Part 6 keeping it civil - the Depp Heard jury is out

[ENoeuf]

www.mumsnet.com/talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/4556643-part-5-aibu-to-want-15-minutes-fame-depp-v-heard

hoping we can continue to discuss without unpleasantness - so far so good.

I know min, she is obsessed!

Interesting choice of songs, at least with "Isolation" and "What's Going On". JD's musical career goes back years. Not my cup of tea but whatever. I hope the extra chunk is an indicator that he is off the drugs and booze; fingers crossed.

What wins out in these cases, then, is not a person or a side, but instead the machinery that gets built around them: tabloids and platforms. Both cases set a dangerous precedent for social media companies, which are learning in real-time how they can capture an audience as real lives are turned into dramas. As Harry Clarke-Ezzidio wrote about the memeification of Depp vs Heard in the New Statesman: “The brazen coverage and dismissive attitude towards the allegations of abuse and assault in the… trial – exemplified by memes and chaotic TikToks – may form a new and concerning template for how public opinion is formed: one based on borderline tribalism, lacking in nuance and critical thinking.”

Despite terrifying admissions from Depp during the six-week trial, including that he painted messages in his own blood on their walls after a fight, the internet and the tabloids have decided that Heard’s testimony is a fabrication. On TikTok, memes and lip syncs mocking her tear-filled stories gather millions of viewers. On Twitter, hashtags such as #AmberHeardIsAPsychopath and #AmberHeardIsALiar trend with tens of thousands of tweets simultaneously. Heard has also been subject to in-person harassment, with Depp fans flocking outside the courthouse to film videos to share online, dressed in costumes depicting her as “Amber Turd” and squealing in delight as Depp drives by, as though it were a celebrity meet and greet.

Meanwhile, much of the online commentary about the Depp-Heard trial contrasts sharply with the actual evidence presented in the courtroom. Heard described more than a dozen experiences of violence — which Depp called “insane” and “all false.” While Depp described himself as “a Southern gentleman who had respect for women,” texts Depp sent to Heard called her a “worthless hooker.” In others, he joked about wanting to “smack the ugly c--- around.” He also joked about burning and raping her dead body in a text sent to his friend and fellow actor Paul Bettany. The trial also revealed that Depp spent a lot of time with Marylin Manson, a man who has been accused of rape by several women — and who is also suing one of them for defamation. (Like Depp, Manson denies the allegations.)

Heard’s every gesture has been analyzed and scrutinized. Depp’s odd behavior? Not so much. The actor smiled, grinned and snacked on candy throughout the trial. Depp is either an abuser, or a victim of abuse. But his body language throughout this excruciating ordeal has remained casual, even cheerful. It would be hard to imagine Heard getting away with similar (even seeming) nonchalance.

Articles from New Statesman/MSNBC.

I’d love to be linked to some kind of scholarly or well-written article in favour of Depp??

Or something that links to the idea of the social media coverage of the trial being acceptable or justified, or that treating a DV trial as ‘fun’ or a spectacle is a positive way to move forward. How AH deserves the treatment she is receiving online. I’d like to read that side, an opinion piece. So if anyone can link me - that would be great.

I don't understand this viewpoint that they are one or the other. Why can't he be both? I think they are both abusers and victims.

I have just listened to a very long audio where snippets have been taken and used in court. But I have listened to the whole thing for context.

What I heard was she gets mad very quickly and can't control it and gets physically and verbally abusive and he runs away which makes it worse. She feels insecure and unsafe. So it goes on.

She says something to him, he gets defensive very quickly and gets verbally abusive and then she does too and they both get physical. He goes on benders or gets drunk/high and gets physically violent and becomes the monster , she tries to calm him or fights and it gets physical and verbally abusive. He instigates it.

They both reference normal times where they argue normally when he is clear headed and not the monster. He tries to maintain this but can't because he is an addict. So it goes on.

It's the ultimate toxic and complicated relationship like JD says in his testimony.

