Did anyone else get rude comments about their looks growing up?

[Eggandcheesemuffin]

I used to have a very large gap between my front teeth, crooked bottom teeth as well. Had various comments over the years, even a 'friend' told me I'd be so pretty if 'only I fixed my teeth'.

In adulthood I decided to look into braces but then people started saying, oh you don't need braces your teeth are fine etc..
It didn't seem to stop men being attracted to me but they always bothered me.
Anyway I have straight teeth now with no gap as I got Invisalign braces.

Next, my nose, I used to have quite a prominent side profile with a bump. Two (not very nice) exes took it upon themselves to tell me I had a big nose. It wasn't just them, I'd never liked it myself. As the front was fine, I started to get nose filler which I still get today. It's significantly improved my nose, people tell me I don't need it but I feel like I don't want to go back to my old nose.

Also had very bad acne which the same ex and 'friend' commented on. The ex told me he had been 'embarrassed to be seen with me in public' because my spots were so bad.
Acne was more of a common issue so people weren't as mean about it, but with age it's just cleared up, and I only have a couple of spots now though I remember being at the front of a class and some kids whispering "She's got a really spotty face."

With the awful ex, I came across a text one day that his female friend had sent him, when she found out he was interested in me. She said, "Don't go for her, she's really ugly! You can't possibly stoop so low!"

Of course that made me feel great.

Anyway I'm happy with my looks today although it's sad I ended up 'fixing" all these things. Just thinking about it today made me angry. Why did any of these people feel the right to pick on my looks like that? Has anyone else been through this?

Yes, and it can really play on your mind. Some of those comments are really spiteful and say more about your friends.

I used to get jibes about my big bottom, I look at photos of me then and I wasn’t overweight. My dad went through a phase of chasing me round with a camera taking photos of my bum 🙄. But of course they’d say I was ridiculously over sensitive and making mountains out of molehills.

Fellow buck teeth four-eyes over here.

I used to get told I look like a donkey.

I now really like these aspects of my appearance.

I had fixed braces almost the whole of high school, both top and bottom teeth (yes, 4 years, they were baaaaaad). I got them the summer before I started there though, so they were just accepted - I did get a few cruel remarks but nothing that really upset me. The worst I got was comparatively recently, the medication I take can cause yellowing teeth and mine were badly affected. Someone asked when the last time I'd cleaned them was because "that can't be natural, your mouth must be nasty and your breath must stink!" I was already really self conscious about it, and also felt it was really unfair after going through 5+ years of orthodontal treatments as a teenager. I've since spent probably too much money on veneers, but my confidence has improved a lot and I smile in photos now.

Yep, I was a plain child.
(Being called an ' underachiever ' by a relative has been worse though or thick )
The negative will stay with you , never the times you were praised.

I think you're very right.

My mum is wonderful and very loving but I don't remember ever being told I was pretty by her or anyone when I was growing up. I'll never ever forget her saying "nice legs, shame about the face" once though when I was young, she really didn't mean it to be horrible, she was just joking. She'd be heartbroken if she knew I remembered this.

I grew up having zero self esteem for many reasons, I hated how I looked and like you, had no buffer to fall back on. I took every negative comment to heart. When I had my own children I made a point and still do, of telling them they are absolutely beautiful as often as I can. I'm doing the opposite of what I experienced in an attempt to instill some self esteem into them. Hope I'm following the right track!

Glasses from the age of 6.
Ginger hair & freckles.
Went from stick thin to suddenly having big boobs when I hit puberty.
A boy once told me I’d be ‘fit’ if I lost weight!
I’ve had Ginger used as an insult since childhood but I love my hair!

I’ve always been fat and ugly, and people have always told me. People are cruel and don’t realise how much it hurts.

Loads. Bad teeth, a nose like a witch's, bad skin. I was ugly then and I'm still quite ugly now despite having done what I could to fix myself.

