Massive argument with boyfriend - was I unreasonable?

[SarahLooo124]

Hello,
We've been together 4 years, hardly argue and overall very happy together.

Last night, he had to go to hospital (nothing serious, but he felt some pain in his stomach area); I'd never been to A and E before so I didn't realise just how long waiting times were apart from what I hear on the news.
So I waited in the car as he said he'll be about 2 hours and i wasn't allowed to sit in with him (fair enough)<. 6 hours later, it's 11:30pm,I'm still waiting in the car, haven't eaten since breakfast, and my phone was about to die.

I quickly rang him asking how long he'll be and he said he doesn't know. For some reason I snapped on the phone and said (I admit in a bitchy way) that he'll have to come back on his own tomorrow then as I can't wait in this car any longer.

2 minutes later, he comes running to the car saying he was just about to see the Dr but he had to tell the Dr he had to go and the Dr was worried about his stomach. He called me an autistic bitch because I didn't just get out the car and walk to the cafe in the hospital and that I make everything complicated and he feels like my babysitter. (I'm not autistic btw).

I snapped back that it was his idea for me to come and that he said I could wait with him, and if I'd have known it'd be sitting in a car, I'd have waited in the house.

This was in quite shouty voices.

But I feel absolutely awful that he has to go back tonight. I look back and think I could've just carried on waiting in the car but in the moment, I just snapped.

Did he really need to go to A&E? If he was well enough to consider a supermarket shop then he can’t have been that bad.

It's a tricky one. Before I was hospitalised with an embolism I started to feel ill, but I didn't know that and made myself go to B&Q with DP! All very stiff upper lip.

On the other hand, when I was finally carted into A&E I definitely wasn't going anywhere - and I most certainly wouldn't have been running out to cars or shouting at my girlfriend/boyfriend, or having arguments, and/or going home. That's the bit for me that strongly suggests the horrible boyfriend was making things up.

Are you joking?? Your ignorance is staggering.

It was massively unreasonable of him to expect you to wait in the car, but having made that mistake it's up to you to get yourself out of that situation using other means of transport. Its a really useful life skill to be able to get yourself around without driving, wherever you are. Incidentally what was wrong with him any way?

I don’t think you’re an awful person at all. Going against the grain but I think it’s your partner who was the unreasonable one here. It seems to me that it is in fact HIM that wants babysitting. He could have easily driven himself to the hospital or got you to drop him and pick him up later, but he made sure you had no choice but to be dragged along and effectively trapped and left in a car for hours on end. You were perfectly within your rights to get impatient with him after 6 bloody hours of waiting, bored and hungry. It’s not like he was at deaths door and you’re not a robot ffs.

So did he ever get seen and treated? What’s wrong with him?

I guess we'll never know.

Yes you were. Nuff said.

What are you talking about? Many people have never been to A&E I’m sure! I know I wouldn’t have if I hadn’t had to bring my child there around 10 years ago (I’m early 50’s now). Not everyone uses A&E for no good reason you know.