My family is being harassed by a 13 year old girl

[Backachesandheadaches]

This sounds absolutely bizarre because I KNOW she is a child and she SHOULDNT have this much power but here we are.

DS (12) had a friend we'll call her Hannah (not her real name) who is 13 they always had a turbulent friendship which involved Hannah abusing my son physically/mentally and emotionally, on a daily basis and then crying when he would react at her.
Anyway they fell out for good after she disclosed a horrific secret of my DS's one of which is true and has affected him massively.

Ever since my family have dealt with graffiti on our property and all over the area we live, random bouts of knock a door run between the hours of 10pm and 11pm all times having woken our youngest child (4) and he becoming hysterical through fear, we have dealt with Hannah and her friend let's call her Emma (not real name again) shouting obscenities at the house when windows are open, we are STILL dealing with Hannah and Emma prank calling MY phone number on a regular basis (over 60 calls) and acting like idiots over the phone, Hannahs mum has tried to have me done for harassment (?!) This was counter reported by myself as we are not causing any harassment and are in fact essentially sitting on the back lines watching it happen to us. We have had Hannahs mother call the police maliciously and LIE to the police telling them me and the kids were being beaten (not true and police saw it wasn't) and today we have been PULLED by the police on a 'tip off' made by Hannah and Emma that my partner is driving under the influence of alcohol and drugs (both tests were negative)

What can we actually do about this? I report every single incident to the police and absolutely NOTHING Is done about it! We have blocked all their phone numbers, we are being FORCED to move out of our home of the last 13 years due to this! We move by the end of the year.

Nobody is taking us seriously, we are being reported maliciously left right and center for things that are categorically untrue and false and are all malicious.

I know it's not the Hannahs mother as she no longer drives past my house as the police told her to stay away from me due to her harassment, but her daughter and her daughters friend are constantly walking past my house on a daily basis which is how they've snapped a photo of my partners car to make the malicious call.

We are essentially trapped in this and have no way out. Police aren't being helpful, we can't go and sort it ourselves (as tempting as it is) what the hell do we do?

We are DESPERATE

Ring Camera

I would contact social services. The girl sounds mentally unstable and clearly isn't getting support from her mother.

I'd also contact the school every single time you are harassed. This will in turn aid any social services investigation.

It might be expensive initially but is there anything you could economise on so that you can afford the Ring doorbell ? Go on eBay or look on the internet for cheap deals. Keep the footage and keep reporting to the police. I’d also contact social services and your local council. If you’re in social housing they’re risking eviction for anti social behaviour, but you need to be able to provide evidence to back up your reports, and the Ring camera will do this - you may even find it’s enough to deter them, especially if you put up CCTV warning signs.

Do you have the incidents documented?
Phone calls, texts, police reports, photos of vandalism, etc.?

If so, file a restraining order against them in court.

Amazon do them and often have sales on them and also pay monthly, although I don't think they offer pat monthly to everyone

Such is the idiotic legal system that the neighbour would probably be prosecuted for 'assault on children', the fact they they were being little shits would be ignored, sadly.

I’m pretty sure you can’t get a restraining order as such as they are only handed out at the end of criminal trial
you can apply for a civil injunction which can order them to not come within a certain distance or other stuff
The forms are free and you can do it yourself but I would advise you to get a solicitor to do it for you might cost a few ££
I’m pretty familiar with this as my ex neighbour has a restraining order that was done when he was convicted in the Crown Court of violence involving knives and machetes against us .
his order is until further notice so basically for ever

The mad fucker is deliberately trying to move back to live opposite me and I now have to get the CPS and the courts change the order to protect me

I've got photos of the vandalism on my door and all other vandalism around the area we live, I've got screen shots of all the call logs that come through as private number as that what they call me off repeatedly. I've got the school on board after a particularly nasty assault on their grounds, I've got numerous police incident numbers and text messages from the beginning of time from her mother and hannah herself. I've got video evidence of when they was friends and she choke slammed my 4 year old onto the sofa and smacked my 12 year old full force around the face in the same incident (its why she was banned from coming into my house) I've sent over the chat log from my sons WhatsApp to mine of what she said to him. I've done everything I can to get the evidence. We are looking into a restraining order and a cease and desist order and suing them for defamation and slander/libel.