My mum was awful - always commenting on how pretty and slim other girls were. I have learned to hate the word slim!!

my aunts used to talk loudly about how big I was, what I ate and how big my breast were - I was 13!

my mum told me I had really small eyes - which has really stayed with me.

and when I started work she had all the men would be commenting about my large breasts.

she denies this all now. But I hear her starting to say it about my niece.

Another nasty one was when a friend of my bf said to my face that I was really fucking ugly. It did hurt but when I told my bf obviously upset he said absolutely nothing which made me start to cry as I thought if the person who supposed to love me couldn't even say "you're beautiful to me" or anything to comfort me then it must be true. That one is still in my head sometimes. Fucker,still it did help me to end it eventually.

Yes, constantly growing up- bad skin, ginger hair, a bit fat, a series of bad haircuts. People I knew and strangers. It's left me with a life time of low self esteem and over valuing looks and other people's opinions of me. I've had disordered eating for over 30 years but my confidence is better than it was. I would still change things about the way I look but it bothers me less now than when I was younger. Having said that, I work hard to look conventionally 'attractive' (slim, long hair etc.) and it can be exhausting at times!

Dad used to call me the Michelin Man. He made himself laugh so hard over that.

I was always fat and it ruined so much of my life- constant bullying, no self esteem, no confidence, treated appalling by men when after validation. I am incredibly bitter at my parents for letting me be fat- it wasn't something I could control. When I got to be a teenager and understood how to lose weight, I did and looking back I was very attractive but the bullied mindset was there and I despised myself and let people treat me dreadfully.

Nearly 40 now and a lot more balanced but I can still quote things said to me and I've significantly underachiever in my life due to the bashed confidence.

You'd be OK looking if you could just get rid of the weight (grandma)

Big fat First name Surname (sung loudly and regularly by school bullies)

A fat lass with no tits (classmate)

How does it feel to be a fat slag (brother)

Having trouble losing the baby weight ('friend' to me age 14 pushing a friend's buggy)

We can get you some pills, get rid of all that lard (ex)

I've never felt pretty. When younger I was frequently compared to cousins who were way prettier (and academically cleverer). Damaged my self esteem massively.

I also have a gap in my top front teeth and had a few comments over the years. When I spoke to my dentist about braces I was strongly discouraged and he told me I suited the gap and it's seen as a positive in many cultures around the world. The first time anyone said something positive about my teeth! I still hate it though.

I had terrible acne in my teens and early 20s, which left me with ice pick type scars on my cheeks. I've had some comments on my skin over the years. I try not to let it bother me but it's hard.

Dad referred to me as ‘fatso’, mum told me I had ‘thick ankles’.
Having a ski slope nose, which my DH thinks is cute, led to me being called ‘pig nose’.
I have always told my children they are beautiful and I always tell redheaded children they have gorgeous hair.

As a teenager.

I used to be quite sporty and do athletics at county level and cycle (for fun, not competitively). So I was quite slim, thin even. I was vegetarian, which was largely ignored at home, so I had to supplement with my own food, luckily I had a part time job, along with college. I did eat a lot when I could. I had a good appetite.

Some people would make negative comments about it, which I hated (though, confusingly, some people would compliment me), but my family were the worst. My own stepfather said I was too thin to have a good figure which was beyond inappropriate in my opinion. A male friend said I'd be his type if I wasn't so slim, I said something like 'Well, who said you'd be my type?' Which was apparently unkind, and then he was offended.

Some of my 'friends' had a nick name for me, something to do with 'skeletal' which they used for me behind my back. I overheard it once and pretended I hadn't. So my confidence wasn't great. The only thing that convinced me I wasn't grotesque was that I occasionally did hair modelling and I'd have photos of my hair and face up in a couple of the chain salons, and did similar elsewhere.

I'm still slim and sporty now, though not thin, but it still impacts on you about how unkind people were, and how they felt they had the right to comment on a person's looks.

Sorry for the essay!

