:39

Research shows that single sex is better for girls; co-ed for boys. But I don't know how you square that circle....

Yes I've read research saying this too. I find it interesting that co-Ed has became the norm and wonder if it would still be the norm if the reverse was true.

CampervanQueen · 10/06/2022 20:53

ohfook · 10/06/2022 20:51

Yes I've read research saying this too. I find it interesting that co-Ed has became the norm and wonder if it would still be the norm if the reverse was true.

Show quote history

Yes it does beg that question doesn't it

Original poster

CHiSOCG · 10/06/2022 20:53

SilverGlitterBaubles · 10/06/2022 20:40

I'm more for Co Ed, I think single sex schools are an unnatural environment and not reflective of life. I was saddened by speech a male head gave at an all girls school open day when I visited with DD. The theme very much seemed to be girls needed protecting and the presence of boys was a distraction girls could not cope with or that they may be intimidated by them in maths or science. What nonsense and what sort of message does this give girls. School is about more than the academic stuff it's also learning about life, growing up with different experiences, learning how to work with different people and developing friendships.

DH went single sex (independent) I went to a co-Ed comprehensive. He hated single sex.

one of my closest friends went single sex and is a huge advocate but it’s the whole - more girls will do maths, science and STEM careers as a result of single sex

OP posts:

VeryQuaintIrene · 10/06/2022 20:55

Absolutely loved mine and didn't experience any of the problems that PP claim for single sex schools. I do think it depends on the individual, though. If the constant sexual harassment that some have experienced in co-ed schools is something girls don't (yet) have to cope with, it's all to the good, IMO. There was plenty of time for me to "toughen up" later and I think I was a lot more confident because I hadn't had to face it through the vulnerable teenage years and knew who I was and my own worth.

PaddingtonBearStareAgain · 10/06/2022 20:57

My siblings and I all went to co-ed

My DSS go to co-ed. My DNiece was in a single sex but has now moved to a co-ed.

The bullying in the single sex was hurrendous and on a wide scale. She is thriving at the co-ed.

pointythings · 10/06/2022 20:59

I teach in a co-ed, the girls refuse to take their blazers off even when it's sweltering as you can see their bras through the shirts.

That isn't an argument for single sex education, it's an argument for a change of uniform supplier!

TullyApplebottom · 10/06/2022 20:59

There’s a huge range of quality and experience available in each category. But all other things being equal, given the way too many boys feel entitled to treat their female peers, single sex for girls of course preferable.

Luredbyapomegranate · 10/06/2022 21:00

I think for most it doesn’t matter either way, just pick the school that you like best overall.

Haggisfish3 · 10/06/2022 21:02

Off topic but I’m a teacher in a mainstream coed secondary. I’m going to do some research into how many girls identify as trans or non binary in single sex compared to coed schools. I think it will be very interesting. I echo someone else who talked about the unprecedented levels of sexualised language and behaviour girls are subject to in mixed schools.

Hunderland · 10/06/2022 21:02

I work I a co-ed - we have lots of applicants from the female single sex school nearby.

MsTSwift · 10/06/2022 21:03

I went co-Ed. Sent my girls single sex. Their experience is so much better - I would have been so much happier in a single sex school.

SpottedOnMN · 10/06/2022 21:05

Depends on the child. My DD was surrounded by a big group of female friends but appreciated having the boys there. My DS is also surrounded by a big group of female friends so would likely have been miserable in a single sex school.

I went to a single sex school and was fine as I was friends with boys outside of school, but lots of the girls acted like boys were a different species.

Ponderingwindow · 10/06/2022 21:08

id say it depends on the child and the particular school options.

my own dd would thrive in an all girls secondary school, but there simply aren’t any realistic options available in our country.

ILoveAllRainbowsx · 10/06/2022 21:09

I went to a single sex school and loved it.

I can't imagine what it would have been like to have had hormonal boys all trying to act "cool" when I was trying to learn.

I also think that social media and the availability of porn means that I would definitely send my daughter to a single sex school if I had one.