Is 38 too old to start trying for first baby

[Lagertha6]

I have been with my DP for 7 years and lived together for 2. We both turn 38 in Jan and have been talking about trying for a baby for about 18 months.

I keep putting it off but with my age factored in I'm beginning to panic that I will have left it too late to have a baby. It would be our first and only one.

I'm worrying as my sister, maternal aunt and cousin on my mums side all had problems conceiving. My sister had IVF which worked, my aunt had first child naturally but couldn't have a 2nd baby via IVF and my cousin also had failed IVF.

will this be a case of repeating history? We are going the states in Jan so agreed to start trying when we get back.

I do want a baby but would be fine if it took a year to have a child as I love my freedom and no responsibility.

Do I start trying in Jan or wait longer?

Thanks so much. I know, I do too. Just wish my body would play ball. There are other ways to have a child if it's not something I'm able to do right now and it becomes too late.

I'm going to just try to stay healthy mentally and will explain to DP XXXXA

I hope this comes across kindly @Lagertha6 , you say your goal is “stay healthy mentally”. Would a better goal be “get healthy mentally”?

”Stay healthy mentally”, suggests coasting along as you are now with the dark thoughts and apathy.

”Get healthy mentally” is a bit more proactive and involves seeking out help to feel a bit more engaged with your life. I think, once you’ve done this, you will feel more comfortable making decisions about what your future looks like.

Yes I agree. I need to get healthy mentally most definitely thank you x

But please understand this option thoroughly - you will not share DNA with your child. And you will have to tell them at 18 years of age that you are not their biological mum.

It's not just about 'having some donor eggs'.

My story: started TTC at 34, almost a year to get pregnant. Feel so blessed to be pregnant at 35 now. To be fully Honest- cannot believe you are so relaxed about getting pregnant so close to 40. Your chances are slim them. When I looked at ivf even at my age of 35 a cycle has only 27% success rate!

A healthy pregnancy is a privilege, I cannot believe some people would put it off so 'they could go on holiday'. I went around America for a month whilst 5 months pregnant, btw. But it's your life, your choices. Good luck and hope it all works out, whatever you decide to do.