To not cater for this

[Just1moreq]

I'm cooking for 10 tonight. 5 couples, in the group there is someone who has a nut allergy and someone who has cealiocs (I've never figured the spelling) one of the pairs have just called to say that they are doing vegan weekends to reduce their carbon impact.... They are just checking that somethung tonight will be suitable... I've said it wont but that they are more than welcome to bring stuff. ... Am I being an unreasonable arse?

Response

Thats a fantastic lifestyle choice but something best kept for the privacy of your own home.

So they are giving you about 6 hours notice of a challenging dietary requirement?

I would want to tell them to fuck off and not bother coming. Realistically, I would tell them to bring something for themselves.

I've already responded and said no. Making sure I'm not going to poison someone or hospitalise them is my main worry.

Perfectly reasonable to say no - if they'd told you a fortnight ago I'd have considered it but not only telling you this morning!!

Their reasoning makes no sense if they’re going out for a meal. Presumably you’ve already bought the stuff - it’s a sunk cost in terms of carbon - so getting more stuff would only increase their carbon impact?

Also how are they "reducing their carbon impact" telling you the same day?!
You've likely already bought the food - so it goes to waste AND you have to make another drive to the supermarket and back. I'd be tempted to point this out to them after a glass of wine later.

Surely in their shoes you'd just swap to doing Sunday and Monday as your Vegan days this week and enjoy the food offered tonight. Bizarre.

Stop being silly @Kindofcrunchy
It's far too late for a text like that. The meat will already be bought!

Spot the 'its all about me' vegan

I hadn't actually thought of the carbon imprint thing tbh.
More of my own workload, (selfisly?)
I would be totally happy to do my best normally, but not by adding this to my to do list today.

I'm slightly more compassionate towards people who will get ill if they eat something cross contaminated rather than someone who would have happily eaten my planned meal yesterday and will happily eat it again Monday

Yeah, they can just do different vegan days this week. How annoying, giving a few hours' notice. YANBU

Tell them to bring their own food?

YANBU! How ridiculous of them to expect you to cater to that and at last minute.

It’s completely up to them if they want to eat vegan a couple of days a week. But with a few hours notice for the host they can make that Monday and Tuesday instead.

Tell them you’ve got a carrot in the fridge and can pick a tulip out the garden for a garnish.

If they were actual vegans then fine. Weekend vegans? They can get to fuck.

Agree. They move their vegan weekend to sunday/Monday instead and enjoy what you've already planned. They didn't even need to mention it to you - the fact that they did makes me think that they were wanting people to know how "good" they are.

They are being totally unreasonable. They shouldn’t have even asked. They should just swap a day this week and eat vegan on a weekday at home instead of expecting you to change your dinner party meal plan with 6 hours notice.

The OP isn’t running a restaurant.

And compassion works both ways. Which isn’t 6 hours before a meal telling your host you don’t fancy eating something.

What a selfish twat

YANBU OP. I have a couple of severe allergies & I also have dietary restrictions based on choice. I wouldn’t necessarily expect you to cater for either because I appreciate the stress & difficulty involved with allergy avoidance in particular. And I absolutely wouldn’t expect you to cater for choice based restrictions in the circumstances which you describe. They are being cf’s! Let them eat vegan on their own time!

That's quite rude of them to give you such short notice! And seeing as they're not vegan 100% of the time could they not just be a bit flexible this week 🤔yanbu.

Nut allergies and Coeliac disease are serious health issues. Veganism is a choice.

I'd be telling them to feck right off.

I'll make this clearer, before I get jumped on - if a friend was visiting who is an actual vegan then of course you'd be out of order to not cater for them.

Part-time vegans who do it for attention don't get to impress their carbon footprints on you, however. Especially at short notice.

Cheeky. Feckers.