Sooo many!!
I was really busty from a young age but I really wasn't interested in boys til i was about 17 so I felt really uncomfortable all the comments I got (as people knew it made me uncomfortable). One girl made a comment about them one day and I'd had enough and asked if she was jealous and she said yes! They stopped then thankfully.
I got comments about my glasses and my freckles too.
I'm 30 now and more comfortable in my own body than I've ever been. Still busty and still wearing glasses, and get seasonal freckles!

I have such a strong memory of being on a school tour bus when I was 12 and the girl next to me turning to me and saying "wow your nose is so pointy". I had never even thought about it before and now I'm 30 and still repulsed by my side profile. And actually partners have always complimented my nose, but I'll never shake that comment.

Mostly from my mum. Big ears, were a discussion point, Toby jug ears etc. Talk about getting them pinned back. As an adult I quite like my ears, but felt very self conscious in my younger years.
Flat chest , thanks mum.
Big bum, again mum, big bums not fashionable when I grew up.
I don't think she was intending to be hurtful, just projecting her own I securities onto me. Quite successfully as it turned out.

Thick wavy hair, big nose, small eyes , no lips, jut jaw, bow legs. So my time at secondary school was horrific. Sad to say the comments continue to this day and I am nearly 50. People still laugh in my face when I tell them I am married with a child. People can be cruel and ignorant, even people you think of as educated, such as the teachers I work with.

Oh yes!

Used to be called fat lip in primary school because I had fuller lips (not huge or anything, normal really). Or told I have black person’s lips “are you black did you bleach yourself”?

I have a rounded bottom that gives Kim K a run for her money. Always was told I look like a chair from behind.

Now people pay for lips and bums so….

People are so mean.
Oh and once I was standing outside a classroom in high school waiting for the bell and some boys in the grade above said my body was to die for but I should put a bag over my head as the face doesn’t match. Niceeee

Yes. From my mother (seems to be a common theme!)

She had my lazy eye corrected when I was six or so. My ears pinned back when I was ten. Thereafter it was comments like 'Your hair doesn't suit you like that' or 'Only tarts wear make up'.

Even when I was in my 40s she still did it. I recounted a story to her, about some chap telling me I was attractive/sexy, and she just said "YOU?!!" in a tone of utter disbelief.

I once asked her why she'd never told me I was pretty. Not once, in my life. And did she understand that her comments directly contributed to my lack of self-esteem. She blustered about how no-one had ever told her she was pretty, that she didn't think of her children's attractiveness...a lot of shite basically.

Some people just can't help being nasty.

Yeah, not about my face or hair but I was tall for my age and have always been big boned (as an adult I wont fit into anything smaller than a 10-12 without stretch even at my very thinnest).

My mum grew up in the Twiggy era and idolises a slight frame. And god, don't I know about it. I had phases of being chubby as a kid and my dad joined in the criticism, comparing me in character and physicality to a very obese, reclusive relative who has a lot bigger problems than just her weight.

I don't have a huge bust either which, I think, would have mitigated my flaws in my mum's eyes. I was made very aware of that too.

I've been bulimic for 25 years and have fuckall self esteem.

Also from my mum asking why I wasn’t blonde, pretty with blue eyes?! Erm, dunno mum, maybe because you made me like this and you’re not blonde and neither is dad?

I was regularly called pizza face, motorway chest as a teenager. I also had braces and was skinny.

My brother is the opposite of me. He is handsome, successful, earns a high wage and makes my parents very proud. I remember when I was about 12, my Mum was saying how cute my brother's button nose was. She then said, "I don't know what happened to yours, it used to be the same."

At the age of 8 I wanted to go to ballet classes. My Mum said I couldn't go as she didn't want be dancing around like a fairy elephant. I was very skinny at the time.

My parent's friend would greet me with "Hello ugly" every time he saw me and my parents didn't comment.

I look back at old photos and I was pretty, just couldn't see it at the time. I still have low self esteem.