Because that won’t sell headlines.

It is ALWAYS going to be so and so versus so so.

Tabloid press and social media thrive off this simplistic black and white view of the world, because (unfortunately) a lot of their readers share this extremely reduced and simplified world view. Not saying these people are lacking in intelligence, more that our complex, messy, and sometimes illogical world is sometimes easier to stomach when neatly organised into ‘boxes’ that suit.

@mummyrocks1

because she is not a perfect victim.

I think it’s likely that they have both been abusive.

her being abusive doesn’t cancel out his abuse.

given that she won the UK trial, given they are both exaggerating/abusive etc, given that he is bringing the trial against her, why is she being slain on social media?

defamation. Similarly if he chooses to speak out about abuse he should not be silenced.

what I hate is the circus around it. Women have been called whores, cunts etc etc fuck her dead body. And it is being glossed over.

Is there an ability for either party to appeal if the ruling is found not in their favour?

@Blackbird2020

you are exactly right and readers are thriving off it. But it is horrible. And I would have expected better from Mumsnet.

@Blackbird2020

i believe so. But when JD tried to appeal in the UK it was rejected.

I'm not sure about anyone else, but I'm not paying attention to any newspaper or main stream media or even social media opinion pieces.

Because that's all they are, just opinions. I can form my own opinion, I don't need thiers.

What has been really interesting in the 6 threads, is most posters have formed and expressed an opinion based on watching the trial.

Sometimes I have agreed, sometimes I have not agreed with posters opinions.
But 99.9% of the time, its is an opinion they have formed on thier own.

Agreed min

I don't trust MSM and want to figure it out myself, watch with my own eyes.

I have read major news outlets and if anyone relies on those alone, on whoever's side, then are are not getting anywhere near the full picture

I wouldn't. Having seen so many threads where men have behaved abusively or unacceptably, women are urged to question ourselves before we question male behaviour. It must be something we have done. If their behaviour really stretches the boundary of decency, we should cut them some slack, because 'he might have depression, or be on the spectrum).

There is nothing a man can do that a good degree of responsibility won't be placed on females. To women like me, who insist my fellow-women deserve better than this, the stock responses are 'LTB is all MN EVER suggests!' (it isn't) and 'you are man-hater!', which is as lazy and ridiculous as the shortcut to thinking it actually is.

One look at this site is as good evidence as anyone needs that the good ole patriarchy really has its grip on society. It also shows that women who've internalized this high bar of standards for themselves and low one for men are the sadly often the most censorious when it comes to other women, especially those who want to challenge this state of play.

Amber Heard is a case in point. So is Meghan Markle, so was Joanne Lees, so was Lindy Chamberlain, so was Kate McCann. I could name many, many more.

It's thoroughly, thoroughly depressing.

I don’t blame either of them for leaving the circus to focus on themselves now they’ve done all they can in court. This trial must have been very stressful for both. JD has previously said he finds playing music eases his stress. Hopefully she will be able to relax with her partner and baby. Eve Barlow is not helping matters on the social media side though being so argumentative.

Greyhop
given that she won the UK trial

That would be the trial that the Sun won?

Johnny wannabe rebel rock god pretends to be a rock stay he does look a little pathetic

If you want to criticise him, feel free, but at least be fair. He moved to LA in his early twenties (perhaps earlier) as part of a rock band playing the guitar. So it isn’t something he has adopted in his later years.

He has been playing guitar with well known bands and vocalists for years

If my memory serves, there is quite a few actors and actresses who are musicians and play in rock bands.

Keanu Reeves is one that springs to mind.

Does anyone know more about the woman who shouted out In court, something like Johnny we had a real connection,what would you do if this baby is yours...

Anthony Hopkins composes music and plays the piano, he posted playing music with his cat during lockdown

The Law and Crime network reported that later on she said she did it as a joke. www.mirror.co.uk/3am/celebrity-news/johnny-depp-fan-claims-star-27047920