As for reporting to SS its crossed my mind but at this point it will go into 'tit for tat' territory, the mother has a vendetta against her own neighbours and has roped her entire street into her crusade, she constantly reports them to the point they will be homeless if it carries on. We all live in social housing. So if she can do this to her neighbour she is definitely the driving force behind what is happening to us as well.

We just want it to end, we want a peaceful life, not having to wonder if its the police who's going to come to the house or if we're going to get another series of calls etc we also have the calls recorded. I use my partners phone to video the calls. Admittedly sometimes we do lose our shit on the phone back as its unrelenting and I can handle it for a week or so and then I just lose it, the calls stop for a few days then it starts again. As the police use private number and various other people use it I have no choice but to answer them I usually hang up if its them.

Keep a record of every single incident and also then police reports. Report to the council as anti social behaviour.

See a solicitor who can apply for a Protection from Harrassment Order against them both.

What does the school say? Im assuming youve spoken to the head at the school.

@Backachesandheadaches Heyyy op this sounds horrible im sorry this is happening to you all, :( try klarna you pay stuff off 3 monthly anyone can get it they have lots of stores on there too, including amazon and ebay! hopefully moving sorts it all for u especially your son xxx

Is there a reason why you cant change your number? Seems like an easy way to reduce some of the harassment

@HangOnToYourself stubbornness if I'm honest, I shouldn't have to change a number I've had for 13 years and then go through the ball ache of updating it to every single company/school/everyone else etc it's more effort to do all of that. I'm not making excuses for not changing my number I simply don't want to change it nor should I have too. I keep thinking she will get bored but she hasn't (yet) and partly because if she keeps up the harassment it makes it easier for us to sue her mother and get the cease and desist and restraining orders in place. Basically I'm letting her screw herself and her mother over.

Can you change you numbers?

Obviously it won’t stop everything else but it will stop the prank calls.

Sorry cross posted.

You can change your number and the police can use dh number as a contact. You can have all your calls screened which only allows known numbers. What do the council or housing association advise.

I get that but is that worse than living in fear of tirades of calls like you said? A friend was being harassed by an ex and the police said they expected her to change her number before they would go down the restraining order route. I'm surprised you are willing to give up your home but not your phone number.

Phone police HQ and say you want to make a formal complaint. When I worked in a police station that tended to make people take notice. Alternatively speak to your MP. You should be getting help with this, it sounds horrible.

A power hose at the ready. And those noise things that only teenagers can hear.

Only answer known people on your phone, others can whatsapp you or text or voice message and you ring them back. Silent mode. How did they get your number anyway?

Police for assaults every.single.time.

Sounds like you might have an ally in the neighbour who is also being harassed. My enemies enemy is my friend so to speak.

Without all out war and indeed tit for tat, I'd probably just sit tight and make a record of every incident, everything you possibly can. Just in case you need it in future. Maybe a neighbour has a doorbell cam if you can't afford?

The time it'd take to achieve Justice through any court, social service intervention, anything like that is not going to be til after you've left anyway so try to play it down to the family and hopefully summer and lighter nights will make them lose interest for fear of getting caught.

I can't offer any different advice to that already offered on here, but my deepest sympathies OP. It's very easy for people who don't know what it's like to be dismissive, but I don't blame you at all for moving away. What a completely fucked up family they must be.

Yes really. When overstretched authorities (naturally) have no time for this neighbourhood shite its quicker & simpler to handle it in-house.

Think I had a Reply fail

I would personally block all private numbers to your phone and either get a second pay as you go solely for the police to contact you on, or ask them to email you so that you can ring them back on 101 at a prearranged time. Alternatively, ask them not to ring off a private number. It's not as if they ring you off their personal mobiles.

Keep on with the police. You have evidence; they do not. They will not be the first people to try to counter-accuse as a way to deflect blame. The police should be well used to this sort of thing. If it's not going anywhere, ask for a meeting then make a complaint.

Honestly though, I would be looking forward to moving: home, schools, the lot. I get that it feels like defeat, but you only get one life and this is taking over yours and your son's. Have a fresh start somewhere else. It may well end up being the best thing you ever did.